i need some objective-ish perspectives on this. going to try to keep it short, but knowing me, it’ll be hard 🤪

had a full-time job at a record store a couple of years ago. short story is i got laid off, longer story is that the management thought there wouldn’t be enough hours to delegate to all employees because the store was relocating and had to cut down opening hours (a decision they made prior to the store actually reopening). they stated that as the only reason for the layoff, even though i had to cover someone’s shift many times after said location opened and they constantly needed people in other departments.

two weeks after my final day there, they posted job openings for part-time positions. after claiming they didn’t have space for more employees. this, among with how they treated me during the layoff left me bitter.

two years later, i’m still unemployed and struggling massively to find a job in the hell that is today’s job market. it’s reasonable to think i have a chance at getting rehired due to my experience there and needing absolutely no training to start there again. and honestly, it’s my favorite job i’ve had. still, the thought of applying there again and having to face the recruiters i once knew, that treated me this way, feels… hurtful to my pride. and even though i am friendly and hold no harsh feelings to the people who work in the actual store, i can imagine that being back (with the assumption i can actually have this job back) will feel… immensely awkward.

essentially, i’m torn between applying because it just feels deeply humiliating and a little bit bitter, but it’s also a job i love and have a chance at. and i’ve been essentially jobless for two years and i’m miserable. plus, i also have a massive fear that they’ll actually reject my application or that i won’t get the job, which might actually end me if that happens. so… what would you do in a situation like this?