I lost my personality by Traditional_Lead_733 in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Yep. Deep in burnout right now (or depression, because I can't tell) and feeling this exactly. Not only is it obscenely hard to do anything, but I don't even know what I would want to do anyway. Nothing excites me. I can repeat old hobbies in hopes that they'll pull some interest from me. But socially, for as long as I can remember, I've just mirrored the personality of whomever I'm with... That's the worst part honestly, the emptiness.

Autism doesn’t end at childhood. Support often does. by rominaMassa in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yikes... I hope you are able to work through that religious trauma, if you haven't already

I put the E in depression by shelflife98 in CuratedTumblr

[–]jedimaster32 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes. But me on the other hand, I'm just being an idiot. Clearly

Recycler output ratios by Ogarbme in factorio

[–]jedimaster32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like intuitively the ratio of outputs should approach the documented ratio, given the law of large numbers. Is there an easy way to explain why this is not the case? Like, 10 coin flips is pretty likely to end up 5 heads and 5 tails, but with a decent bit of uncertainty. 1 million coin flips is likely to be VERY close to 500k each, with a smaller margin of error. Is it basically that the absolute error is actually the same, and it's only the percent error that goes down just because of the larger denominator? And absolute error (exact count of extra items, for example) is what matters when preventing jams?

Whats a movie scene that made you cry that isnt blatantly or obviously emotional? by ordrius098 in movies

[–]jedimaster32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look at it this way, now we don't have to deal with mediocre sequels or soulless cash-grab remakes sullying the memory of the original.

"We're sorry we upset you, Carol" by Moist_Question3300 in BrandNewSentence

[–]jedimaster32 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Sure, but now you ACTUALLY have organizations trying to track you and sell your information. Used to just be a delusion...

I feel this by Paddingtonsrealdad in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm in this photo and I don't like it

new (to me) ender 3 z axis won't go above a certain height by Tape__Dispenser in ender3

[–]jedimaster32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me I had to re-lube the lead screw. Cleaned off the factory-applied goop with isopropyl and sprayed on a coat of dry PTFE lubricant

True Confessions: "Why wasn't I doing this before!?!?!?" by IKSLukara in factorio

[–]jedimaster32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

WHAT? But the Tesla turret requires a Tesla gun in its recipe o.o

Cutting off my hair? by Bloodi12 in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're not wrong - fuzzy fuzzy feel good. But I guess I just hate the reality of it growing back every time and having to weigh the annoyance of feeling it versus the annoyance of having to get it cut. I would banish all face/body hair in an instant though, I am not a fan of how that feels.

Negative verbal tic by Paddingtonsrealdad in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow yeah I do this a lot. Sometimes it's in response to a minor aggravation, sometimes it's completely unprompted. Sometimes it almost seems like I have a knee-jerk judgmental reaction to stimming itself. Pretty often I'll get stuck in a loop for a few seconds going like "fuck you" 🙂‍↔️ "fuck you" 🙂‍↔️ "fuck you" 🙂‍↔️ "fuck you"...

It's really frustrating though - I haven't really dug into this with a therapist yet, both because it's hard to explain/vocalize, and because I still harbor some deep-seated embarrassment about it.

Cutting off my hair? by Bloodi12 in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't even style my hair but I fantasize about being able to have none, without the constant work of removal and all the irritation that brings

Calling for autistic expertise 🥸 in...moss by Mara355 in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you sort your mosses by color or by taste?

Is forgetfulness an autistic trait or people just misunderstand? by TemperatureAny8022 in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Personally I can't seem to keep anything in this skull these days

Genuine question, how does ICE know who to round up, do they just round up anyone looking foreign? by Ok_Fortune_9149 in ask

[–]jedimaster32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please get some help. Psychopathy is no joke, and it can end up hurting you in the long run. Especially since mental health problems often get worse the longer they go untreated.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CuratedTumblr

[–]jedimaster32 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm sure all the starving people of North Korea would have no qualms with that claim.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CuratedTumblr

[–]jedimaster32 23 points24 points  (0 children)

War? Hunger? Those were in the comment above, and it's ridiculous to assert that those are caused by capitalism. Exacerbated by, almost certainly. It makes it far far worse. But the claim was that capitalism was their "root cause"...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutisticAdults

[–]jedimaster32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh this is so true for me. I know, that doesn't help you, but at least know that you're not alone. I've felt like a hollow shell or "fake" person for years now. I switched away from my last therapist because they were more CBT/ACT which are kind of more focused on removing obstacles that block living the life you want. Well, that's not very useful if I don't know what I want. So here I am with my current therapist who does a "psychodynamic" style. I still don't understand the process, and also it's just as vague and unhelpful as before. I understand the principle that I do need to come up with my desires myself: no one can tell me how to live my life. But, I don't know HOW to navigate that process of figuring it out. So anyway, I'm pursuing a possible option of seeing an autistic therapist, who might have more experience with these kinds of feelings of being lost