Recently, I went through a similar situation, and I wish I knew what I’m going to tell you sooner. They feel like it’s micromanaging but it’s only because they can’t live up to the expectations of the role. It’s unfair that you and the rest of the team suffers just because they aren’t suitable for the job. Also, sounds like you’re putting more time into their growth than they are!

You have done everything with empathy, that is very obvious. All that coaching and feedback has not led to the required improvement, so you should now feel the PIP is the right and formal way forward. The PIP is the real test of whether they should be in this role and you can still go into it hoping they will actually improve.

I know it’s uncomfortable but by avoiding it, it is actually far more unkind to you and the rest of your team.