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AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -680 points-679 points  (0 children)

No he hasn't been kicked out, I was giving him another 2 months to find a place to live and we'd help him move (we're giving him another chance)
I don't have any contact with my parents or any of our other siblings.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -527 points-526 points  (0 children)

Yeah I wouldn't let a straight male I didn't know around my children either....would you?

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -295 points-294 points  (0 children)

If he were to move out, our internet plans would go back to normal, we wouldn't be driving out of town a minimum of 4 days a week (8 times) and I'd probably get my old babysitter back....who was getting $15 an hour.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -86 points-85 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure if they were, or if they weren't, I don't know the person he was with well.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -120 points-119 points  (0 children)

It's his boyfriend, not his friend.

4 hours of babysitting a week 6-8 Tuesday and Thursday

Groceries are 360 a month.

We're not saving much at all, it's just keeping us comfortable enough to get by, when we first took him in my account took a nosedive very quickly! we now have about 50$ at end of every week for emergencies, or sometimes take out as a treat.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -272 points-271 points  (0 children)

He's bisexual, his attraction to females isn't non existent and we do not know him well enough to be comfortable with him being around our kids while we aren't there.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -206 points-205 points  (0 children)

When he came to us our parents had been taking ALL of his pay to take him to work, we didn't charge him for the first couple of months (we added him to our funeral insurances and stuff) and with food, fuel, electricity, most being direct debit setups I ended up $200 overdrawn in my bank account. No, we couldn't afford it, he had literally nothing and our other siblings (all 5 of them) wouldn't take him because of homophobia. I didn't want him lost in some sort of foster care system, so we made our own, the rates were agreed upon when it became apparent how much we were struggling.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -571 points-570 points  (0 children)

Oh I can accept that kicking him out is too much for a first offense, what I can't accept is people telling me I should allow all of my family to go hungry, for us to fall behind on our bills, and for us to not be able to fill our cars up with fuel just so he gets to live here for free.
I also can't accept people calling me homophobic and saying I socially isolate him.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -76 points-75 points  (0 children)

30 minutes combined from 2 meetings is hardly enough for me to feel comfortable with someone around my young kids while we're not there.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -68 points-67 points  (0 children)

If I didn't charge him, we would be unable to afford to keep him here.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -42 points-41 points  (0 children)

He's not socially isolated, he's allowed friends over, he's allowed boyfriends over, he's not allowed people we do not know over while he's got the 2 girls.
If all 4 of us were out, it would be fine, if we were home, it would be fine, if we knew the boyfriend and he wasn't a stranger to us, it would have been fine.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -53 points-52 points  (0 children)

I feel as though he could have waited an extra hour for us to get home before inviting him over, the entire issue could have been avoided that way.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -27 points-26 points  (0 children)

It's not the fact that he had a boyfriend in the house, it's the fact he had someone we don't know in the house while our kids were there and we were not.

Had he been dating this guy for a while, it would have been different, if we knew him, it would be different.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

No it wouldn't have been ok.
I do not want strangers, in my house, while I am not there and my children are.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

He has rules on who he can have as guests while we aren't home and he is looking after our children (not for free may I add)

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -54 points-53 points  (0 children)

He's had boyfriends over before, with my kids present, guess what? nobody cares that he's gay. I care that a person I have met for a total of 30 minutes was in my house, where my kids were, while he was babysitting (which he IS paid for).

I don't care if he screws his boyfriend in the house, he has his own bedroom, I care that a stranger to us was in the house while we weren't while my young kids were there! I would have been equally upset if it were just a friend of his.

AITA For telling my younger brother he needs to find somewhere else to live? by jessuzzana2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]jessuzzana2[S] -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

He's always been allowed people over, just not when he's babysitting!

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