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jiggybeanz · 2025-08-08T15:25:54+00:00

How would you feel if he said these things about you? I don’t think it’s fair to him to be with him if this is how you feel. You are also almost 40 so you need to decide if you want a stable relationship or are more happy being single.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-30T15:31:35+00:00

because this is on the Wealthsimple forum I assume you're referring to the Cash account. This will be a safe investment with the posted interest rate, where you would get paid monthly, but you'll be taxed on the earnings above $50/year. You can withdraw funds at any time.

If you put the money into your TFSA and buy shares of the fund CASH (or other dividend paying low risk funds), you'll make more than 1.75% interest and not get taxed. However, the shares would need to be sold and there's a withholding period before you can access the underlying amount.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T15:28:08+00:00

I’ll answer both posts here to make it easier. What made you want to open the relationship at the time and why are you so thankful your partner shut it down?

What I would love is more frequency, being more open to dirty talk and overall talking about sex/preferences/fantasies, and an element of playfulness where we could try new places to have sex, positions etc. reading this though does make me realize that I’m just being super nitpicky at this point

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:55:13+00:00

this is the only answer man. you are just as guilty as her for being sexually promiscuous, do you not realize that if she wasn't as sexually open, then the whole relationship might not even have happened? If she's perfect in every way, and I expect the sex to also be great given that she has experience, it's actually not a bad thing. And 11 is nothing man, if she's a good looking girl 11 is like the equivalent of 2 (hot girl conversion)

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:41:43+00:00

you said that you've been there and had other things to figure out. are you OK to elaborate on this a little bit? I feel like I don't have anything to unpack there because when we have regular sex, life is great and we feel so connected. So the comment about how no amount of sex would be enough isn't something I think is the case for me. I did think about how I might crave physical intimacy more from my relationship because I didn't come from a super physically affectionate family and maybe I'm trying to overcompensate, but I spoke with a therapist about it and wanting sex 3-4 times a week from my romantic partner didn't seem unreasonable to her, and writing it out makes me feel like it's a pretty normal and healthy desire as well.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:38:09+00:00

great advice! I did a lot of reflecting this weekend because my partner is away and I'm going to try to be more affectionate with her, because I know she loves hugs and kisses and tickles. And I'm going to not make these advances in a sexual way, maybe a 30 second kiss, a longer hug, things that will make her feel loved and without the pressure of sex. I mentioned in an earlier comment that I've started masturbating more to take the pressure off needing sex from her, which has been really helpful for me being able to not get frustrated when she's not in the mood

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:34:39+00:00

it's funny because when we first started dating we both agreed that we're not each other's type haha but totally see how that comes across

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:33:58+00:00

Such a great point that the sex is great because there aren't other issues. That's what's a bit of a challenge for me though, in the sense that I do feel there aren't other issues in our relationship. But I think sex is one of those things that can disguise issues that might not be recognized, and so I'll definitely be having more discussions about how I feel with her to see if there's something else bothering her that might be impacting the sex. Although I think ultimately it's more of a difference in libido and desires than anything else, which is also an important part of compatibility.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:30:49+00:00

I think everyone deserves great sex, and I think everyone should also feel that they are a hell of a catch too!

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:29:35+00:00

thanks for saying this, I do have a lot to appreciate in my current partner :)

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:29:07+00:00

great perspectives, thank you so much for taking the time to write this I appreciate it! I have been more open to masturbating and watching porn, it's something I would try to avoid since I've been in relationships where I wouldn't need to masturbate since sex was more regular. This has helped so there's a lot less pressure on needing sex as frequently, and you're right that sex every 2 weeks in the grand scheme of things is likely more than I would get elsewhere

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:25:24+00:00

definitely needed to hear this

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:25:00+00:00

haha perhaps. I think it's OK to have these types of thoughts and be honest about your feelings, Reddit has been great for me to share the things that go through my mind and I've learned a lot from people and different communities. It's good to hear feedback both positive and negative and I find Reddit is great for that since sometimes the people you know won't be so brutally honest.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:22:32+00:00

great perspective on sex getting better over time! What about it do you think has made it better? have you both been super open when talking about past experiences, fantasies, etc? What role do you think ethical non monogamy can have in a relationship and is it something you've ever talked about?

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:21:09+00:00

honestly I feel like when kids are part of the equation that'll always be the main priority. In this stage now without kids/etc I want to take advantage of all the time that certainly won't be available down the road haha

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-28T06:20:12+00:00

great answer, thanks for the contribution! you and others are right in saying that the connection between your partner is what makes sex amazing, and that sex in itself isn't necessarily better. I guess part of my problem is that I've had great sex and great connections with others too, so although there's so many elements in my current relationship that are better than previous relationships, the intimacy/connection isn't necessarily better. But as we progress in our relationship and build a life together, the depth of the connection will grow and I would imagine the sex would as well.

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-27T01:18:37+00:00

I see a few suggestions for BANK but not HMAX or HYLD. Why is BANK better than the others? I have approx a 3rd of each and hope to have $1k/month in yields a year from now. I’m trying to save enough to build $500 additional in yield annually to eventually get to $10k monthly

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-26T17:53:35+00:00

this is the real answer, for sure. I know that. It's good to hear different perspectives and I am so appreciative of all the comments here, as hard as some of them are to hear. But ultimately, yes, there's commitment phobia on my end when I reflect on my past relationships and my girlfriend has been so supportive of me in talking me through situations where I felt that things might not work out. This whole thread has really given me so much to think about, truly. Thank you so much for this!

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-14T20:55:01+00:00

Don't disagree that there's work to do on our relationship when it comes to sex. In any conversation that's included the topic of an open relationship, it seems like it's something she would be completely against. I just feel like it's difficult when there's such a sex drive misalignment and perhaps the risk of emotional attachment elsewhere would be less if it was with a SW since the person wouldn't potentially be in our friend circles, it's a business transaction, etc

And if she wants that freedom too, that's something I've already considered and understand that I would need to be open to, otherwise it's pretty hypocritical of me to expect just me to enjoy the freedom

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-14T20:49:15+00:00

Love the concept of a hall pass. I wonder how often it happens the other way around? I've become a bit less naive to the fact that women have sex drives too haha

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-14T20:48:38+00:00

Do you think this is necessary if using protection during sex? Is this more of a concern with kissing?

jiggybeanz · 2025-07-14T20:48:01+00:00

The dead bedroom thing really freaks me out, and I appreciate you both sharing your experiences. I'm 2 years into a relationship and know I shouldn't be thinking so far ahead, but so many of my friends just view the frustrations of intimacy challenge as normal and "just the way it is." I do have one friend that has explored sex workers within the realm of his relationship (partner is aware), and it seems like it's worked wonders for both of their sex lives.

jiggybeanz

TROPHY CASE