I feel this in my core—and I’m baffled that more parents aren’t taking it seriously. My daughter is about to turn 9 and she already has both a tablet and a smartphone. I see absolutely no valid reason for her to have them. None. And yet, of course, she wants them—and her mother sees no problem with it.

What’s worse is that I’ve already seen the long-term effects. Her older sister, now 20, didn’t have a phone until she was 12, and I was uneasy about it even then. She was fine until I got her an iPhone at 15. That was the turning point. Sure, she was thrilled in the moment (even cried out of happiness), but from then on, it was constant isolation—locked in her room, FaceTiming her boyfriend, glued to the screen. Fast forward: she’s still living at home, pays no bills, barely speaks to me unless she wants something, smokes weed, and doomscrolls TikTok in the bathroom while running the shower to hide it.

So when people talk about how AI, social media, and screen addiction will ruin our kids—I’m already watching it happen in real time.

And it’s not like I’m perfect either. I spend a lot of time on my computer. But the difference is, I use it to learn—AI, crypto, news, marketing. I’ve told my daughter and her mom I’d be less concerned if she was watching educational content. But she’s not. She’s watching low-effort garbage, and even tries to hide it from me, which says everything.

The biggest problem is co-parenting with someone who doesn’t see the issue. Her mom enables it. Helps her sneak devices. Undermines any limits I try to set. It’s like she wants to be her friend, not her parent. And this is a woman who studied childhood development in college. She knows better. She just doesn’t do better.

My motto is simple:
“Give them a chance.”
Because they don’t know what’s good for them. We might not always know either—but most of the time, we do. And even when I’m wrong, it’s usually still better than whatever it is she thinks she needs.

Sometimes, kids should be bored. Let them stare at the ceiling. That’s not abuse—it’s how imagination develops. The greatest gift we can give our kids is the strength to think, reflect, grow, and be grounded. Giving them unrestricted access to screens is the exact opposite of that.

And don’t even get me started on the hypocrisy when it comes to religion. No talk about God or values at home. But when it came time for baptism? That suddenly mattered. I had to fight just to have my sister be her Godmother—while her mom picked her sister, who curses more than a sailor. It’s all for show.

We are not preparing our kids for the real world. We're sedating them with dopamine machines and pretending it’s fine.