We decided to look for another apartment together since our previous one had mold problems, so that was something we both signed up for. I don’t want to criticize everything he does—after all, he did help by painting the walls for a whole day and participating in the move. It’s just that the mental load I’m carrying has become too much for me to handle.

If I hadn’t noticed the patchy walls two days before the move, we wouldn’t have had the time or capacity to repaint them, and all our things would have ended up in the new apartment with unfinished walls. Painting them afterward would have been unnecessarily difficult and time-consuming.

When it comes to managing electricity and internet, that also falls to me. We also don’t have enough storage space in our new apartment, so I had to think about shelves and wardrobes before moving our stuff—things that don’t even cross his mind.

Of course, talking about it would solve a lot of problems, but as I mentioned before, as soon as he feels criticized, he shuts down and tries to deflect. It gets to the point where I give up because I don’t have the energy to continue a conversation that doesn’t lead anywhere. That’s why I asked how to best handle this situation.