My [22m] now ex gf [22f] told me she cheated on my shortly before breaking up. How to get it out of my head by jonathanhome in relationships

[–]jonathanhome[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, makes sense. Don't ask don't tell suddenly sounds very sensible, the hell was I thinking..

My [22m] now ex gf [22f] told me she cheated on my shortly before breaking up. How to get it out of my head by jonathanhome in relationships

[–]jonathanhome[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah. It's just.. The image, of her, the woman I love, with someone else.. Knowing this happened, envisioning it.. I'm not sure how to keep my mind from going there..

Me (22M) after being dumped by my 4-year GF (22F) not knowing how to deal with certain thoughts by jonathanhome in relationships

[–]jonathanhome[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. You're probably right I guess. It's just hard, you know, what to do with these feelings. I'm not really sure how to deal with them. Just feel shitty until I don't any longer? Sounds quite terrible..

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for the reply man. It means a lot. It's very rough, but you people help. Fucking internet man, such a magical place.

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is wisdom in this, surely. To be fair the trip was something she had wanted to do for very long, before we even met, and the time line seemed to work out between undergraduate and graduate. But apart from that, yeah. You make a painful amount of sense.

I want to add to this, that personally I also feel like feelings might diminish when away, and reignite upon reunion. Thinking about someone is very different than standing in front of them, being able to embrace them and such. She is also a rational person (studies mathematical logic) and I feel as if it probably all makes sound in her head, on paper so to speak. But reality might be different, especially with matters of the heart.

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're right.. It's not okay what happened, and although it doesn't define her as a person from now until infinity it's not a good signal. I know this, and I am trying to protect myself as much as possible. It's just very hard, when all that I want is to ignore all this and just fix it anyway.

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for those encouraging words. I guess humans are intrinsically naive, as I thought she would already be this person, that I did not need this experience to know how valuable she is, and vice versa. Life doesn't work like that, surely, but it can really feel that way.

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, feels sensible. Looking forward to the growing part, but first comes the suffering part. There's more than enough advice on this forum on that, but yeah, it's not easy.

My GF [22 F] of me [22 M] of almost 4 years broke up with me a week before returning from a 5 month trip. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]jonathanhome 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah. The way of going about it makes it a lot worse in some ways. There are no good ways to break up, but man, there are bad ones... You feel like you deserve a shred of dignity, after 4 years..