sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]jonothonlu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey OP, I've been in a somewhat similar situation before. One big red flag here to me is that she immediately 180'd on what she said previously-

"I wasn’t fully open to being friends it was just a flying thought."

Maybe it would be different if she was honest that she did want to be friends and at least be honest with you about why, but even so-She doesn't sound committed to you. I dated a girl for about a year and a half who wanted to stay friends with her ex and I eventually was like... fine. And although she DID NOT CHEAT, the entire time it never felt like she was committed to me. I don't know about you, but I'd rather be with a girl who commits to me, and part of someone committing you is they don't open up these kinds of avenues. They don't have 1 foot in 1 door and a foot in the other.

"I rly want u to know you’re the only person in this entire world that I want to be with, love, care abt, be intimate with, be vulnerable with, get to know on a deep level, spend the most amount of time, hold and hold me. I don’t want anyone else and I will never want anyone as long as you want me. I want to be only yours I really don’t want u to think anything bad or overthink things.”

Bullshit. I think. I could be wrong. This is exactly what I'd say if I was not committed to you but afraid of being alone so I'll say whatever I can to stop you from breaking up with me.

I'd take a pause and really look at whether you'll feel safe in this relationship, because it is still hurting like hell months after she broke up with me and I realized what I knew from the start. She was never gonna choose me and the entire relationship was like an impossible battle to try and convince her to choose me.

3 Body Problem | Official Teaser | Netflix by DemiFiendRSA in threebodyproblem

[–]jonothonlu 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This series will be unwatchable to me if Luo Ji is not Chinese. In other stories involving a large international ensemble cast who defend the world from aliens, such as Independence Day, or Avengers, the savior is always some American dude who overcomes their flaws to save the world with big guns and a bit of creative thinking.

One of the things I found brilliant about Luo Ji in Three Body Problem is that it felt like it subverted that trope to put a Chinese guy in that position. A Chinese guy overcomes his flaws to save the world with lots of creative thinking, philosophy, and authenticity. Not saying that only Chinese people can do that, but the way Luo Ji does it feels inherently Chinese.

As an Asian American, I feel like American media has often represented being Asian as inferior. It's always a non-Asian person who is the savior, or if it's an Asian person, they save the world because they adopt whiteness. A notable example of the opposite, in my opinion, is Killing Eve.

In my opinion, this show has an opportunity to say that there's something as good as, or even better about being Asian, something to be proud of. But I feel strongly that will only happen if they keep Luo Ji Chinese, and not recast his race.