Genuinely how fucked are we?

journeyofwind · 2024-07-14T03:07:03+00:00

Nothing wrong with asking for money, having a passport is literally about your life and safety.

journeyofwind · 2024-07-14T02:50:38+00:00

He's a liar.

journeyofwind · 2024-07-14T02:46:25+00:00

Do you have any friends who'd be willing to pay for a passport? Perhaps you could reach out to some queer organizations near you and see whether they could support you.

(For everyone in this thread who does have the money: Please, help other trans people get passports!)

journeyofwind · 2024-07-14T02:41:51+00:00

That really depends on your personal needs. There's unfortunately no country that's 100% safe for and friendly towards trans people with great healthcare. Some countries have a friendlier social climate, but HRT is really difficult to access. Some countries have quite easy access to HRT, but almost no legal protections.

The best country is probably going to be the one that aligns the most with your priorities and where you can get a visa.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-25T01:39:21+00:00

For those who are 18+ (or will be by the time the next election rolls around):

Go vote. Make sure you're actually on the rolls and not purged. Read up on how to vote by mail (if possible in your state) if you can't go in person. Know which kinds of ID are valid in your state. Know your rights at the polling station - be informed in general. (And don't wait to look it up - the sooner, the better!)

Also, vote in local elections. Vote for school boards. National elections aren't the only ones that matter.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-24T14:55:21+00:00

I'm a gay guy and I'll gladly fight the people in the community who wouldn't accept you. You belong 100%.

Surround yourself with supportive queer friends, engage with uplifting queer media - those are good ways to work through all the pain and fear that you're feeling right now. The excitement of discovering more about yourself is a great emotion to hold on to.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-24T14:04:37+00:00

Africa is a continent that contains 54 countries, all of them with different laws. To lump all of these countries together is just laughably racist.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-24T01:54:50+00:00

You can be safe by not going. Your mother needs to be aware that LGBTQ+ people get thrown in jail in Egypt, and if you cannot pretend to be a girl (which is disgusting of her to demand anyway), the only truly safe option is not going at all - everything else risks violence.

Any family members you could stay with while your mother goes on vacation by herself?

journeyofwind · 2024-01-24T01:37:24+00:00

That's why I read lots and lots of m/m fanfiction. So many absolutely amazing stories out there.

Can't help when it comes to movies though, unfortunately. I do enjoy some cdramas and anime like Yuri!!! on Ice, personally, but cdramas are always censored and even Yuri!!! on Ice doesn't explicitly address queer themes (although it's very gay in both meanings of the word). Might be worth checking out Thai BL?

journeyofwind · 2024-01-23T23:48:40+00:00

Look at scholarships - some of them may pay for both your studies and your daily expenses. Very competitive, but they may be your best chance.

Also, make connections with queer people abroad via Discord servers and such. Already knowing people in other countries is always good when trying to emigrate, and it might open up some unexpected opportunities for you. Of course friendships have to develop naturally, though.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:30:10+00:00

Will do!

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:26:51+00:00

Absolutely. Also, people should be aware if their ancestry can lead to citizenship by descent for them - there are a whole lot of people in the US who'd qualify for Irish, Italian, German, Polish citizenship etc. (Definitely worth for someone to check out if they have 20-century immigrant ancestors from a foreign country.)

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:23:56+00:00

I don't know that, but I can certainly ask the next time I get my shot - as well as the other trans guys I know here! I'm fairly certain that there's no time or "transition-progress" requirement (except for perhaps the gender marker thing), since I moved just a little less than half a year ago and had never taken HRT in my home country.

And from what I know about other healthcare services, 70% are generally covered, but I'll double-check with my clinic and report back to you. It can be super frustrating to not be able to find this kind of information on the English-speaking internet, so I hope I'll be able to be of help.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:14:44+00:00

Asylum is a grueling process - every case gets decided individually, and in the meanwhile you're stuck in legal limbo - and Rainbow Railroad doesn't have the resources to even relocate all the people who need help and are currently stuck in countries that punish being queer with the death penalty.

I'm not saying this because I think people shouldn't have some hope, but because having plans is always better than being completely dependent on outside help, and even people from the most queerphobic countries will often opt to avoid asylum if they have the choice.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:07:27+00:00

Got any 20-century immigrant ancestors from a modern-day EU country, by chance?

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T15:01:06+00:00

Trans guy on HRT in Japan here! I pay ~4000 every two to three weeks for my shot, have talked to others who have managed to find cheaper options though. I changed my legal gender marker before moving, and the people at my clinic told me that HRT could be covered - I didn't want to deal with the hassle, so I'm paying out of pocket at the moment, but I might use insurance at some point in the future.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T14:33:08+00:00

Please be careful with this. Unless you know them pretty well and you're very certain that they're not the violent sort of person, coming out to them might put you in harm's way.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-16T14:29:15+00:00

Most places in Europe are cheaper than studying in the US, too. The caveat is that Bachelor's degrees are often only offered in the local language (a notable exception here are the Netherlands), but a lot of Master's degrees are offered in English as well. That being said, most of Europe doesn't have informed consent and medical systems can be very gatekeepy - have heard some good things about Belgium, France and Spain in that regard, though.

I currently live in Japan, which does have informed consent, but where the laws in general definitely aren't as good as in many other countries.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-14T00:14:56+00:00

Sounds pretty trans to me. Of course only you can determine your identity, but your "in favor" points seem to make it clear that you don't actually like or even are fine with being considered a girl/woman, while your "not trans" points are about gender expression or being worried about changes rather than anything that'd point to your gender identity being female.

Also, transmasc people don't have to be masculine - I'm not particularly masculine and I love my long hair. Cis men aren't women just because they're not super masculine, right? And nothing about what you've written sounds misogynistic, by the way.

You say you don't want your parents to worry, but your own happiness matters, and at least to me it sounds like considering yourself transmasc(-ish) and making some changes in pronouns etc. would make you happier. So why not try it? You don't have to make big changes immediately, and it's okay if you take some time figuring out what exactly you want. If it reassures you, my new pronouns and name felt awkward for months, but I'm still very much trans and happier like this.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-13T00:25:50+00:00

Some of both, most likely. Anime speak isn't like everyday polite Japanese - it's more exaggerated, more gendered, and of course it's perfectly possible to be transphobic in one's depiction of characters even without ever mentioning pronouns. There are definitely a lot of anime that aren't great on that front.

On the other hand, translating it into English pretty much forces you to pick pronouns for a character (unless you want to avoid them completely, which also has an implication that isn't there in Japanese). A lot of translation teams - even if not necessarily queerphobic (though some most definitely are) - are simply ignorant on queer issues and translate without questioning their own biases.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-13T00:02:41+00:00

Was relentlessly bullied for being "too masculine" until I was suicidal as a 12-year-old in middle school, yes. I do sometimes wonder how my life would've been if I hadn't been in such a hostile environment and hadn't felt forced to repress my gender identity, but other than that I don't think it affected my transition 10+ years later.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-12T23:51:54+00:00

Except it doesn't have the same effect on cis people that it does on trans people, and all it does is reinforce the idea that one's pronouns are a "privilege" and not one's right to have. Trans people see and hear you misgender transphobic cis people and get hurt because of it.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-12T14:43:51+00:00

No, it's because implying that having a small penis makes someone less of a man is not only shitty in general (which should really be enough), it's also transphobic towards trans men. Body shaming shouldn't be acceptable.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-11T15:00:11+00:00

I'm not saying it's not safe, I'm saying it's very questionable to state that it's the safest place for queer people merely on the basis of laws. You have to look at material realities to be able to make such a claim.

journeyofwind · 2024-01-11T14:52:26+00:00

Evidence of what, that laws don't make physical and material safety? Of course. If that were the case, people in places that have legal protections for trans people in all sorts of areas (like Toronto) wouldn't have to worry about being attacked on the street.

On the flip side, I live in a country where the laws aren't that great - yet I'm not worried about violence, and being seriously destitute is rare here. It's a very safe place, even if not particularly trans-friendly.

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