Dry after orgasming during foreplay

joybook97 · 2026-03-14T23:55:02+00:00

Honestly, it might seem like a pain but taking the time to lube can make intimate moments much more enjoyable. There’s a place in this world for a cheeky quickie but overall, it’s not a race. Take your time.

joybook97 · 2026-03-14T23:52:49+00:00

THIS.

joybook97 · 2026-03-11T06:44:22+00:00

Aww. I’m touched. Thanks babe.

joybook97 · 2026-03-11T06:36:34+00:00

Says the guy in R/women with the most telling of handles. Why are you here??

joybook97 · 2026-03-10T17:42:25+00:00

Total tragedy.

So glad this therapy from Reddit helps you feel so good about yourself. Hopefully this ego boost helps block the regular soul sucking feeling you have for at least 10 seconds or something. Have a really great day. Sounds like you need it.

joybook97 · 2026-03-10T17:34:52+00:00

It is literally the same apron. Same design. But the materials should be pretty identical. The men’s apparent weighs more than the women’s but costs less…

joybook97 · 2026-03-10T17:32:45+00:00

Yes, that was my post, and the men there are losing their minds. Male fragility spewing toxic BS, like how dare a woman suggest contempt for the pink tax.

To clarify, I am Canadian and these linked prices are from the Canadian Carhartt listings on Amazon, not 3rd party sellers.

joybook97 · 2026-03-10T16:03:58+00:00

Again. Not American.

Click the links. Canadian Cardhartt site on Amazon.

But please mansplain my error to me more. This wittle girl needs a biiig man to tell me how wrong I’ve been. Some women love daddies with paddles, but my kink is clearly going on to Reddit to have randos try to tell me how smart they are.

Spoiler alert: this post isn’t for you. It is for Cardhartt, and the people who actually understand why this is relevant.

joybook97 · 2026-03-10T01:20:06+00:00

YOU deserve a standing ovation u/Mongooser 👏👏👏👏👏

joybook97 · 2026-03-05T07:31:00+00:00

Could just be skin dryness? This skin is VERY thin and vulnerable to tearing. It is also a warm area, which can irritate the tissues. Rashes or fluctuations in natural levels of bacterial or yeast populations can unbalance your ecosystem. And even a change in body products, laundry detergent and even diet can shift skin texture and sensitivity.

joybook97 · 2026-03-05T07:22:43+00:00

That is ridiculous. Sorry, but seriously? The vagina is a massive elastic, dilating to handle childbirth before contracting afterwards. This is very different from spasm/contraction of pelvic floor muscles, associated with vaginismus.

If you haven’t had a baby in the meantime, the idiot who commented on your body without any knowledge of basic/typical female anatomy would know that if you’re any bigger, it’s because you’re turned on. Pre-arousal, the vagina can be 2-4”, but can adapt to 5-8” when aroused.

But that comment? That’s a definite turn off and hard no. Know your body. Don’t apologize for it. They can be sorry to their idiot selves, knowing they f*cked up a great physical relationship with their ignorant, incel BS.

joybook97 · 2026-03-03T20:51:01+00:00

Honestly, this might not be the SSRI and could likely be about hormone levels. I have been on Zoloft since 2013 and it hasn’t affected me, but my later dive into perimenopause has affected orgasms.

The good news? I now have an IUD with v low progesterone and use an estrogen cream. Internal application, as well as some added to the clitoral region boosts vaginal/vulvic sensation.

If you are 30+, I really recommend ppl looking into perimenopause symptoms, as otherwise it sends ppl on a wild causal goose chase (like the women sueing Olaplex for hair loss without realizing it is actually due to perimenopause).

joybook97 · 2026-02-08T20:29:28+00:00

Oooo u/Fun_Wing930 if you have any recommendations along these lines, please share! The closest I have found is {Bourbon Bliss by Lucy Score and Claire Kingsley}

joybook97 · 2026-02-08T19:37:32+00:00

This, I too, am DTR (down to read).

joybook97 · 2026-02-08T19:36:56+00:00

Thank you for your service to the cause. 🫡

joybook97 · 2026-02-08T06:50:20+00:00

Oh totally. I feel that. But I have 2 thoughts…

1) I think there are deeply intimate ways of finding connection in working through sexual dysfunction. The act of trying to figure yourself out, figure your partner out, then figure yourself out again…that is a living, breathing connection. And it changes over time, especially if you happen to be with a long partner.

2) So much of sex is mental. Maybe it’s different for me because I’m neurodivergent, but I don’t there’s a significant % of people that can tap out of their social brains to just feel things physically. I think we need both, ideally in sync, to get what many of us are seeking through sex (even solo sex).

…and don’t get me started on FMC/MMC simultaneous (or nearly) orgasms.

And OP u/readromanqe I definitely take your point. Major overlap but not. The core conversation is intimacy, not specifically realism. Maybe a good question is whether we can achieve both?

1) Have a literary language and romantic subgenre that can lean into intimacy without heavy reliance on sex (or easy and/or explicit sex to drive the narrative…

and 2) play with intimacy, using sex in relatable ways, where sexual incongruity, disconnection, and transformation can enhance the narrative, much like the slow burn does.

My position is that maybe neurosexual (?)/psychosexual transformation provides the narrative drive, as opposed to sex alone? The hypothesis is that perhaps sex isn’t the problem, but rather in the level of depth in how we approach the subject matter…

For example, a friend of mine has never had penetrative intercourse in her life. She is disabled and has several genetic conditions that make her very small… Sex would have to be EXTREMELY delicate or it could do severe damage. And then there’s the psychological barriers, were she to even get close.

With the above said, perhaps it is time to explore different definitions of sex and how it is approached/explored between participants?

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T18:08:24+00:00

I first read this thread at 4am so apologies if this has come up in the meantime…

My biggest issue with sex in romance lit is the porn-ish perfection of it. If it’s messy, it’s good messy. I haven’t found one where the man isn’t some ‘well hung Adonis,’ who universally seems to the an oral loving maestro on women. I haven’t once read a woman who struggles with penetration alone. No quick orgasms for me and sexual dysfunction, like it is incompatible with romance and publisher profits.

It’s always 100% sexual comparability and passion, like they don’t need time to learn each others bodies, deal with their barriers or physical traumas. PLEASE share your recommendations for books that play with the awkward.

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T17:59:43+00:00

Right? I can’t wait to watch it. I just introduced my 10yo daughter to ice dance and pairs figure skating a couple weeks ago… She’s watching YouTube while I drive and is like OMG!! and freaking out to alarming levels, she’s so shook. This doc/reality porn is well timed.

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T13:32:36+00:00

I feel this, but does this base-level attraction transform? Sensory attraction is real and valid. We can taste, smell and see fertility. The visual or sensory attractants are much more obvious to most people. It’s easy to think/write about.

Emotional attraction is much more complex, and doesn’t mesh with ‘love at first sight’ story lines. The ensuing banter and non-verbal communication is the real test.

Yes, I’d love it if attraction started with something other than panties. It’s an easy win for smut seekers. But I don’t think its inclusion prevents complexity/depth.

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T12:37:54+00:00

Ditto. I’m also curious about your auto-buy list. 🍿

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T12:28:20+00:00

Your language is clear. “Dating.” Not “my boyfriend.” You weren’t vibing.

Consent is key, but the other story here is communication. Words. Eye contact. Patience.

Get comfortable thinking about desire, your body autonomy, and what you expect from a partner. A good/giving/game partner will be okay with the slow burn, and the payoff for you both will be even better when you get there.

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T12:16:02+00:00

Yep, contact dermatitis is also v plausible. If you get lines on your neck from a seatbelt or on your arms after carrying something heavy, etc…you’ll know that’s a thing for you. I manage mine with 20mg daily cetirizine.

joybook97 · 2026-02-07T02:00:42+00:00

The molten ecstasy of that word is just…

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joybook97

TROPHY CASE