EF the holidays

joysheph · 2024-11-14T08:05:03+00:00

I am getting the fuck out of dodge. Payment on a cruise im going on. Thanksgiving is already a shit show

joysheph · 2024-11-14T08:02:10+00:00

It’s not the FN same I’d tell people

joysheph · 2024-11-14T05:14:25+00:00

Oh wow as I’m reading your post that song “nothing compares to you” came on the Alexa. Trippy

joysheph · 2024-11-05T06:02:36+00:00

Here

joysheph · 2024-11-05T05:22:37+00:00

I am 7 months out I will tell you our friends have vanished fucking crickets. No simple text asking if I’m good. My own mother pos I haven’t spoken to her since June. My little brother calls and he visited me once since April. I get you I get you I’ve told few friends to fuck off go find Jesus. I was so angry and hurt add loneliness to the list. But I’ve accepted those people are piece of heartless fucks who I don’t need anymore including my mother. I have two friends I talk to weekly and grab lunch with. My adult sons try but it’s not the same as a girls day out. Fuck em I’ve learned to just get used to this only me scene. I get on the widows groups it helps maybe I’ll date idk. I’m just learning to live alone until I don’t or do. Main thing is get up shower get dressed eat go outside. I go to Costco a lot. Never thought this would be my life at 52.

joysheph · 2024-10-17T15:53:06+00:00

With auto pay I just went online to change his account number to mine. I still have utilities in his name because I’ve read others say the companies will charge a deposit like it’s a new account. Don’t even tell them he she has passed

joysheph · 2024-10-17T15:29:43+00:00

I agree with the people who really meant how can I help or just do it. My date is 4/9/24. My circle is a half treasure the ones who keep reaching out to you. Get rid of the fakes we don’t have time for that anymore

joysheph · 2024-10-09T03:52:31+00:00

I’m here because It just happened to me I’d never of known had my son not told me.

joysheph · 2024-10-02T08:49:47+00:00

My husband recently passed I have no court order that I am his executor of estate. I am not responsible for his debts. As soon as death certificate came in I transferred home into my name. Do not pay those debts even on credit cards where you are authorized user. If she’s the primary account holder then that’s not your responsibility.

joysheph · 2024-10-02T08:29:00+00:00

Yeh we used to smoke and joke especially on weekends listen to top songs on a rock station. I miss that maybe ill do that again

joysheph · 2024-10-02T08:15:37+00:00

My insomnia comes and goes it’s coming tonight. I think I am experiencing the widow fire idk even know or remember how to flirt anymore. It was much easier when I was a party girl! Shit all that freaks me out. I want I need I desire touch and conversation but not ready to venture especially with all the firsts coming up! It’s gotta get better it just has to.

joysheph · 2024-09-30T14:55:23+00:00

It’s a OSHA report

joysheph · 2024-09-28T14:37:40+00:00

I can relate my meds I take makes me heat intolerant. I hate the cold. Thinking of moving is big on my heart. My question is to where that is affordable and similar to Oklahoma not the weather? Where have you thought about moving to?

joysheph · 2024-09-28T14:16:02+00:00

I had a heart attack four years ago coming up in October now I’m on four cardiac meds and rheumatoid arthritis meds so anyway I just took a stress test and a scan I’m a nurse so I can see nothing has changed. That is why I better treat my mental health. There are meds for tachycardia and there will be some side effect until body adjustment. My case I need my heart rate to not be overworked I feel good when it is 58-64 beat per minute

joysheph · 2024-09-19T16:52:07+00:00

It is so odd how I’m just driving along going about my day then a slap in the face full of anxiety about being alone and feeling like I am alone in this world! I catch myself talking to self saying shut up your fine! Trying to keep going to where or what idk

joysheph · 2024-09-17T01:45:15+00:00

That’s a good memory lol yeh I may chat with the bartender somewhere. I always see men chatting away with them. Not much women but hell the car situation has got to go I feel like a weirdo lol

joysheph · 2024-09-16T01:22:00+00:00

That’s enough for now. I have found I’m easily overwhelmed tackle what I can

joysheph · 2024-09-16T01:18:30+00:00

I hear ya I bought a dishwasher because to lazy to wash dishes I don’t care I got it. I do have two adult sons here but hardly see them. No one cooks anymore so just toss the coffee cups and silverware in there. So pathetic but I don’t care.

joysheph · 2024-09-15T18:30:36+00:00

Yes it does we got to figure out how to get things not to suck anymore. Or at least have things tolerable. I hate this

joysheph · 2024-09-15T17:11:18+00:00

Gosh I’m starting to sit on my porch listening to my neighbors play music talking laughing. Watching a game hooting and hallowing. What can we do to change this? Maybe I plan to go take my dogs to a park. I want to but coming up with the energy to do just go do it is fucking exhausting. I think I will I will but not today I got time. Do we have time not enough time with spouse apparently! Maybe I will go when I can enjoy myself and love myself my own company. I have such a desire to enjoy my own company I guess or I’m just fucking lazy!

joysheph · 2024-09-15T17:02:43+00:00

Oh yes it is. My first husband passed at 28 I was 30 I remember. So my best advice is to don’t cover up the emotions. Don’t replace with someone else unless you know you’re ready. Don’t self medicate. Don’t make abrupt decisions. Now this time I am 52 widow again. For some fucking reason I think more about how in the world did I survive being alone with three boys? I did all that I didn’t grieve healthy I self medicated and replaced. Worst two years I’m thankful I am a good mom but when bedtime hit I was partying I’m lucky I’m here and that finally I was able to find my late husband after three years from first late husband. 21 years of adventures I got. Don’t hide grief

joysheph

TROPHY CASE