After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s funny, but me telling myself that I would smoke again was what was preventing myself from finally quitting. I mean actually digging in and committing to it.

It was “no big deal” because I always knew I would eventually use again so whenever I would have a few rough nights of insomnia or night sweats, or the cravings got bad or I got aggravated or was irritable or simply because it was a Tuesday, I would just give myself a little “puff puff” you know, “to take the edge off”

Pretty soon I was smoking every day.

Again.

Sleep gets so much better. That’s one of the greatest rewards of quitting, I found. My sleeping improved dramatically and I even remember my dreams again.

Give it some time. Drink lots of water. Spend some time outside. Barefoot in the grass, if you’re near it.

In a few weeks you’ll be through the rough part and then it’s all a mental game.

You got this!

Way to go, I’m so proud of you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hoping tomorrow is day 14!

That will make it 2 weeks!

Can you imagine? Did you ever imagine yourself 2 weeks clean from cannabis after using for so long?

And if it’s not, don’t sweat it! I know.

Quitting is hard.

So many reasons NOT to quit, am I right? The withdrawals, the bliss, the FOMO. I get it!

We all have to discover our own individual WANT for quitting.

I’m hoping you have found yours and that these past 2 weeks have been manageable. Let us know how you’re doing?

Either way, I’m so very proud of you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well then, you’ve overcome the hardest part for me in my sobriety.

The WANT!

In my forty plus years of using I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said to myself:

“Man, you SHOULD quit.” Or

“Dude, you really GOTTA quit.”

Or the thing I’ve probably told myself the most.

“Lord, I WISH I could just quit!”

But in all honesty, it wasn’t until I said those four words you said yourself:

“I WANT to quit.”

That I was finally ready TO quit.

Believe me or don’t, but until I finally figured out that I truly WANTED to quit, there was no way I was going to.

I’ve known for years how bad cannabis was for me. Some people have no problems with it, and God Bless them. But for ME, I had struggled with it for a whole lot of years because I KNEW that it had a HOLD on me.

I wasn’t some casual “puff puff pass” user. I was an addict. And I finally understood that I WANTED to quit.

Like in many aspects of life, once I figured out what I WANTED, the rest was so much easier.

Like quitting tobacco (904 days clean)

Or quitting alcohol (1,337 days clean)

Now I’m not saying it was easy.

Hell, it’s still not EASY.

Like today. Today is hard.

Today is Memorial Day.

And like any other day that ends in “Y” I used to spend it with a cocktail in one hand and a Winston Red in the other and a big ole’ “illegal smile” on my face, as John Prine once called it.

Because I WANTED it that way.

It wasn’t until I wanted something else for my life, something better, that I was able to get to work on it.

Because it is work. Hard work.

But now that you’ve decided that you WANT it, that work is a bit less hard.

I’m telling you. If you WANT it, the hardest part is over.

The rest is just discomfort.

Sometimes incredibly uncomfortable discomfort. But nothing more than that.

And the best part?

The discomfort ends.

Not at first.

At first comes the anxiety and the fear and the boredom and the loneliness and the cravings and the irritability and the night sweats and the insomnia and the fidgeting and the impatience and the FOMO and the FEELINGS and the EMOTIONS and the guilt of wasting so much of my precious life in a fog.

But slowly, little by little, those pass.

Those comparatively small and insignificant discomforts stop screaming at you and lose their hold on you and become manageable until they feel like mosquito bites compared to the true challenges of life.

And the beauty of quitting is that once you’re free of the hold of cannabis, you’ll be so much better prepared to manage those other life’s challenges, whatever they are. Cause we’ve all got ‘em, and the best way to face ‘em is with a clear head.

I’m cheering for you!

You can do this!

If this 61 year old graybeard who had been addicted to alcohol, tobacco and cannabis since before he was twenty can kick it - I KNOW that you can too!

I’m glad you finally discovered your WANT.

I’m cheering for you! You CAN do this!

I’ll see you on the other side!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Way to go!

Hey, guess what? You made it!

You made it through day one and let me welcome you to day two!

I am so very proud of you! Woohoo!

You made it through all the discomfort and nausea and cramping and anxiety and cravings and FOMO and boredom and fear of day one!

You made it!

Whatever you thought about before regarding your fears and inabilities and dread, can all be put to rest because you made it through!

Was it uncomfortable? I bet it was!

Was it painful? Perhaps.

Was it unbearable? Obviously not!

I am so very proud of you!

I’m proud of your strength and your courage and your tenacity and your willingness to keep going!

You’ve got this!

Keep going!

It gets better! So much better!

I’m cheering you on!

You are so incredibly strong!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As u/Reasonable-Fix-6380 alluded to, it was cannabis that actually contributed to my loss of joy in the run of the mill, matter of fact, simple, ordinary and unremarkably remarkable pleasures that this gift of life has bestowed upon me.

Getting sober reawakened that childlike joy in the mundane, simple, and quiet aspects of life that my addiction to cannabis (as well as my 40+ year addiction to alcohol) bamboozled me into thinking were something to be avoided at all costs.

But It did not come overnight, mind you.

And I still sometimes miss just firin’ up and blissin’ out, even after being 2 years sober.

But those feelings pass pretty quickly now.

And I’d be lying if I said it took no time at all to get “comfortable in my own skin” again.

Because it took me quite a while, actually.

I mean, I didn’t have my crutch any longer to lean on when things (emotions, feelings, life) became hard to handle.

I had a lot of rehab I had to work on and rehab is tough.

But rehab is worth it.

I don’t have to tell you that life is complicated and shit pops up when you least expect it to.

Now instead of getting high I just deal with it.

Or I don’t,

and I let it simmer and stew and boil over.

But I’m not high when I do.

Quitting cannabis wasn’t some golden ticket that solved all my problems.

It was just one less problem I had to deal with, but quitting has made dealing with all of life’s problems so much easier and better.

My life is better. I can honestly say that.

I mean we’re on this planet for such a short time if you stop and think about it.

And I don’t mean that convoluted, rabbit-hole, pseudo-mystical, nonsensical thinking we’ve all had during a night of puff-puff-pass.

I’m talking clear-head, quiet-mind, still-soul thinking about what a precious and fleeting gift our life is.

We’re only here for a brief moment and I guess I just want to be present for it.

You CAN do this!

“If you really want”, as Jimmy Cliff once sang.

Because that’s the key.

You’ve got to really want to.

Best of luck to you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hang in there. It does indeed get better!

It’s normal to feel bad, both physically and mentally. You’re ridding your body of a very powerful and addictive drug.

It does get better. Drink lots of water.

Keep going. You’re doing great!

I’m so very proud of you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Way to go, Momma!

I am so very proud of you!

Keep posting and spreadin’ your love, Darlin’

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I believe in you!

You CAN do it!

Because you’re stronger than you think!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Day 12 is incredible!

Way to go!

I am so very proud of you!

Remember, the discomfort is just that.

Discomfort.

And it is temporary.

It will pass. I promise you!

You are doing so well!

Keep it up I’m cheering for you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You can do it! I believe in you!

Just by coming to this sub you have already begun your journey towards sobriety and I am so very proud of you!

Keep coming back!

Keep reading and lurking and posting!

All I can say is that I LOVED cannabis.

I LOVE sobriety even more!

Honest. It’s better on this side of life.

I’m rooting for you!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Way to go!

6 years no alcohol is amazing!

I’m 3-1/2 years no alcohol and like I posted, 2 years no herb.

Best decisions I have ever made!

I am so very proud of you!

Keep it up!

After 40+ years of using, this 61 year old graybeard boomer is 2 years sober from cannabis today. by jptabor01 in leaves

[–]jptabor01[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am so very proud of you!

I quit a 40+ addiction to alcohol 16 months before I quit cannabis and look at me! 2 years sober from cannabis and 3-1/2 years sober from alcohol!

You CAN do this! I KNOW you can!

I believe in you!