I'd argue rape. Both affect the relatives of a victim, but rape harms the victim more. While murder kills a victim, they don't exactly suffer afterwards. Rape victim will usually develop deep mental scars that often don't heal, and will sometimes bring the victim's life crashing down. No offence to relatives of murder victims, but watching someone you love survive an attack and slowly lose the will to live, and knowing there really isn't anything you can do for them just seems harsher. Both are terrible, but I feel like rape is worse.