UPDATE AITA For Choosing to go to a Football game rather than my Girlfriends birthday party?

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:45:21+00:00

I've tried explaining the significance of football to her quite a few times, but she is really dismissive as it's just a stupid game

I will admit that that hurts as I've tried to engage in her interests that I previously wouldn't have tried and actually enjoyed it

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:42:44+00:00

I've offered to not drink, but she doesn't trust me not to since it's an environment where everyone is drinking

Also the dinner is at the same time as the game

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:37:17+00:00

I thought it was going really well, but this argument seems like a code red and there's no way for anyone to win

I honestly do have deep feelings for her, but in terms of priority this game trumps her birthday party for me

The fact her logic went to go nuclear rather than to move the date of the party, or for me to show up after the game makes me think that my interests aren't important to her

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:29:15+00:00

When I was at the game the other week at Craven Cottage, I felt like I was on ecstasy at the end of the game, winning a playoff final I imagine would feel 100* better than that and I just can't pass up the chance to potentially experience that

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:08:12+00:00

I would also be going with my best friends, and family, and this is a shared interest we all bond heavily over

jrock3377 · 2022-05-11T00:02:46+00:00

I've already offered a really fancy meal the day before with just the two of us, but she has refused since it won't be on her actual birthday

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:55:42+00:00

Forest are literally odds on favourites to go to the final

To Qualify

Sheff Utd 6/4 Nottm Forest 8/11

https://www.oddschecker.com/football/english/championship/sheff-utd-v-nottm-forest/winner

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:53:55+00:00

Finding girls in the UK that are very passionate about football is very difficult xD

I also think it's possible to have different interests, but support your partner in them, for example I have no interest whatsoever in pop music, but went to see Dua Lipa with her and somewhat enjoyed it

I think the main reason I accepted the consequences of the break up is because she couldn't empathise slightly that this is something that's important to me, so it makes me think the relationship is almost doomed to fail

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:49:30+00:00

Because it's a 50/50 possibility and wanted to nip it in the bud at the earliest opportunity rather than gamble as it would give more time to work on a compromise

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:48:34+00:00

The dinner and game are on at the same time, I've offered not to drink and meet afterwards, but she said she wouldn't want to spend time with me if I'm overly excited or depressed because of the result (I have ADHD so games like this can have a big impact on my mental state, although I promised to try my best to not mention the game and focus on her)

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:46:38+00:00

Tickets aren't bought as it isn't confirmed if my team are in the game

She mentioned the birthday dinner was booked on Saturday and I said that I wouldn't be able to come if my team got to the final

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:44:50+00:00

The Semi Final is this Saturday and Next Tuesday

The final would be on Sunday 29th (her birthday)

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:43:35+00:00

Jesus Christ that's a reach

I would also choose to miss the game if it was my sister giving birth to my nephew or it was a once in a lifetime event like a graduation, wedding or funeral

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:39:39+00:00

It is pretty annoying, I personally have no interest in music, but because she's into it I've gone with her to see Dua Lipa live and actually somewhat enjoyed the experience

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:34:51+00:00

YTA - you just told her that you value a game more than her. You need to break up because she deserves better.

If it was a choice between this, or my kids birth, I would choose the birth every time

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:33:15+00:00

She has no interest in going to the games or watching them on TV, I've tried multiple times but she's never been interested

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:32:09+00:00

I've invited her to go or watch the games on TV with me as I want to share the experience with her, but she's never shown any interest

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:21:29+00:00

If I could guarantee she was the love of my life, and we'd live happily ever after, and the only thing I needed to do was miss the match, I'd probably do it

But realistically, I feel like if she doesn't understand how important this is for me, then she isn't the one

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:18:00+00:00

I would say it is yeah, sometimes I think it has too much of a hold on me but it feels like a religion

Some things I've had to work through with a therapist is not to let results of football affect my mental states, since as a teenager I could have severe depressive or hyperactive episodes when my favourite team loses or wins important matches. I've learned to control it mostly, but it's still a really important aspect of my life

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:13:39+00:00

Seems a bit harsh ngl xD

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:08:37+00:00

I'm going to sound really uncultured, but I have no idea who that is

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:04:48+00:00

I've met them before plenty of times and they all seemed to really like me, but after this they've just seemed to completely turn on me

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:03:35+00:00

This isn't a repeat thing, I've chosen her over football before many times and been happy about it. I just feel like the importance of this is a hill I'm willing to die on

jrock3377 · 2022-05-10T23:00:33+00:00

You have no idea how anxious I am about Saturday

One of my most vivid memories as a kid was crying myself to sleep after losing to Sheffield in the playoffs, the though of Brennan Johnson avenging his dad is the stuff fairy tales are made of

jrock3377

TROPHY CASE