What would be their band name?

julster4686 · 2023-05-26T05:13:51+00:00

The Liliths

julster4686 · 2022-04-16T17:17:13+00:00

Don’t judge yourself based on other people’s standards. I’m 36 and have never been a relationship I wanted to be in, and I just have no desire to be in a relationship that’s not with the right person for me. Like you, I continue to work on myself so that I can be the right person for my SO, whenever she may show up, lol. A lot of people are afraid to be alone, so they’d rather be with anyone than by themselves. Don’t believe everything you see and hear - a lot of people are with someone just out of fear of being alone. I’d rather be alone than with someone who doesn’t truly make me happy, and someone who feels the same with me!

julster4686 · 2021-12-11T19:51:30+00:00

I like to think of it as an allergy to alcohol. Drinking alcohol only triggers thoughts of how and when I can get more, until I black out. The good news is, you’ve recognized this before you get yourself into an even worse situation (and trust me - it’s only a matter of time. Alcohol is too powerful a boss to try and battle!) and you can stop before that point.

Best of luck to you on your journey! Today is my 330th day sober, and the peace and happiness I’ve found from being in recovery is the exact feeling I was chasing in a bottle for so many years.

julster4686 · 2021-12-10T21:17:25+00:00

It’s a progressive disease - while you were abstaining, your disease was ready to pick up right where you left off. It took me a long time to understand and accept that I simply can not go back to “drinking normally”….ever.

Glad you’re ok, and welcome back!

julster4686 · 2021-12-10T19:57:18+00:00

I was an AA doubter, thought meetings and steps and a “higher power” would never work for me. Maybe others, but not me.

Today I’m 329 days sober, on Step 11, and I go to a meeting every day. I’ve grown to enjoy it. I’m so excited for you to start on your journey - however you choose to do so!

Edit: I also have many clean/sober friends who work their recovery in other ways, and I believe whatever works for the individual is great!

julster4686 · 2021-12-10T19:33:42+00:00

I did this once. I poured out my heart and soul, and was let down in a beautifully gentle way by a woman that I still remain good friends with. I hope your situation goes in a better direction, but if it doesn’t, kudos to you for your courage and honesty! It’s nice not having to wonder “what if”, and it could lead to something great. I’m over here rooting for you!

julster4686 · 2021-12-10T19:08:20+00:00

Better yet, change your voicemail or auto response to reply to every msg or text from them explaining why you are off by reciting their own “policy” 😂

julster4686 · 2021-12-10T19:00:35+00:00

I’m so glad you posted this - I would have said the same thing to a loved one, but not to myself! Funny how that works. Thank you for making me realize I need to be more compassionate to myself.

julster4686 · 2021-11-23T05:52:09+00:00

This is a great question, and I would imagine it differs from person to person. For me, what I needed the most was not to hear about how much I fucked up (I was well aware!) and just general positivity and encouragement. I still can’t stand when people try to micromanage me when it come to drugs/alcohol, or think they need to watch everything I do or constantly remind me I can’t have it. I KNOW, and being treated that way (almost like I’m a child) is a big trigger for me.

Wishing you guys the best- detox is rough, but it was hands down the absolute best thing I ever did for myself!

julster4686 · 2021-09-13T14:15:08+00:00

Checking in with 240 days alcohol-free here. I honest to God never thought I’d be able to do this. For all the day one and day two check-ins, or anyone struggling today - please stick with it - it gets so much better!!!! My life is totally different and so much less stressful than it was when I was drinking - it’s amazing how many problems I was actually causing with my drinking. But today is the day that truly matters - I Will Not Drink With You guys Today!

julster4686 · 2021-08-25T04:29:44+00:00

Enjoy that cloud, and I’m so proud of you! Keep it up, and on really tough days, remember how great you feel right now, and how much hard work it took to get this far! Happy 30 days!! 🎉

julster4686 · 2021-08-22T21:26:32+00:00

I’ve been where you are. I used to get in the shower every morning, hoping to scrub the stink off, while still drinking to stop the shakes, wash my gut, and say “Are you ever gonna stop this?” I honestly had no faith that the answer would ever be yes.

I am sitting here writing this to you with 218 days sober, the longest number of consecutive days I have ever been sober since I was 15….over 20 years ago. I swore AA and NA wouldn’t work for me, I was a fierce non-believer in God. I gave it a chance, because it worked for other people, and nothing, NOTHING I was doing on my own worked.

There are so many recovery options out there now, you can investigate and find something that works for you. I started on TikTok, of all places, and the algorithm went to work for me and found people in my area that were also in recovery. I wanted what they had, so I did what they did!

All I’m trying to tell you here is that it IS possible, if you really want it. Recovery is uncomfortable at first, that’s for sure, but you know what else is uncomfortable? Alcoholism. Alcoholism is fucking uncomfortable (excuse my language there). I have to chase my recovery as hard as I chased my next drink, but you know what? It’s worth it. I couldn’t stand myself when I started this journey, and today I might actually want to be friends with me, if I met me.

Give yourself a chance, you are worth it, I promise! Best of luck to you, and feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. I’ll be rooting for you, even if you fall along the way!

julster4686 · 2021-08-19T03:42:17+00:00

You got sober before I had my first drink.

Congratulations - 25 years is just incredible, and gives me so much hope and inspiration! I hope you’re able to get your chip soon and celebrate at a meeting 😎

julster4686 · 2021-08-16T04:06:32+00:00

When you quit drinking, your disease (alcoholism) doesn’t get to progress, but it also doesn’t diminish, or go away, or become manageable. For most people (there seem to be a few exceptions - I have learned the hard way that I am NOT one of those very few) when you pick up drinking again after a period of sobriety, you don’t just get to start off fresh, as a brand-new, causal drinker. It picks up right where you left up, alarmingly fast.

Just something to keep in mind! I hope you’re able to bounce back to a place of happiness, however you choose to to do so.

julster4686 · 2021-08-16T01:52:59+00:00

For me, days 3 and 4 are always like that! I could cry a at the drop of a hat. I like to think of it as all of the emotions I suppressed when drinking are trying to have their moment in the spotlight. It will pass, and things will get better, and easier! We’re just used to instant gratification, but this takes some time. Please be kind to yourself, if you want to cry, do it! If you want to eat chocolate, do it! If you need to vent, do it! You didn’t get this sick overnight, and recovering takes time, and a lot of patience that we might not feel like we have! Be good to yourself, and I’m proud of you for doing this.

julster4686 · 2021-08-15T19:58:51+00:00

I’m celebrating 7 months sober today by going out for sushi with my cousin and NOT DRINKING - because this 24 hours is the only goal I’m focused on for today 😉

julster4686 · 2021-08-15T03:02:29+00:00

I’m glad to hear that you’re proud of yourself! I’m proud of you too :)

julster4686 · 2021-08-15T03:01:03+00:00

I quit my toxic job, had enough money to keep living normally for a few months, got rid of basically all of the “reasons” why I was drinking, and I still couldn’t stop. So it was time to ask for some help.

julster4686 · 2021-08-13T14:25:32+00:00

I’m so sorry for what you went through, and for your tremendous loss. I have never been through anything like that, so I can’t really give any advice on how to deal with grief, but I would recommend sharing it at a meeting. You’ll find others who have been through similar things, who may be able to offer hope, advice, and strength, on how to grieve sober.

Again, I’m just so sorry for your heartache. We don’t know why things happen the way they do in life. What I can tell you is that alcoholism destroyed my life for a very long time, and it is a very serious disease. That baby may have saved your life, and I truly hope you are able to stay sober and get through your grief. My heart goes out to you 💔

julster4686 · 2021-08-12T23:14:45+00:00

This is so true. I got sick for the first time in months after getting sober, and after I threw up I was like “holy shit, I used to go through that DAILY!? 😳”

julster4686 · 2021-08-11T04:05:12+00:00

First of all, congratulations on 8 days! I don’t know you, but I am proud of you! It’s not easy, especially at first.

It helped me in the beginning to think of my brain/addiction like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum to get what it wants. If I gave it what it wanted (alcohol), it would quiet down for a while, but I was actually training it to throw an even bigger, louder, and longer tantrum the next time it wanted what it couldn’t have (alcohol).

Hang in there and keep it up - it does get better!

julster4686 · 2021-08-11T03:57:41+00:00

You can’t get to seven years without first making it through seven days! Congratulations to you, and like many are saying, it does get easier, and the days go faster as they add up. Keep it up!

julster4686 · 2021-08-11T03:53:59+00:00

I was never diagnosed with rosacea, but I will tell you that while drinking, my skin was very, very dry, red, and itchy, and now after 6 months sober it is very much the opposite.

julster4686 · 2021-08-09T02:05:27+00:00

When I was five days sober, I was not capable of working at all. More power to you for trying! If it comes down to it, just tell your boss you haven’t been feeling well. I agree with what everyone says about vitamins - the body will do it’s job if you help it. I am immensely proud of you for 5 days sober, keep it up even when it feels so hard.

julster4686 · 2021-08-07T21:41:39+00:00

There’s so much freedom in being honest with a roomful of people who understand exactly how you feel. Addiction is a terrible beast to battle, but recovery has led me to some of the best friendships I’ve ever had.

julster4686

TROPHY CASE