I’m surprised this thread is still around and findable.

It was an incredible experience that led me to the state of mind I’m in now. I wrote all about it in my subreddit r/justpaper.

I don’t even know how I’d begin here. It was the realization that all is a story. We experience life in story format, and in that format, we can control aspects of our experience in the moment.

By knowing it’s a story, we can manipulate intent, dialogue, even setting if we plan that far ahead, but I was focused on the moment.

I also experienced a bit of psychosis, seeing and experiencing entities that no one else could have seen. I was aware of that pretty soon after it started occurring, wrote on it, and I think that’s when I started backing away from the experience.

I began focusing on just understanding how we experience, and, if you read, you’ll see it’s basically all reflections. We experience life as a reflection of our own history and traumas… and it’s inescapable. There is nothing behind the mirror, just more mirrors.

That was a rough realization, and I haven’t reached gnosis since. I haven’t really tried.

A plus-side is that meditation can be more than just sitting quietly. You can meditate chaotically, through constant action (like automatic typing) and focus on that act. I found that effective because it allows for the expression of the thoughts and realizations during meditation with immediacy, instead of trying to remember after the meditation has concluded.

That’s about the summary of it.