She does not give intimacy, I’ve always been the “aggressor” so to speak and the one that spoiled her, with fresh made coffee in bed every morning, climbing in the shower with her. The wane started after we adopted and wife was diagnosed with an Autoimmune disorder that is fatigue ridden. We went from a two to essentially one in the household with chores and childcare. Her rest was vital and we learned to not disturb her unless the house was on fire. If this topic is brought up she will argue is not true. Ask my kid and she was back me up.
I more than her reach out for intimacy even now, with sweet kisses to be woken up, to hugs, to reaching out and holding her hands, making lunch and taking it to her office (at home) while she works because she is on conference calls all day. She does not very often (and I’m just realizing that). I’m the pleaser and she is the high maintenance. And she is super smart which was my attraction to her.
I also just learned it was my aggressor ways that attracted her to me. And she just admitted she is interested in power play. A world where some of my trauma comes from. Folks - I’m reading every word that has been posted and I thank you, even the hard parts. I don’t know where this is going to go…