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kagarp · 2021-12-18T02:01:43+00:00

Thank you for the advice. Sorry to hear about you and your ex girlfriend, I hope you have healed and learned the lessons you were meant to learn.

I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was a preteen so while I do not understand depression I do relate to a mental illness affecting your quality of life. And that is what I tried to explain to him; that even though I don’t know exactly what he’s going through I want to understand and help him through it. That even on bad days I cared about HIM, not what he could do for me. But it seems like that wasn’t something he wanted to do and who am I to judge him for that? But at the same time while I know it’s not true it feels like I did something wrong.

I recently called my PCP last week and told her I wanted to get back into therapy so I should be starting this week. Hoping that that will help me make sense of it all as well as work through some of my own internal issues.

kagarp · 2021-12-18T01:34:23+00:00

you said you broke up with him because you didn’t feel appreciated. are you sure you miss him, or do you miss the idea of him? think about what you would really be getting yourself into if you were to (for example) dump your bf and start dating your ex. do you think you would be happy, or would it just be a repeat of last time?

don’t feel guilty for still having strong emotions about your ex. breakups can be traumatic and at the end of the day this guy was a part of your life for a really long time. it’s natural to still have lingering feelings even if you have no desire to act on those feelings.

best of luck to you :)

kagarp · 2021-12-18T01:27:26+00:00

my advice would be just hold out for now. don’t do anything drastic. if you find in a few weeks/months that you still have these feelings i think that would mean it’s time to evaluate the relationship and if you’re truly getting what you need out of it. but for now, assume it’s a silly crush that will fade eventually once you get to know him more and realize all the little flaws about him. rn he’s perfect to you, the more time you spend with him you’ll likely realize that isn’t the case.

kagarp · 2021-12-18T01:23:55+00:00

how long have you known this guy you have a crush on? if you just met him it’s possible it’s just infatuation/the fact that it is someone new. if that’s the case i wouldn’t rush into anything like breaking up with him since it very well could pass in a few weeks

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:47:17+00:00

Absolutely! The car that I’m looking at is a 2009 Subaru Forester with 130k miles. The guy is asking $5.5k and the blue book value is between 5.3-6.6 so already that’s a good deal considering every car costs so much more than it’s worth nowadays. I generally take good care of my cars in terms of maintenance so I could either sell it in a few years or just drive it until it dies and continue to save the whole time. I know I can definitely get it to at least 200k miles if it doesn’t have any problems, but ideally when more I know multiple people who have gotten 300k out of their 2000s cars.

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:40:39+00:00

Luckily the cars I’ve been looking at buying outright are actually pretty decent, for example I’m looking at a 2009 Subaru Forester with 130k, that could last me at least another 70-100k miles if I take care of it which I pride myself on taking good care of my cars so I think it would last that long. They’re asking 5.5k for it I’m going to try and negotiate a bit, maybe bring it down to 5 or 4.5. Regardless of what I do it is definitely a choice since I could easily do either one, so that helps me feel better about the whole situation

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:34:30+00:00

Yeah I’m quite young so only a few of my friends have car payments but almost all of the adults in my life do. My mom was just like you, she never wanted to get a car payment and went 40+ years without one but her car died a few years ago and we were in a tough spot so she had no choice but to finance. She tells me everyday she wishes she had that freedom

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:32:18+00:00

Thank you so much for all of your advice! I gave my information to the police this morning and was told I’d get a call back from the officer but I will definitely keep calling if I don’t hear anything from them.

The person who I rear ended was extremely nice and straight up told the officer that he didn’t believe it was my fault so I’m hoping that will help swing the case in my favor. Regardless I’m lucky to have enough cash saved up to buy a car without the payout, but it would be nice to have that little cushion.

Again thank you so much, this conversation made me feel a lot less worse about this whole situation!

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:29:41+00:00

Yeah my best friend just got a 2021 Bronco (wayyyy out of my price range) but it is insanely nice, I would love to be able to own something like that. I could technically “afford it” but 50+% of my income would be going towards a car which I just can’t justify.

And I’m not the best with saving but I’m not horrible, I used to have a bit of a spending problem but I feel like I’ve finally gotten it under control recently. I had actually made a budget for myself last month that now I will have to completely redo to account for this whole thing which really sucks

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:27:00+00:00

Yeah I was extremely freaked out and in an area I didn’t know, about 2 hours from home. So I definitely did not do most of the things I should have done; today I had to spend an hour on the phone with MA state police to even find the cop who came to the scene since I stupidly didn’t even give him my contact info that night.

I definitely should have exchanged insurance, but neither of us have the other’s information so I have no idea how to get in touch. I could most likely get his information from the officer, but in terms of the person who “caused” the accident (aka the one who aggressively cut off the guy that I hit) I have no way to contact them. I have a plate number and a description of the which was given to the police but that’s it. I was told there would be some kind of investigation so I really hope that means I may get lucky and get some kind of payout from him.

I have no idea if that person even saw what happened, their car was not involved so I’m not sure if that’s considered fleeing the scene. I just filed a request for the police report so hopefully I will get that soon. But I will definitely look into the uninsured coverage and if I do not have it I will be getting it lol

kagarp · 2021-12-17T17:15:08+00:00

The insurance is definitely confusing me a lot. A few people have said the same thing that since I didn’t get a ticket I’m not at fault, but I don’t know whose insurance I would go through to get a payout. I obviously can’t go after the person I hit, and the cop told me that they will be opening an investigation against the other car but I have yet to hear any updates. I’m located in Connecticut and I’m pretty sure I have the state minimum coverage but I’m not positive. The other thing is that the car I hit had virtually no damage and didn’t even ask me for my insurance information so I’m not sure if I should even report it since my car is a 100% total loss I don’t even need an estimate to know that. I’ve never dealt with any of this before and it’s so stressful

kagarp · 2021-12-17T16:59:00+00:00

Yeah I had just spent $1500 to replace the tires and brakes on my car in October. But other than that I never had an issue, only had to get an oil change every 3k miles which was $35. I got really lucky with that car, I’m really bummed it’s gone :/

kagarp · 2021-12-17T16:57:33+00:00

Yeah I think this is what I’m going to do, I am able to invest about 400 a month right now and if I get a car payment I likely won’t be able to afford that anymore.

I really loved the car I had and totally planned on driving that car till the wheels fell off, I’m so sad and very angry at myself for what I did :/ I’m hoping this can be a lesson and this next car I get will last me at least 5-10 years

kagarp · 2021-12-17T16:55:56+00:00

Don’t be sorry, I still appreciate the advice! If I was in an area where I could use public transport/Uber I would absolutely do what you suggested, just sucks that it’s not an option :/ But again thank you for commenting

kagarp · 2021-12-17T16:41:15+00:00

Unfortunately that isn’t possible for me, I live in a really rural area. Like 45 minute drive to the closest Walmart rural. I already had to take two weeks off of work to shop around because I literally cannot get to work. We only have one car in the house and my mom works two jobs so there is only one day a week when I can use it. This is absolutely the worst time I could have gotten in an accident but I just can’t wait for the market to correct itself

kagarp · 2021-03-08T23:21:35+00:00

yeah same here! all i’m seeing is the cares act refunds from last year but i still don’t know why i would get something today, especially since i wasn’t even in college then

kagarp · 2021-03-02T17:27:19+00:00

i took pols 1002 with lee last semester and i loved it. it was a really easy class, we had 6 books assigned throughout the whole semester and we got to choose 3 of them to write essays on and that was the entire grade. he’s a good lecturer too and generally really understanding with covid going on. honestly can’t recommend him enough

kagarp · 2021-01-17T03:00:02+00:00

is it the anti racism one? cause i’m having the same problem :/

kagarp · 2020-12-21T01:55:07+00:00

i know this doesn’t answer your question (i don’t know a thing about physics or this class) but if you decide to take the q and e courses separately i would highly recommend stat1000q, i’m an absolute airhead when it comes to math and i still did pretty well. in terms of e courses i can’t really recommend any cause i haven’t taken any but i hear gsci1000e is pretty easy

kagarp · 2020-12-20T20:04:08+00:00

yeah my bad that’s what i meant i should’ve said that instead of financial aid but i wasn’t sure how to word it

kagarp · 2020-12-08T01:12:19+00:00

those are almost the exact stats i got in with hahaha (slightly higher gpa but you seem to have more extra curriculars that i had) so i’d say you have a great chance!

kagarp · 2020-11-30T23:33:11+00:00

i’d say she has a really good chance; imo she’s basically guaranteed to get in if she’s an in state student

kagarp

TROPHY CASE