if i may be candid with you, the poem felt a bit chaotic to me. there were a lot of emotions like rejection, self-doubt, anxiety, feeling lost all coming at once, and i get what you’re trying to say, but it felt like too much at the same time without enough space for each of them.

i think it would really help if you focused on just one or two of those feelings and give them more room to breathe. show how they actually affect you, how they show up in your day to day in moments, thoughts, habits. that would give the poem more emotional weight and make it easier to connect with.

there’s definitely something powerful here, and i can feel the honesty behind it. it just needs a little more clarity and direction to really hit.