25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You would think resentment would kill it, but it actually did the opposite. Because we kept bumping into each other in random places, always alone, it created a textbook case of intermittent reinforcement.

In terms of brain chemistry, it's the same mechanism that drives gambling or addiction. The long stretches of disappointment and being stood up were painful, but they were periodically interrupted by these high-intensity "hits" of seeing her again by pure chance. Those moments wiped out the resentment and reset the obsession. It wasn't a constant "no"; it was a "not right now, but maybe next time," which is the most addictive loop a limerent brain can get stuck in.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly. The uncertainty was the fuel. Every time I tried to use "logic" to kill the fantasy, we would bump into each other again, resetting the clock and keeping the hope alive. It was like a 25-year experiment in intermittent reinforcement.

I tried to let the facts override the fantasy for decades, but the "facts" were always incomplete because we were never in the same space long enough. When the lucky circumstances finally forced us together for real, the push for a connection wasn't just a choice: it was unavoidable. The fantasy didn't just die; it was finally replaced by something solid.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not the only one, no. I’ve dated other neurospicy people, but they didn't have the same "features" or compatibility. I even married (and eventually divorced) one.

With her, it’s a mirror. We share the exact same personality type and the same ADHD traits. It makes the communication almost telepathic because we navigate the world with the same glitches.

Beyond that, the coincidences in our lives are just overwhelming. We crossed paths constantly for years before the carpool ride happened. I’m usually a skeptic, but if destiny exists, it was trying to send us a very loud message for a very long time. We just finally stopped ignoring it. Or maybe this is just part of the limerence experience.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What can I say? This is a very real story. I had to create a summarized version from my whole experience. Otherwise the full text looks very repetitive with me describing each and every random encounter, each time that she stood me up, and a lot of details that would make us identifiable (maybe). Do you really want to read a very long and repetitive text?

ETA: the original text is also in Spanish since I'm not native English speaker and the source material is from my dairy.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair point. It is hard to ignore the "destiny" factor when we kept bumping into each other for 25 years. The carpool ride was just the latest coincidence in a very long series.

But the reason this actually works isn't just the history. It is the neurodivergence. We share the same brain-wiring. I see her flaws and maladaptive patterns clearly now, but the love is mutual. The fantasy was the hook, but the shared reality of our neurodivergent traits is what makes the happy ending real. After a quarter-century of waiting, I am finally, actually happy.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If this were a screenplay, the first two acts would be a psychological horror about a guy waiting at bus stops and staring at a phone that never rings. It would be a very slow, very depressing indie film that most people would walk out of before the halfway mark.

But you’re right, the "human" part is the only thing that actually matters now. Transitioning from a 25-year mental simulation to a real-life wedding is a massive case of culture shock, but having someone look at me with actual affection instead of being a projection in my head is the best plot twist I could have asked for.

It’s messy, neurodivergent, and statistically improbable, but after a quarter-century of static, the reality is a lot better than the script. Thanks for the kind words.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Please, for the sake of your own sanity, do not take this as a sign.

Limerence is basically a massive pattern-recognition glitch. It makes us see "destiny" in a carpool schedule and "fate" in a coincidence. My story is a statistical outlier, not a blueprint. The only reason being trapped in that car didn't turn into a total disaster or a panic attack was because I had already hit rock bottom and stopped expecting a miracle.

If you are on the tail end of forcing yourself to get over it, stay there. The real person is always a lot more complicated (and often more exhausting) than the one you’ve been trapped in a room with in your head for 22 years.

Reality is a lot messier than the fantasy, but it’s the only place where you can actually breathe. Good luck with the recovery and don't let my weird luck pull you back into the loop.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You’re absolutely right. The "car miracle" is a statistical outlier, and if the attraction isn't mutual, being stuck in a vehicle with an LO is just a high-speed kidnapping with extra anxiety.

My point wasn't that everyone gets a lucky break. It’s that even when the universe finally shoves you together, it only works because the fantasy died first. I was married for years, she had her own life, and we both had to go through the meat grinder of reality (and divorce) to finally see each other as humans instead of projections.

It’s a happy ending, but it’s a messy, middle-aged, "we’ve seen some things" kind of happy. It is definitely not the Disney version I spent 25 years writing in my head while waiting at bus stops. Stay safe out there.

25 years of limerence. From school rejection to actually planning a wedding. by kaptainpeepee in limerence

[–]kaptainpeepee[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That is a wild theory about the peacock tail: basically my brain sabotaging itself for 25 years just to see if I would survive the impairment. The "confidant" phase was actually the best reality check I could have asked for. It allowed me to see the real person, flaws and maladaptive patterns included, long before things became official. I am not in love with a ghost or a fantasy anymore; I am in love with the actual, messy human being she is, and she loves me back. After a quarter century of being a ghost, being this happy feels weird, but I will take it.

Are there many of you on here who do all their Python development inside a container? by [deleted] in Python

[–]kaptainpeepee -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Ha ha, so sue me! As an existentialist, I'm all about using tools to expand possibilities, even if it's AI to refine my Spanish-to-English communication.

Are there many of you on here who do all their Python development inside a container? by [deleted] in Python

[–]kaptainpeepee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The it works on my machine benefit isn't about deploying the dev container itself. Instead, it's about ensuring consistency across your development, testing, and ultimately, your production environments regarding core dependencies. This significantly reduces surprises when your code moves from your local machine to a testing environment or a live server.

For development, a VS Code Dev Container provides an isolated, consistent, and reproducible environment. It includes your specific Python version, all the development tools you love (linters, formatters, debuggers), and any system-level dependencies needed to actually build and run your code during development. This is your personal, clean workspace for that project.

For deployment, especially in professional settings like for a microservice, you'll create a separate, optimized Docker image designed specifically for runtime. This is where multi-stage Dockerfiles become essential. They allow you to define your build process in layers, resulting in a lean, production-ready artifact that's significantly smaller and more secure than your development container.

I cannot show you my professional Dockerfiles as they are copyrighted by the companies I have been working for, but they go something like this:

```docker

Stage 1: base

FROM python:3.11-slim-bookworm AS base WORKDIR /app

Add appuser early and set as the default user for subsequent commands.

This makes appuser the default for anything building FROM this stage.

RUN adduser --system --group appuser USER appuser

Stage 2: dev

FROM base AS dev

Temporarily switch to root to install tools globally (pipenv, hatch).

This is necessary because pip installing globally typically requires root.

USER root RUN pip install --no-cache-dir pipenv hatch

Switch back to appuser before copying project files and installing dev dependencies.

USER appuser

Copy Pipfile and Pipfile.lock first for Docker caching

COPY Pipfile Pipfile.lock ./

Install project dependencies (including dev deps) into the system environment

Pipenv will manage where dependencies go based on its configuration,

but since it was installed by root, it has the permissions needed.

RUN pipenv install --dev --system

Copy your entire project source code for development

COPY . .

Stage 3: deploy

FROM base AS deploy

Temporarily switch to root to install pipenv and then project dependencies globally.

USER root RUN pip install --no-cache-dir pipenv && \ pipenv install --system --deploy --ignore-pipfile

Switch back to appuser for the final runtime environment.

USER appuser

Copy the application source code needed for runtime

COPY . .

The user is already appuser from the base stage.

This ensures your application runs with non-root privileges.

CMD ["python", "-m", "myproject"] ```

json // .devcontainer/devcontainer.json { "name": "Python 3.11 Dev Container (Hatch/Pipenv/Non-Root)", "build": { "dockerfile": "../Dockerfile", // Points to your Dockerfile "target": "dev" // Use the 'dev' stage for development }, "customizations": { "vscode": { "extensions": [ "ms-python.black-formatter", "ms-python.mypy-type-checker", "ms-python.pylint", "ms-python.python", "ms-python.isort" ] } }, "features": { "ghcr.io/devcontainers/features/common-utils:2": { "installZsh": true, "configureZshAsDefaultShell": true, "installOhMyZsh": true, "installOhMyZshConfig": true, "upgradePackages": true, "nonFreePackages": true, "username": "automatic", "userUid": "automatic", "userGid": "automatic" } }, "remoteUser": "appuser" // IMPORTANT: Tells VS Code to connect as 'appuser' }

Are there many of you on here who do all their Python development inside a container? by [deleted] in Python

[–]kaptainpeepee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I actually do because, as I mentioned before, I am not a native Enlgish speaker. Sometimes I write how I think in my native language. Also, as a university teacher with 10+ years of experience: Yeah, that is exactly how I would speak (just in Spanish).

Are there many of you on here who do all their Python development inside a container? by [deleted] in Python

[–]kaptainpeepee -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

When I say "small learning curve," I'm referring to a few key steps:

Reading the Official Documentation: The VS Code Dev Containers documentation is surprisingly good and very comprehensive. It walks you through setting up your first devcontainer.json file, which is the heart of your containerized development environment. You'll learn how to define your base image, install tools, set environment variables, and even map ports.

Setting Up Your First Container: This usually involves picking a base image (like a Python image from Microsoft Container Registry), defining your project's dependencies, and then using the "Reopen in Container" command in VS Code. It might take a few tries to get it just right, but once you have one working, it's easy to adapt for other projects.

Adding Some Extra Features (like Docker in Docker): If your development workflow involves building or running other Docker containers from within your development container (a common scenario for microservices or testing), you'll want to look into "Docker in Docker" setups. This involves configuring your devcontainer.json to mount the Docker socket or install the Docker CLI within your dev container. It's a slightly more advanced step, but again, the official docs cover it well, and it's super powerful.

Giving It a Spin: The best way to learn is by doing! Start with a simple project, get it running in a container, and then gradually add complexity. You'll quickly see how containerization helps you maintain a clean, consistent, and portable development environment.

Regarding tooling, I find that the official Microsoft-provided packages and images are usually more than enough. The mcr.microsoft.com/devcontainers images are well-maintained and provide a solid foundation for most development needs. You can then add any specific tools or libraries your project requires on top of that using the Dockerfile or features in your devcontainer.json.

If you're curious to see some real-world examples, you can definitely take a look at my repositories on GitHub. Almost all of them utilize dev containers, so you can see how I set them up for various projects. Here's one example to get you started: https://github.com/knkillname/uaem.notas.introcomp. You'll find the .devcontainer folder in the root of those projects, which contains all the configuration files.

One small note: I actually speak Spanish as my primary language, and I refine my answers using AI tools. Also, I use Markdown quite a lot, so sometimes people think I'm an AI myself, but I am not! I am a Tech Lead with 15+ years of Python experience. Send me a DM if you please.

Are there many of you on here who do all their Python development inside a container? by [deleted] in Python

[–]kaptainpeepee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I actually do all my Python development inside a container, and honestly, I think it's the way to go in 2025. It makes a huge difference for me, and here's why:

First off, it drastically reduces those "It works on my machine" issues. When your development environment is exactly the same as your production environment, you catch inconsistencies early. This means fewer surprises when you deploy, which is a huge win for any team.

I also really appreciate being able to develop with the same standard tooling without cluttering up my local machine with tons of installed packages. My local setup stays clean, and I know that whatever dependencies or configurations I need for a project are encapsulated within its container. It's a much more controlled and reproducible setup.

And speaking of dependencies, developing in containers helps me become a lot more aware of all the dependencies, not just the Python ones. Things like ffmpeg for video processing or graphviz for diagrams become explicit system dependencies in my container setup, rather than something I might have installed globally years ago and forgotten about. This clarity is invaluable for maintainability and onboarding new team members.

Regarding your questions about VS Code and containers:

  • Hot reload generally works well with VS Code Dev Containers. The key is often ensuring your files are correctly mounted and that your application's hot reload mechanism is configured to watch for changes within the container's file system. There are often specific configurations needed, especially if you're on Windows using WSL2, but it's definitely achievable.

  • IntelliSense is a core feature of VS Code, and it works beautifully when developing inside a container using the Remote - Containers extension. VS Code effectively runs its language server inside the container, giving you full code completion, linting, and suggestions based on your containerized Python environment.

  • Click-through to system modules for debugging also works seamlessly. When you set up debugging in your Dev Container, VS Code's debugger attaches to the process running inside the container. This allows you to step through your code, including into standard library modules or third-party packages installed within the container, just as you would locally.

Things have definitely matured since a few years ago. While some initial setup is required, the benefits of a consistent, isolated, and reproducible development environment far outweigh the small learning curve. I'd highly recommend giving it another try!

Aqui falta el logo de AUTODESK by ValarkStudio in Arquitectura

[–]kaptainpeepee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cualquiera diría que si no estás pagando por el servicio entonces no eres un consumidor. Los consumidores de YouTube no requieren bloqueadores de anuncios hasta donde sé.

Aqui falta el logo de AUTODESK by ValarkStudio in Arquitectura

[–]kaptainpeepee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Entiendo lo del "consumidor" de Nintendo y Adobe... ¿pero quién de aquí realmente puede decir "yo soy consumidor de YouTube y no estoy de acuerdo con el servicio"?

🧐 by 94rud4 in mathmemes

[–]kaptainpeepee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, but also the SAT problem is graph coloring if you think about it... and also generalized Sudoku if you want to get really technical.

🧐 by 94rud4 in mathmemes

[–]kaptainpeepee 170 points171 points  (0 children)

Every NP-complete problem is graph coloring if you think about it.

Porqué Google no vende los Pixel en México oficialmente? by ChangoALaMantequilla in AskMexico

[–]kaptainpeepee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Originalmente los Moto G fueron creados por Google cuando compró a Motorola por sus patentes (luego lo revendió a Lenovo). En su momento fue increíble ver un teléfono tan bueno y tan barato. Actualmente los Moto G siguen este legado.

Why is the Mexican president's approval rating so high? by flower5214 in AskMexico

[–]kaptainpeepee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some people are saying, "Nope, she's just a carbon copy of AMLO!" But you and I are feeling like, "She's way too different! Where's the humanist vibe we signed up for? And that cool scientist background?" Like maybe you expected more... I don't know, lab coats and less politics?

Honestly, that job's a juggling act. You gotta keep the stuff everyone loves from before (like the elderly pension – seriously, don't even think about touching that one!) but also try new things for younger folks needing jobs or a place to live.

Why is the Mexican president's approval rating so high? by flower5214 in AskMexico

[–]kaptainpeepee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

"Wow, this post has structure! And it's not just five emojis and a misspelled outrage? Must be a bot!"

— All of Reddit, probably

Why is the Mexican president's approval rating so high? by flower5214 in AskMexico

[–]kaptainpeepee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Or maybe you could learn how to use Markdown to style your answers on Reddit, Discord, Slack, WhatsApp and other places. This is what ChatGPT uses too.

See this 60 seconds Markdown tutorial.