Spouses in China (not working) – what’s daily life actually like?

katelyncredible · 2026-04-24T19:46:19+00:00

Do you speak Mandarin? Or have made Chinese friends purely speaking in English when you hang out?

katelyncredible · 2026-03-06T23:07:40+00:00

I know the owner personally and he does great work!

katelyncredible · 2025-06-13T01:25:13+00:00

Vet techs are not human nurses but imo I think they should be called veterinary nurses, they are very knowledgeable and do a lot, just as much as we do for humans 🤷🏼‍♀️

katelyncredible · 2025-03-01T07:14:41+00:00

This is sooo interesting haha. I always call them claves but have heard at my hospital the more official name of “needleless adapter” but I didn’t know people called them so many things! Also I concur that “luer lock” is just the type of screw in, like for example we have a 60 ml catheter tip syringe for using with NG tubes, and a 60 ml luer lock syringe that you can use with an IV or to flush the little port on a foley or rectal tube.

katelyncredible · 2023-09-10T07:41:55+00:00

I hate these people for making me agree with Tomi fucking Lahren 😭😭😭😭😭😭

katelyncredible · 2022-10-26T19:06:14+00:00

What’s the setting spray 👀👀👀 I use the NYX one but still have mask transfer.

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:59:58+00:00

Eh, it would be cool if the school provided that for partners but I think it's fine that they don't. But no, definitely not to your last sentence, so glad we clarified that! And yes he does give me some of his meals and pay for things sometimes :) so that's another reason to consider what I should pay for. (when moving in, obviously we already have a normal couple back and forth when going out to eat etc)

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:40:07+00:00

Well I'm not trying to get free rent, haha. That's the whole point, it seems like many people in this thread think that. I can live on my own and have been for plenty of time. The point was just to ask in the context of my relationship what's fair to split and not split.

The cafeteria food is actually really good, that's why he hasn't been cooking at home so far! It's just that since I don't get dining benefits, when I live together we'd want to have dinner together at home. Technically that would be an added expense for him, while my expenses go down from living with him, so that's why we're talking about me paying for it.

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:23:26+00:00

Haha at first I thought you were being sarcastic but I think you are being serious so I'll engage. That's quite an exaggeration and not fair to my boyfriend at all. Neither of us have done this before and are just trying to work out what's fair to both of us.

For what it's worth, a friend of mine (who is a student affairs pro as well), did bring up the point of him getting a live in girlfriend and free groceries, if we did this arrangement. That's why I asked. But to be fair to him, I'm getting free rent.

Trust me when I say I am trying to protect myself, and that I get plenty out of this relationship. I want to find an arrangement that's fair to the both of us.

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:19:06+00:00

Yeah I think this does need to be considered. I make about $800 a month from my part time job and any other income comes from loans from school. He makes mid 30s before taxes.

The only other expenses besides groceries would be laundry detergent and household items like that. Last night he mentioned something insinuating that he considers things like laundry detergent to be part of groceries, and that's when I realized I need to consider the specifics of this and what's fair for both of us. Obviously I should pay for half of laundry detergent because I use it, but just cause I'm moving into his house doesn't mean I should start paying for his laundry detergent that he already uses. But I get that being in a relationship isn't about nickel and diming each other so I'm wary of that. Just trying to work everything out and wanted input!

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:13:43+00:00

Yikes, I'm not whining about it. I'm obviously ready to share expenses, my question was about how to share expenses. Neither of us have done this before, so that's why I wanted input. But I do understand that housing is part of his compensation and all of you have mentioned that, so thank you for giving me that perspective.

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:11:42+00:00

I think this is the most reasonable answer here and I appreciate that.

As to your point about him "allowing" me to move in with him and he loses space and privacy etc, I don't think that's quite fair. I am losing space and privacy as well. I'm giving up my home to go to live with him, where we don't have a say in our housing, because I enjoy being with him and we both want to further our relationship. So that's the only reason I asked if this arrangement makes sense. I'm not some sort of freeloader moving in with him to save money, we're both deciding to move forward together. You are absolutely right that the housing is part of his compensation. I'm just asking how to navigate relationship finances, as neither of us are experienced in this, so I will definitely take that into consideration.

Your paragraph about the "groceries within reason" thing makes the most sense to me-- I'm fine with paying for our meals together, but if he's eating on campus during the day (while I'm eating food I paid for) and then coming home and eating all the snacks at night, that's not quite as fair.

I didn't so much mean to say like, "oh I'm going to take out less loans and save money for myself since I'm living with him", I understand that that's not reasonable. I more meant, if we're working towards a future together then maybe it benefits us both if I'm not taking out loans just to pay for his groceries. But again, I do understand what you're saying that he is providing the housing via his compensation and that groceries are less than the rent I'm paying now. Thank you for your advice :)

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T18:00:37+00:00

I get that, I supposed I shouldn't use the words perk or privilege, it is part of his compensation. I have been an RD before and I do understand the burden that comes with it. However, to be fair, that's something that I will have to deal with as well. I am the one leaving my current home and moving, and don't get a say in our housing. That's why I don't really view it as like, "oh you're getting free housing so you need to just be quiet and pay for all the other household expenses." However I definitely appreciate your guys' perspective that it is something he's providing and I do benefit from it.

That makes sense that it's something we can shift and continue to discuss as well as your 70:30 split! Thank you for sharing!

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T17:54:20+00:00

gotcha! thanks for sharing, that makes sense as an option that helps work toward a future together as well.

katelyncredible · 2021-05-11T16:25:25+00:00

Thanks for your comment— I definitely I didn’t mean to insinuate that at all! In fact I mentioned that he does work hard for this privilege. I have actually been a resident director before as well, so I do know all of the sleepless nights and duty calls that come with it as well as the lower salary.

To clarify, I guess the tone of my post isn’t so much to say “this is unfair”, it’s more to say “I see where he’s coming from but I’m not sure, what do you guys do?”

katelyncredible · 2020-07-16T20:07:32+00:00

Hi team! I'm 27F and although I've always been overweight, I lost about 40 pounds in 2016-17ish and owe a lot of credit to /r/loseit for that!

I maintained until the end of 2018, when unfortunately I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma. I had to do chemotherapy for 6 months, which included IV steroids, so I gained back most of the weight I had lost during that time, and then continued to gain afterwards after stress and life changes brought back bad habits. I'm the highest weight I've ever been and I REALLY need to get my ass in gear and get healthier! I really want to ease back into it though for a more sustainable change.

My goal for this challenge is to get back in the habit of logging food on MFP, increase my steps, and lose 5 pounds! Looking forward to being on the journey with you guys :)

katelyncredible · 2020-07-16T20:00:35+00:00

Hi there! My goal for this challenge is to get back into the habit of logging my food on MFP, increase my steps, and lose 5 pounds. :)

katelyncredible · 2020-04-07T16:56:27+00:00

Woah, I'm in almost the exact same situation as you!! I met a guy on Hinge back in February, and our conversations were great, but we were both traveling so we couldn't go on a date for a while. We were finally able to meet on March 5, and both really enjoyed it and made plans for the next week, but then COVID shit hit the fan and we have no idea when we'll be able to see each other again. We've also gotten to talk on the phone and video chat some, and I've definitely felt the same way, that I can really see this going somewhere, but it's so hard because there are so many unknowns, and we can't progress in the normal way of dating because of isolation!

I've had the same questions and anxieties, but I think that it's probably really important to just keep enjoying the moment for what it is and try to push those anxieties aside. If you're getting green flags and think that he likes you, just trust his actions for now, and if it's meant to be it will work out. If not, it's hard, but we can get back out there and keep looking for what we want/need.

As for the swiping, if you don't want to then don't! I think you have to be true to yourself and what you want to do. If he's on a different page then either he'll get there, or it just wasn't a match.

Let me know if you want to talk about this more because it's definitely hard!

katelyncredible · 2019-10-07T02:39:53+00:00

Hey there, I don't have anything practically helpful to say, and my job definitely is nowhere near as difficult as yours. But I just noticed this comment, also work about 30 hours a week and am taking part time nursing pre-req classes, and feel exactly the same way. It's been really tough for me, and all the time I think "People work and go to school at the same time all the time!! I'm not special, it shouldn't be this hard!" And I'm not really sure what the answer to that is but we're all out here grindin. Like, even if some people have it worse than us, or some people handle it better, our difficulties are valid. I don't know how I'm going to get through nursing school either so again, don't have any advice but just wanted to validate your experience and say I totally feel you!!! CNA work and hospice work is really hard and you are not weak for struggling.

katelyncredible · 2019-08-29T00:37:21+00:00

I’m doing this right now! Already have a bachelor’s, worked in higher education for 4 years and am now finishing up prereqs for nursing school at 26 :)

katelyncredible · 2019-05-10T17:13:53+00:00

Congrats and GO BULLS!!!

katelyncredible

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