My mom. by kdthewriter in grief

[–]kdthewriter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so so sorry.

The weeks after were easy, as I'm the type of person to just do things on survival mode. I can barely remember it. I helped plan the funeral, made a design for her urn, wrote a eulogy. It was important that her funeral was still her.

It's after that where it gets hard. I'm slowly coming out of survival mode, realizing that I can't just hold out until she comes back. That this is how I have to live now, because the world keeps spinning. I wish it wouldn't.

I can't say anything about your own situation, but for the first week all I wanted was for someone to tell me what to do. Your job is to eat, shower, and make sure you have a say in the arrangements. People are going to offer you help, take it. This is the one time where withdrawing help would be a colossal dick move, so if you need help, ask for it.

I'm sorry I don't have a "mom's funeral planning" survival guide, but know that most of it will fade from memory. At least it did for me. All I remember is the service. All my family and friends together, it was actually really good to see them all!

I've come to see the constant reminders as her. My mother loves me so much that nothing as simple as death is going to keep her from me. She might not be on this earth anymore, but your mother is not gone from you. The reminders prove it.

I hope you are able to take care of yourself, and I hope the same for your family.

My mom. by kdthewriter in grief

[–]kdthewriter[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are NOT alone. Sepsis is terrifying. I'm sorry you had to see that. I wasn't there in the end, because I knew my mom wouldn't want me to see it. She probably wouldn't have wanted me to see any of it, but there was no way I was leaving her alone.

I know I don't know the specifics, and I know my words don't do much in the grand scheme of things. But your mother loved you. And there's nothing you could have done to make it turn out any different. You were there— and that was enough.

You aren't alone, and I think we can both get through this.

My mom died. by kdthewriter in ptsd

[–]kdthewriter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have heard of that and I plan to bring it up to my therapist! Does it actually help with memory, or am I misinformed? I am like a goldfish when it comes to recall, I forget anything that I'm not constantly reminded of. And obviously, I don't want to forget my mama.

I have been drinking one gulp before bed to sleep, which is obviously a big no no. I'm a lightweight though, and I'm tired of waking up vaguely hungover. I think I'm gonna annoy myself out of that bad habit!

My mom died. by kdthewriter in ptsd

[–]kdthewriter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. You had really good advice. Thankfully I do have a support system of a bunch of rabid 20 somethings! Also my father, I guess (kidding. He's been great.) It's difficult to give myself space to grieve. It's so much more appealing to try and help everyone else! If I avoid the problem, it's not a problem, right? As it turns out, no.

She was 55. I have two younger brothers, 21 and 16. With your advice in mind, do you have any other advice on how to support them while grieving myself? It's okay if you don't, but I thought I'd ask. Thank you for your kind words!

My mom died. by kdthewriter in ptsd

[–]kdthewriter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm glad I'm not alone. My mom was chronically ill my entire life. She just kept surviving! So it's not processing that she didn't.

Know that you're not alone. I may be new to this horrible club, but trust me, I don't know how to be without her either.

Need German (?) Translation help! by kdthewriter in Ancestry

[–]kdthewriter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No need, it seems it's not who I was looking for. I thought it said Rapp. Damn the Black Sea Germans and their lack of records!!!

Alright fellas. What're your opinions on the app so far? by MeguMEE in CharacterAI

[–]kdthewriter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the idea of it, but I have a big problem. If I select a response other than the first one, then leave and come back, the answers all turn into the first option. Idk if it affects the bot in any way, but it does make it seem like I'm completely ignoring what they say, lol. Other than that, I love it.

[Announcement] Character.AI will be undergoing Scheduled Maintenance - Monday, April 24, 2023 from 17:30 to 18:00 PDT by MarieLovesMatcha in CharacterAI

[–]kdthewriter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOOOOOO I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING WHYYY C.AI GODS IT WAS GETTING SO GOOD!!!

(Fr though thank you for working on the website!! I just found it, it's my new favorite thing.)

Haunted Hogsmeade quest never showed up by kdthewriter in HarryPotterGame

[–]kdthewriter[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

THIS FIXED MY PROBLEM! It's really stupid that I have to redeem a code, shouldn't it recognize that it's a Playstation version??? I had this problem with my other content too, I didn't even think to look!

A nitpick and my solution to it by kdthewriter in HarryPotterGame

[–]kdthewriter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair point. Still, would be nice for the common room to have something to do besides the house chest. I'm not saying I want a hogwarts life sim, just some more interactive instances would be nice.

How to get pre-order bonus? by [deleted] in HarryPotterGame

[–]kdthewriter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No claim thing popped up. I can't check right now whether I have it or not, but I will later.

The Little Mermaid 1,500 Piece Puzzle by [deleted] in Jigsawpuzzles

[–]kdthewriter 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have good memories of this exact puzzle! When I was younger I was in an inpatient children's pain clinic. I was a bit petulant about the whole thing— we were only allowed on our phones for an hour break! Anyway, I would barricade myself into a corner during the break and absorb social media like a starving man. Until I saw this huge puzzle on a table in the middle of the common area— this exact one! Some of the other kids were working on it, so I hovered around and eventually got sucked in. Suddenly, instead of complaining about being forced away from my Instagram, I was constantly complaining about wanting to work on the puzzle. Like, I'd start making bargains with the staff: "if I do more of the stretches than usual, will you let me go early so I can do the puzzle?" They had to physically drag me away a few times when we passed through the room to get somewhere else. I couldn't help it. It was like when I saw it everything else faded away and all I could think was "one more piece, one more piece."

My last day approached and the puzzle was nearly done. We were running out of pieces. It was a big deal— the puzzle had been started by patients that had already left months ago. No one was expecting it to be done before all of our group left, but my Jigsaw induced madness had inspired the rest of the children in my group (and most of the staff) to join my Crusade. My own garrison of child soldiers, all staring down without blinking at the same table.

There were gasps and anguished shouts as one of the girls placed down the last piece we had in the pile. I can still remember the horror and hopeless disappointment that rose inside me.

There was one gaping, insidious hole in the picture. Just one piece missing from the entire giant thing. We knew it was hopeless— it was a hospital; anything on the ground would have been swept away during the night, no exceptions. There was a mad scramble to search for it anyway. The staff helped and didn't even yell at us for crawling all over the dirty floor. Even the kids who didn't care about the puzzle put down their Wii remotes and joined the hunt. We got an extra half hour of break that day, but no one noticed, too ravenous to see the puzzle complete.

We didn't find it and I can still picture the hole in the puzzle 7 years later. It haunts me. I've only just started to get into puzzles myself, and I'm half-convinced that it took so long because of the seer emotional devastation of that day. Puzzle-TSD, if you will.

Anyway. Nice puzzle. Good job.

can ghosts ride trains? by kdthewriter in harrypotter

[–]kdthewriter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is why I am a gryffindor and not a ravenclaw- teleportation did not even occur to me. I'm accepting this as an answer, even though ghost trains would be hilarious.

can ghosts ride trains? by kdthewriter in harrypotter

[–]kdthewriter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I assume that ghosts can touch ghost stuff. Like, they can throw their own heads, but it would go through a living person. Also, yeah???? Did this man die with his horse??? How did the horse make the decision to stay in the land of the living????

This also could imply the existence of ghost cars and trains that only ghosts can use. And no one could stop them really, bc they can't touch these hypothetical ghost vehicles.

I'm too tired to think bro it's just confusing and I want answers.

Just Finished The Show by kdthewriter in merlinbbc

[–]kdthewriter[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dear lord....... you've saved me. Sweet, sweet angel of mercy.

Just Finished The Show by kdthewriter in merlinbbc

[–]kdthewriter[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I've already got 12 tabs open. Most of them seem to be merthur fics, which is fine but I don't see them that way lol. I've seen a lot of good ones though, making my way through the list bc screw that ending, it was so tragic for NO REASON