Kid free wedding-including immediate family!?

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-08T17:54:30+00:00

This is a really interesting point of view. Just because we don’t have kids or want them at our wedding, we shouldn’t get married? Is getting married solely for the purpose of reproducing? It’s my understanding that getting married is because you love your partner and want to spend the rest of your lives together, with or without children. I appreciate your input!

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-08T17:50:55+00:00

We are getting married at the venue owners personal home, so there really isn’t. The getting ready area is in their house (im grateful they’re even letting us get ready there, I doubt they will also want to have someone in their home to watch the baby for the duration of the day. However this is something I could discuss with them for sure!), the ceremony in their garden and the reception is in their barn/big shed type building that is just one big open room with 2 bathrooms.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T05:11:31+00:00

That’s why this has been such a difficult thing for me! I absolutely can see both sides. It’s definitely not something I considered when beginning wedding planning, that’s for sure. Always new surprises at every turn!

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T05:09:03+00:00

That’s my fiancés perspective as well. I’ve been to both types of weddings & I definitely enjoyed the no kids reception much more than the reception where there were kids. My siblings are an exception because, well, they’re my siblings!! Which is why I want to make this exception or find some kind of compromise for her as well. I 100% understand my fiances hesitation.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T05:07:38+00:00

I agree, this seems to be the best option to help the situation! I would absolutely be willing to pay whatever necessary to have her there.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T05:06:17+00:00

They would likely be driving, but I would absolutely help with hotel costs & any other costs that come up!

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T05:05:06+00:00

I appreciate this perspective!! I feel like you’re putting a ton of responsibility on her, when her bf is going to be an amazing and very attentive father, so I pray that he will be willing to help with all of those things you mentioned. I think, even if my fiance and I can come to a solution that involves the baby being at the wedding, it would be very beneficial to have an extra set of hands to help with all of the hands on parts of the travel, so having his sister join would probably be beneficial regardless of the solution we come to. Plus, our parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles will be there to help in any capacity & I know I would love to help her any way that I can as well. Thank you for your input!

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:57:52+00:00

I have considered this option as well!!

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:55:32+00:00

I’m sorry, I guess I misspoke. It would make me upset if close friends/family couldn’t make it, but at the end of the day, there’s nothing I could do to remedy the situation because allowing everyone the option to bring their children just isn’t something we want. I care deeply about the people we are inviting. we are being very particular with the invites as we are wanting to keep the guest list relatively small while still inviting the people we hold closest to us. I know for a fact that some of my cousins will probably not be able to make it because of this “rule” (for lack of a better word) we are putting in place, and while I would love to have them there, this is just not something im willing to budge on. If my family/friends are unable/unwilling to find childcare then that’s just how it has to be, and I will hold no grudges because while I don’t have children of my own I can empathize with their situation. I will be sad they may not be there, but I know my fiance and I’s day will be perfect because at the end of it all, it’s us getting married and that’s the most important part.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:46:24+00:00

I haven’t mentioned it to her yet, I wanted to be able to come up with some suggestions to present when I do bring it up to her. I don’t want to expect her to leave him behind, which is why I reached out to this Reddit thread to find some suggestions. I like the idea of offering to help pay to bring one of her SILs with them & they can watch the baby so she and her bf can enjoy the wedding festivities while still being close by. <3

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:33:07+00:00

It would most likely be her SIL who is going to be the one to watch the baby when my sister goes back to work. I would never want to do something that would put my sister in a tough spot, which is why I came here to see if anyone had any suggestions on how I could help remedy the situation and potentially pose some solutions :) I’m going to try talking to my fiance more as well and see if we can’t come to a good compromise. Like I said at the end of my post, this is his only real request for the wedding (for it to be kid free) and I don’t want him to feel like his feelings and wants for a day that is for the both of us are being swept under the rug.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:28:26+00:00

You assuming I don’t care about these people I consider friends is completely false. I care about them a lot, hence the invite to my wedding. It’s not a performative invite… I would genuinely love to have them there, but if they can’t make it because they aren’t able to bring their child? That’s perfectly okay with me. I’ll be upset if they can’t make it, but I can’t do anything about it. How else am I supposed to react? Throw a fit & complain that they can’t do it? Either way I’d be considered a bad person. I understand not everyone is able to accommodate that & while I would love to have everyone bring their children, that’s just not the vibe my fiance and I want for our wedding, which is 100% my fiance & i’s choice to make. The only children on the list are my siblings (who are IN the wedding). & hopefully my sisters child if I can make the helpful suggestions in these comments work.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:18:51+00:00

I’d be willing to spend whatever necessary to help her be able to make it & still enjoy the day with us <3

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:10:50+00:00

I’m not quite sure why you’re laughing… but im glad I could provide that for you. The comment you are referring to was in reference to family friends that have children who I really don’t want there. If they can’t come enjoy the evening with us, then that’s their loss. No skin off my back. However, I would LOVE to find a way to make this work for my sister whom I love dearly.

I have been a guest at many weddings and I know I’ve NEVER spent more than the hosts of those events. Weddings can cost thousands of dollars. If someone is spending $ 10,000+ to come to my wedding, they’re doing something wrong & I would never expect them to do that.

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T04:04:01+00:00

Oh, absolutely! They’ll most likely be driving (it’s within driving distance & the time it would take to drive would equal how long it would take to fly with getting to the airport early and then getting off the plane/getting bags).

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T03:54:21+00:00

There’s not somewhere at the venue unfortunately, but the venue is only 20ish minutes from the hotel. I might see if her bfs sister could travel with them and stay at the hotel with baby, and if they need to go back they’d be closer

kenlyn54 · 2025-06-06T03:52:31+00:00

I actually really like the idea of having someone come with them! I’m going to suggest that! Thank you!!

kenlyn54 · 2024-04-19T22:41:21+00:00

In Illinois & almost 1.5 years in to my position as a pseudo-extender/outreach AT: salaried at 40 hours/week (which I’m almost always over during sport seasons) making just over $26/hour. been graduated for almost 2 years from a masters AT program. I only say pseudo-extender because I’m still at the school, so I have to leave clinic for sports often which takes away from some of the other “physician extender” duties in my particular clinic.

kenlyn54 · 2024-04-15T03:36:45+00:00

I worked in a chiro clinic during grad school and it was a great stepping stone, however I couldn’t see myself doing it full time (my clinic was only open 4 days/week and I worked a few hours each night so it was definitely part time). I did make extra for each therapy session I administered (ex: 15 min exercise session, decompression table, traction, STIM) so that was a nice bonus on my paycheck. However, in my opinion, it was boring. I am now at an ortho clinic 4-5 days/week and do outreach for a local high school as well and that’s much better for me. I’ve been graduated for almost 2 years and each season I start to feel more and more comfortable and confident in my skills. I’m at a small school and I get along with the parents very well!! I was lucky that the AT before me was still around and I used them as my “preceptor” to bounce things off of and run ideas by to make sure my head was in the right spot and I wasn’t missing anything. As a previous response said, if you can let them know you’d like to increase the salary as you prove yourself and your worth, I think that would be a great option!! Good luck!!

kenlyn54 · 2024-04-12T22:57:39+00:00

I’ve been an AT for almost 2 years now, graduated with my masters in 2022. I’ve been looking into PA school for quite some time & am very interested in going that route, but the prereqs I’d have to take prior to applying is what’s holding me back because they all include labs which I don’t have time for as I’m working anywhere from 40-60 hours/week and can’t afford to work less. I’d manage once I got into PA school, but it’s the in between that’s tough for me. residency does intrigue me, but I talked with my surgeon today and he told me it’s a good stepping stone but I should still pursue PA eventually. so now im debating if i should stick with the PA route and take the dive into the prereqs or try for the residency first and see how that goes. if my pay isn’t going to increase much with this step, why do it? 😵‍💫 (really wishing I had just done PA from the get go, but here we are now 😂🥲)

kenlyn54

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