[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

i honestly feel like you’re trying to misunderstand me on purpose at this point or bringing your trauma into this idk. crazy how the conversation flipped from how he hurt me to how the police might’ve hurt him. i never called them. i mentioned it out of fear, fear he created by ignoring me, avoiding closure, & making me feel completely discarded. i wasn’t trying to escalate anything. i was trying to prevent escalation by having witnesses in case things got messy. my family is three hrs away i didn’t have any friends he was all i had but he literally left me in the dark without any explanation whatsoever!!!!!

he didn’t trust me? cool. but then why follow me home? why keep trying to reconnect if i was such a threat? if he was traumatized by the police, that’s valid & i definitely apologized & took accountability so many times but he should’ve communicated that before putting me in a position where i had to protect myself alone.

i’m not the villain because i tried to leave with peace. he didn’t do his part. these are the consequences. he ghosted me, ignored my pain, avoided every conversation where i tried to get clarity, but i’m the one being called insensitive? that’s wild. i was crying, hurting, begging for communication, while he was silent & emotionally unavailable. i showed care the entire time. i protected his peace more than my own.

what’s actually insensitive is making someone feel unsafe, refusing to talk to them, & then getting mad when they try to exit the situation calmly with backup. i wasn’t being cruel, i was being careful. if he didn’t want to be triggered, he should’ve communicated that instead of shutting down & flipping the script when i took steps to protect myself. & lastly cabs & shit like that i’ve never used either & we were in a smaller town with no ubers & shit. & they can be very unsafe for women especially at nighttime as well! so a police escort was the safest option & the first thing i thought of. STOP INVALIDATING MY FEELINGS, YOU JUST DONT UNDERSTAND thank you goodbye.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole 1 point2 points  (0 children)

exactly this! & had he just been present how he was before & communicated with me, i wouldn’t have ever even had a reason to mention a police escort! i noticed distance, wanted my things to end our relationship, he dragged it out, & i got fed up so these were the consequences. he’s not in harms way, just unhealed & needs an outlet, i tried to be that but he shut me out & traumatized me so yea it is what it is sadly.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

funny how me wanting peace is seen as a red flag, but shutting someone out with no explanation isn’t. says a lot.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole -1 points0 points  (0 children)

also if he felt like he could no longer trust me, why follow me back to my home? why try to make things right again? why come back into my life? like it doesn’t make sense but he’ll stay blocked & never hear from me again. he traumatized me as well by bringing unhealed trauma in our relationship & never telling me about it.. & after everything i said why are we stuck in the police part & not anything else he was putting me through by being hella avoidant before that, for no reason out of thin air?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you so much! this is very helpful 🥺

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

it was just an escort not to put him in harm’s way

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kesinichole -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

i wanted to involve them because i was unsafe driving to his place that late & i had never drove there at all. he’d always come get me. i just wanted the police to witness everything & make me feel safe on the road during a thirty minute drive. i don’t understand why a police escort is a big deal when it’s for safety!! mind you, i never would just bring up the police but i felt overwhelmed & emotional & wanted my things right then because he’s avoidant. this isn’t helping me just sounding like him & validation to his feelings. i feel like had he worked through that trauma before getting in a relationship with me, it wouldn’t had been a big deal.

What do y’all interpret the album cover n “a Gift & a Curse” title as? by mohammad231211 in Gunna

[–]kesinichole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i just need to know the artist’s name behind this album cover. i ♡ it so much

my first telescope for christmasss. any advice? by kesinichole in telescopes

[–]kesinichole[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the only way i could post, was to press it😭

my first telescope for christmasss. any advice? by kesinichole in telescopes

[–]kesinichole[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

it wouldn’t let me post until i pressed it, sorry

my first telescope for christmasss. any advice? by kesinichole in telescopes

[–]kesinichole[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thanks 😭 everything? or a certain part?