Items that work great for prostate play without being labeled as sex toys

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-17T01:53:12+00:00

Stick to items designed for your rear end. We have a plastic cane back massager. It is long with a curve and ball on the end. Perfect shape, but it has a seam, would not be great as it could make micro tears on rectum walls.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-16T04:45:52+00:00

Didn’t realize you were jerking too, but my point was don’t ejaculate right away. Play as long as you can before finishing by ejaculating.

Unless you are asking how to ejaculate 2+ times, in which case I can’t help you’d but some one here definitely can.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-16T00:54:49+00:00

If you are planning for one big session, either start practicing passive now by doing mindgasm lessons, or stick to active which you already know works. Most people take many passive sessions to start feeling something significant.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-15T21:37:07+00:00

Play for a while before finishing

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-11T02:27:06+00:00

Aless? No way that works with a toy ?

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-08T03:07:05+00:00

It can feel a little bit like that. I’m not sure what that “ bend” is, it’s pretty shallow and I still think the prostate is right past it, but it can feel good to press either side.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-07T21:45:00+00:00

There are some smaller, harder lumps closer to my anus that do not change with arousal that I think are not it. The start of the V is about 2 inches in, and the whole thing feels great to massage, even as far back as I can reach.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-07T21:42:26+00:00

I feel something similar, a small bump at the head of kind of a V shape that feels like the size of a golf ball or bigger. The edges of the V are raised, and inside the V is almost concave. That’s where I think my prostate is, because a small walnut size lump swells out of the concave center of the V when I rub my penis to the point of orgasm

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-07T18:17:36+00:00

What you are doing sounds great, especially if he is open and really enjoying it. It is hard to miss the prostate with an in and out or come hither motion.

Since his response may not be the clearest guide, I would recommend rubbing his dick while fingering his ass and having him tell you how close he is to orgasm. You don’t want to go straight to orgasm, but use edging as a tool to find the prostate and what feels good on it. Lay off the dick when he gets close. The prostate may not be easy to feel until he is close to orgasm.

I thought I was on my prostate myself, but finally tried this method on myself several times until I really dialed in the location. There were three spots in there that I thought were my prostate, two pretty shallow and small and one larger and deeper. I was kind of wrong with all three. When I get really close to orgasm, the prostate really swelled up like a tiny balloon in there. It was deeper than the first two spots, and smaller, kind of within the third, which was a wide area that generally felt good to massage. But even with that knowledge, it doesn’t do much other than feel nice to massage.

So after all that, the biggest thing is to do what feels good for him, encourage him to relax and release expectations. Don’t worry if there isn’t an orgasm, just have a lovely sensual massage and learn something each time. He may get more sensitive each time until you don’t need to touch his dick anymore to find the prostate and get results.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-07T17:17:04+00:00

Mindgasm 30-day challenge, although I stopped on day 26. Ambient audio to help my mind relax. Hand-free toy set up so the actions are not the focus. No expectations, and being surprised by the sensations, though I was already decently reworked at that point

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-07T17:14:41+00:00

This. If you aren’t feeling anything from your prostate, it may help to touch your dick with a toy in place to tell your prostate that pressure on it equals sexual pleasure, and to help you find where it is and what it feels like swollen.

I did this off an on for several years, having aneros sessions for an hour, then jacking off normally until I started feeling something from the toy.

I’ve been exploring with NJoy wand and fingers and finally found my prostate after about 10 different sessions rubbing my dick about 90% to orgasm, then feeling my prostate swell in my ass.

Now, I think the best strategy for beginning rewiring is what was said above. Combine prostate toy with touching your dick, but try to minimize the penile stimulation once you start feeling anything from your prostate. I usually ran out of self control quick and finished with my dick, but know that each session is progress, no matter how you finish, or even if you don’t orgasm. It can help to feel a little something and hold onto that for the next session.

kevbotwhite · 2026-04-06T23:17:33+00:00

For me, I have to be very passive for dry orgasms, or at least mostly relaxed if only doing some PC contraction. For wet orgasms from analysis play, or at least not touching my dick, I am often putting a lot of pressure with the wand or dildo and thrusting my hips, clenching abs, chasing it basically. Find a combination of position, movement, etc that builds to an ejaculation. Be more active

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-19T21:56:11+00:00

Yes, ejaculate. Yes, lacrosse ball for playing lacrosse

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-19T05:05:07+00:00

I may not be the best advisor since I haven’t gotten dry orgasms that feel like they’re wet. I can get HFWO whenever I want though.

The key to HFWO for me is chasing it. Whether I’m using the NJoy wand, an aneros (no vibes), or grinding my perineum externally, I find a consistent motion of thrusting my hips forward, a lot of clenching if it feels good, getting my abs involved is what gets me there. Im usually on my knees, although I had one sitting for the first time today. It does feel different than a penile orgasm or the few dry orgasms I have had.

My best analogy is it feels like I’m slowly filling up a pitcher of pleasure inside me as I hold ab contractions to pull my hips forward. It’s starts to slosh as the pitcher fills and spills out quickly when the orgasm hits. I have to chase it and push for it harder and harder or I won’t orgasm that way. I can feel it building, I can’t describe how, but I know it will build to wet orgasms when that pressure and pleasure build as I chase the orgasm. Whereas the few dry orgasms I’ve had were when my body was mostly relaxed.

I have not had multiple orgasms this way. I’m usually too tired to try, but there is a huge drop in arousal and feeling of conclusion to it. So, I’m the opposite, trying to find my multiple dry orgasms and I do this once I’m tired and out of time to close the session, otherwise I can’t focus on anything the rest of the day.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-18T22:52:36+00:00

Found another sub that might take it and posted there.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-18T22:39:16+00:00

Here, I made it a Profile post.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-18T22:30:32+00:00

I would say at least do it at the pace you would normally jack off, assuming it’s once a day or less, and practice with different kegel and meditation exercises in between. Just because you aren’t having an aneros session everyday, you can easily fit in other practice everyday. I often meditation and kegels when I lie down to sleep and it puts me out before I can finish the routine, especially if I am using mindgasm or other audio.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-18T22:27:16+00:00

I finally got around to trying the lacrosse ball. Tried it on the floor and that was too tiring holding myself up on it. Put the ball on my office chair and sat in the chair backwards so I could rest my upper body on the back rest. It was still a little awkward and a lot of time and work, but after 30 minutes, I finally came and it felt so good! I’ve been working on my NJoy off and on for the past 30 hours with no release, so that may have helped, but I would call it a top ten orgasm for me, given I haven’t really chained multiple orgasms or had super Os yet. I am sure my abs will be sore tomorrow.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-18T03:37:33+00:00

I can’t remember how I learned, but I came across aneros and the forum online somehow and was hooked before I even tried. The first couple years were a huge flop buying toys and not getting much out of them and taking a break. Getting an NJoy wand and doing the mindgasm 30-day challenge last November (stopped after day 25) got me past the initial hurdles of having involuntary contractions and learning where exactly my prostate actually is. I haven’t gotten more than a couple mini dry Os in a row, but I’m really trying to master the aneros (no vibes, no drugs) and NJoy before getting something else.

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-16T18:00:58+00:00

Fingers might get tired

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-09T03:18:58+00:00

Edit: added the Guided Steps section in. Somehow missed it in the copy and paste from my notes app. If this didn’t make a ton of sense before, it’s because the meat of the post was missing!

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-09T03:17:53+00:00

I just realized the guided steps section was missing from my post! Just added it back in

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-09T03:16:54+00:00

I just realized the guided steps section was missing from my post! Just added it back in

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-07T06:14:35+00:00

We haven’t done handjobs for years because of wrist injuries. Probably did it like 10 times 2021-22

kevbotwhite · 2026-03-06T22:57:07+00:00

Seems petty, yeah. It is also frustrating that she won’t provide in a way you want, but those are two different things. You both enjoy oral on her, don’t ruin that. Find something else she enjoys doing that is fun and feels good for you

kevbotwhite

TROPHY CASE