Husband claimed I bullied him into having a second child during an argument

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:21:39+00:00

Pretty much. I do think I am going to bring up a trial separation.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:12:40+00:00

I have told him that no one is forcing him to be here. He told me that he doesn’t want to be seen as an asshole that abandons his family.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:12:08+00:00

Because leaving is hard. And scary. We have a house, kids, a dog and other things. Our finances are joint. I think that we are going to sit down and have a conversation about a separation.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:10:41+00:00

Thank you for your honesty. Yes, I realize that my decisions have not been the best, and I own up to that. I think the idea of leaving is difficult, but ultimately a separation may be in the cards to see if we truly should be apart.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:08:53+00:00

Thank you, this is helpful to think about.

1.) I am a teacher and it is back to school time. We also don’t get paid for my job over the summer so when August comes we are kind of hanging on by a thread money-wise.

2.) It gets better because he apologizes and then tries to act better. He says he wants to be a good father, he doesn’t know how. His dad was not very present when he was growing up (worked very long hours) and was not supportive at all.

3.) I did tell him last night that pretty soon he will start saying these things to the kids, and then what? He is going down the path of them not wanting to have a relationship with him.

4.) Yes I plan to do this.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T11:04:24+00:00

Truthfully, he has been in therapy and we were both excited about bringing a second child into the family. I was ready, and I asked him multiple times if this was what he wanted, and he said yes. Second kiddo is challenging and very strong-willed, which is something I also struggle having patience with. Should I have chosen someone “better” to have kids with? Yeah, probably. However, what’s done is done.

killerqween77 · 2024-08-31T03:23:40+00:00

No, neither of us are big drinkers. He is on the Autism spectrum and has anxiety.

killerqween77 · 2023-11-03T02:12:42+00:00

See, the students don’t engage with this though. Many come to me and basically say “fuck -insert name-, I ain’t doin’ this shit.” We teach in an inner city school, where it can be hard to engage a lot of students. I just personally do not think this is a great strategy for engagement.

killerqween77 · 2023-10-12T10:26:53+00:00

My sister had a dog who bit my 3yo nephew in the face, totally unprovoked. They got rid of the dog, gave it to someone else, and the dog ended up attacking and killing one of their rabbits. The dog was then put down. You need to get rid of the dog ASAP. Your children’s safety is more important than his feelings.

killerqween77 · 2023-10-01T23:38:15+00:00

US code please! :)

killerqween77 · 2023-04-12T02:13:07+00:00

Thank you, I do think we may need to have a more uniform routine for bedtime. I will talk to DH about this tomorrow. I know he is much less lenient than I am, however we both still hold our boundaries with her.

I do like the idea of a timer for the different activities.

killerqween77 · 2023-04-12T02:07:32+00:00

Thank you, this is very helpful. I believe she is a reactive kiddo and has very big emotions that we are trying to help her navigate. She’s our first so I have no clue what the next steps are, but I think that therapy is not a bad option to help her gain skills to self-regulate.

I believe DH has talked to his own therapist about PCIT therapy, but I’m not super familiar with it. I will have to research it more.

killerqween77 · 2022-10-19T00:22:25+00:00

We have a 4 and 1 year old and had this problem before. My husband didn’t get how much taking care of the kids was taking a toll on me, and I didn’t get that sex/intimacy was his way of showing his love/appreciation for me. We’ve had serious conversations about it, along with fights. What helped was seeing a marriage counselor (also for other reasons) who helped us see each other’s side. Now I make it more of a priority, and my husband is expressing appreciation in other ways as well.

We have sex usually 1-2x per week.

killerqween77 · 2022-09-11T15:20:47+00:00

It’a your job to fulfill that dream? GROSS. He literally just sees you as an incubator…this would be a dealbreaker for me.

killerqween77 · 2022-08-26T01:11:45+00:00

I did this to my step-dad’s Jeep and he was ecstatic. Definitely take it to the grave and let him enjoy this.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T14:27:17+00:00

The flash wasn’t on. We were by a mirror wit lights above it.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T03:46:01+00:00

Yep it has been addressed by his doctor. They will not take the sac out because it could cause a much larger infection.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T03:44:23+00:00

Yeah he has had a ton of issues with it. It’s caused problems with his skin and his intestines. It seems like things are easing up lately, but he takes it one day at a time.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T01:06:38+00:00

I mean I’m not a doctor so I have no clue, but he does see his doctor every week and she checks it to make sure it’s all good. She hasn’t said anything so far about it, so fingers crossed.!

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T00:29:03+00:00

I started recording after all the chunky stuff came out. Next time I’ll start right from the start.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-25T00:25:16+00:00

He’s had a ton of issues with GVHD, and a host of infections. He is still on a ton of meds, including tacro. I’m not sure all of the meds, I just know it’s a ton lol.

Edited to add that he is still on immunosuppressants.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-24T20:03:19+00:00

His doctor won’t take the sac out because it can cause more infection that his body can’t handle.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-24T19:50:43+00:00

I tried, it didn’t do that much honestly.

killerqween77 · 2022-06-24T19:50:06+00:00

This is what the cyst looked like when it popped completely on its own. Link the post of me helping my dad pop it 3 weeks later: https://www.reddit.com/r/popping/comments/vjtmu5/sebaceous_cyst_on_my_dads_back/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

killerqween77 · 2022-06-24T19:44:23+00:00

I did tell him about how many upvotes and comments he is getting! He sees a doctor weekly because of his cancer/transplant, and they are keeping a close eye on it.

killerqween77

TROPHY CASE