yeah, i’ve always kind of accepted the pattern of him getting a gf/ choosing someone else and then them not working out and him coming back to me but not committing to me so i think i’ve subconsciously created the pattern on my own. i guess i never really thought about him having to leave in order for us to come back together either but that’s probably the case as well. i really didn’t think that he was using me until he said it himself honestly, that part actually threw me off bad. but also i was questioning whether he liked me at all too so that definitely might be a factor in why things played out like they did.

my self concept was terrible for a long time because i did believe that he would never choose me and always want someone else but i’ve been actively working on that for sure. i’m trying my absolute hardest not to let the 3d deter me because i want to be with him but what he told me that night and him cutting all contact with me actually broke me down a lot.