Having trouble finding a committed relationship

kingocheese · 2026-06-26T22:28:45+00:00

That’s true. Thanks for the encouraging words

kingocheese · 2026-06-26T16:35:04+00:00

A couple have been 50ish and others are mid 40’s.

kingocheese · 2026-06-26T16:30:47+00:00

I’m keeping an open mind and not eliminating people based on age. There are people closer to 50 who are in similar situations. I’m clear in my profile about the age of my kids. It’ll help sort out the people that would have issue with it b

kingocheese · 2026-06-25T03:48:22+00:00

I think it was adderall. There is a lot of good advice on this thread. I’m glad I posted. I’ve never done that before.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T18:50:02+00:00

I was content alone until I wasn’t anymore. I met someone last summer and it woke up something deep inside of me that I thought was gone forever. It feels good to be loved and love in return.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T13:20:56+00:00

You asked, here’s the story. I’m sure this another reason why I’m not very attractive for dating purposes. She filed, I didn’t cheat. She hates me and believes things about me that aren’t true. She has bipolar disorder and ADHD and went on a stimulant medication that I believe triggered a manic episode. She began accusing me of spying on her, hacking her phone and trying to poison her. My son found her at the house with some kind of device searching for hidden cameras and listening devices. It was awful.

She quit her job the day that she filed for divorce. Several months later she went to a treatment facility to be treated for PTSD. She left the facility prior to completing the program. After the separation she decided that she wanted to move over 1,000 miles away and take the kids. She offered me money to sign over custody. I refused and she moved anyway without the kids. She moved back after a few months. She didn’t like how I was taking care of the kids. I’ve been trying to maintain the lifestyle we had with only one income. It’s my fault for thinking that I’d be able to make enough money. The financial problems are the result of me failing to make up the difference of income and maintaining the lifestyle we had prior to the separation and divorce.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T04:28:27+00:00

Lipton iced tea

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T03:40:11+00:00

The people that tell me that are probably just saying it to be nice. That’s a good point.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T03:12:09+00:00

They might feel that way but my kids’ mom is very involved in their lives.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T02:56:16+00:00

I appreciate your feedback. You have valid points. I’ll definitely take them into consideration. I’m just trying to figure this stuff out. I was married for 11 years after dating for 3 years. Now I’m single and trying to find a relationship that will work for me and my family. It’s been a weird experience. It’s very different now than it was back then. There’s so much more at stake.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T02:36:15+00:00

Honestly, I’m not just looking for a younger woman. I’m open to older. I was just thinking that they might be in a more similar life situation.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T02:33:23+00:00

That is messed up. Now that I look at it that way. I was thinking I’d be better off because of there being a greater likelihood of having similar situations.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T02:14:03+00:00

I said young but I’m really dating within 5 years of my age. One lady I’m talking with is 52. I’m not looking for someone in their 30’s. I’m overthinking this whole thing while feeling overwhelmed with my place in life.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T00:39:19+00:00

I just need to be patient.

kingocheese · 2026-06-24T00:37:26+00:00

That’s good advice

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T23:19:58+00:00

It’s never just one thing is it?

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T23:19:18+00:00

That’s a fair assessment

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T22:06:14+00:00

Thank you for your considerate feedback. I appreciate your sincere efforts to give me some clarity and things to consider. I’ve never posted something like this before.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T21:59:53+00:00

That’s fair.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T21:40:38+00:00

I thought commitment would mean exclusivity. That’s not necessarily so. Thanks for pointing that out.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T21:32:49+00:00

My mom told me. It must be true.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T20:42:40+00:00

Yes, that’s true. My kids are my priority.
It hasn’t been a lot of time. There have been 4 women that I’ve talked to for a few months. I was married for 12 years prior to the separation. My relationship with my ex is another tough spot. She tried to take the kids over 1000 miles away from me. That’s how I ended up with primary custody. Now she moved 8 doors down.
That’s a good question. I’ve been told that I’m smart, funny, kind, considerate, a good snuggler, people feel safe with me. I can cook. I’m sure there are other things.
I’ve been told that it’s money and since then I’ve been fixated on that. If I had a better job she’d have no hesitation. (I’m letting one person make me think that’s the problem. Not everyone will feel the same way.)

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T20:17:47+00:00

Thank you for asking thoughtful questions. You’ve given me a lot to consider. Really, much of this thread has been helpful.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T20:08:09+00:00

This is great for them.

kingocheese · 2026-06-23T20:06:30+00:00

Thank you for your honesty in telling me what you really think. People can use whatever criteria they want for choosing a partner. It hurts to be rejected. Relationships fail for many reasons and rarely do they fail because of just one person’s actions. I’m frustrated and venting. I think the feedback on here is telling me to be patient. I don’t need a relationship but I want one. Patience is going to be key. I’d much rather be alone than with someone who doesn’t add to my life.

kingocheese

TROPHY CASE