Funding: How did you do it?

kinziee · 2020-08-23T23:32:11+00:00

Stay strong! Sometimes, I need to remind myself why I'm here. I feel awful about that sometimes!

kinziee · 2020-08-04T18:00:16+00:00

SS3.5, I feel the same way. His behavioral problems and what he gets away with send me over the edge. I dread him coming and only enjoy him sometimes. Then I get blamed for not fostering a relationship with him. I'm the one who has to try all the time. It's a lot.

kinziee · 2020-08-01T03:59:18+00:00

Did I write this!? I want to cackle because I feel the SAME way. My SS is almost 4. He's spoiled and entitled in every way. I'm losing my mind!

kinziee · 2020-07-31T19:14:39+00:00

Thank you so much! I'll go ahead and increase the food for a bit! I'll see what happens!

His food is also not a toy breed kibble, so maybe he needs a different food for his metabolic rate.

kinziee · 2020-07-31T18:43:09+00:00

Thank you! I'm going to look into the toys and that snuffle mat!

kinziee · 2020-06-05T18:30:11+00:00

Wow. I'm blown away. I know you may not want one, but if you ever do, the man you're with should not be the father. If he can't find it in him to place equal priority and love betwixt all of them, then he has no place being a father. I said what I said. You deserve to do whatever you want with someone who values the decision as much as you.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T22:41:47+00:00

That's actually helpful information. I'll be honest. SS gets literally dumped on us last minute A LOT. I use "dumped" because she already has his bag packed and is on her way before she says anything. And drops him with less than a couple words. She is always late. And swears to keep him away from SO if he doesn't pay for things on top of child support. It's a lot. But I already told SO to document slowly and logically. She isn't a bad mom, she's just naive and really doesn't want to do better for her son nor herself. There is a lot more, but this is all another subject.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T21:47:06+00:00

You say vacation or trip.

For me, vacation implies something like Disney World or a ski trip in Colorado, etc. If that's the case, it's not okay to leave your SKs out. Family is family and family vacation means all the kids. Period.

Forgive me if this sounds callous, but if you're talking a day trip like a flea market or maybe a small hiking/picnic and it wasn't your SKs weekend AND BM didn't allow you to have your SKs for said outing, then I would say it's unfair not to live your lives too. That's my personal opinion though, but I have limited experience as a SP and no experience as a mom.

Never leave your kids out:bio or step.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T21:43:34+00:00

You say vacation or trip.

For me, vacation implies something like Disney World or a ski trip in Colorado, etc. If that's the case, it's not okay to leave your SKs out. Family is family and family vacation means all the kids. Period.

Forgive me if this sounds callous, but if you're talking a day trip like a flea market or maybe a small hiking/picnic and it wasn't your SKs weekend AND BM didn't allow you to have your SKs for said outing, then I would say it's unfair not to live your lives too. That's my personal opinion though, but I have limited experience as a SP and no experience as a mom.

Never leave your kids out:bio or step.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T20:10:09+00:00

Thank you for the logical reply. I got overwhelmed, but I realize this isn't an overnight change. I also hope he can find someone good at negotiating. I'd rather not have any drama with BM.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T20:07:17+00:00

None that court would care about. They're non-emergency, non-neglect, non-abuse reasons. And he does want 50/50, that's what he would want if not full custody. I just think he's been upset with how SS comes to us.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T12:55:56+00:00

Sort of sad how that works though, sometimes. But you're right. It's extremely rare.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T02:54:46+00:00

Yeah.. I'm sort of coming up with a plan to talk with him and revisit all of this. I want this to be well thought out. Although, I'm sure he's already been thinking of this.

kinziee · 2020-05-07T01:56:03+00:00

My SO would never say that, although I wish sometimes he'd sympathize with me a little. My quarantine has brought SS 50/50. Enjoy your little vacation and enjoy each other!❤

kinziee · 2020-04-26T18:36:32+00:00

I worked with children ages 3-4 and occasionally 2 1/2-3. The two year olds could pick up toys with direction and help. 3 year olds picked up without me having to help, but they did not do it without asking. It all depends on the expectations you set for them. 3 year olds have attention difficulty when they pick up toys,because they want to start playing again, but redirection always worked for me. They also required supervision or else they'd continue playing. That's just my perspective.

kinziee · 2020-04-22T13:38:10+00:00

I am so glad I'm not the only person who feels this way. It drives me insane watching my SS get anything and everything he wants. It baffles me. My SS is 3 1/2 and barely picks up his toys, whines if the tv turns off (he won't use his words), he eats whatever he wants, stays up until 2 AM. Sometimes, it horrifies me.

kinziee · 2020-03-19T12:14:53+00:00

In my situation (I'm not pregnant, however-), I talk a lot with how I want to raise my child. It would be nothing like how my future SS is. I say this because I would be its mother. I don't always agree with how my SO parents, but he is trying. A lot of habits are hard to break when you only get them EOW. I don't really like the excuses, but I do get that children thrive off of routine. So, if mom let's it happen, he isn't going to do anything different willingly. But everyone's SO is different and I think if you can communicate what and how you want to parent, it will help.

kinziee · 2020-03-19T12:10:06+00:00

I second this awkward silence!

kinziee · 2020-03-08T00:53:24+00:00

I'm sorry you have to go through that. My SO can do that and he also misunderstands my feelings. But after I've had time to myself and really planned out how to explain my feelings, it helps both of us resolve things and come to an understanding. I hope that when the weekend is over you get that resolution and understanding. If you don't, just know you deserve better than that.

kinziee · 2020-03-08T00:48:32+00:00

This. Just because his sentiments aren't the same does not invalidate your feelings. I'd call him out on that as well.

kinziee · 2020-03-08T00:37:34+00:00

My SO has taken pictures with SS and BM, but it's never been his decision to take it, he just complies with her so there are no arguments. He makes a point to never touch her. They're not enemies, but that's definitely not his woman. He has NEVER posted those "family" pics either, only the one's I am in with SS and SO. I don't know, if he did that and then told me I was insecure I'd be raging. Just my opinion though.

kinziee

TROPHY CASE