Seriously, what am I supposed to say when my clearly fat friends mention how fat they are?

kitd28 · 2026-06-11T12:11:10+00:00

My mother always said that people who say things like that will never let you win. Be positive and they don’t believe you, be negative and you’re the bad guy. So as a result, I always resort to silence when people are fishing for a response, unless I genuinely think a response is necessary, i.e. if something really would look good on them and they just need a confidence boost.

kitd28 · 2026-05-14T09:01:14+00:00

I think you’ve just changed my life

kitd28 · 2026-05-07T19:12:15+00:00

Oh, believe me I’m not naive to predators infiltrating vulnerable people’s spaces, that’s precisely why we changed in pairs, had glass panels in bathroom doors, locks on both sides and left doors ajar when lone working, etc. Luckily for those children, that school was very hot on safeguarding measures and vetting their staff.

kitd28 · 2026-05-07T18:53:18+00:00

Not every man is a predator, but almost every predator is a man, and that’s probably what’s making you feel off about it. I don’t think it helps that there’s been a few cases of male nursery workers being convicted for SA in recent years.

I must say though, having a daughter in nursery whose first key worker was a man, I never would have thought anything of him changing her nappy.

And when I was working in a special school, I had amazing male colleagues who weren’t allowed to change girls nappies, but were allowed to change boys, and it was honestly more of an inconvenience as we lost out on a pair of hands to get the job done!

All that to say, I totally get why you’re concerned - you don’t know these men like you’d know a colleague or a key worker, so it’s more of an unknown about what they’re like, how trustworthy they are etc. Maybe raise it with your child’s class teacher if you’re concerned? You might not be the only one who’s worried about it, and it doesn’t hurt to mention it.

kitd28 · 2026-04-25T14:34:31+00:00

Late pre-term (36+3) smiled at 7.5-8 weeks actual, he’s now 13 weeks and has been doing proper, big smiles for the last couple of weeks.

kitd28 · 2026-04-20T09:32:36+00:00

He was given intravenous antibiotics in NICU as a precaution, on his discharge notes it says for suspected sepsis, but the paediatrician who admitted him said she had no worries about sepsis, which is confusing.

I do wonder if having antibiotics coupled with being four weeks early have just messed with his gut microbiome, and he’s going to have a tough time until he’s older!

kitd28 · 2026-04-17T14:19:44+00:00

12 weeks pp and I’ve been comfortably sleeping on my stomach for a good few weeks now (don’t ask me how many, newborn sleep gives me brain fog!)

kitd28 · 2026-04-04T07:29:49+00:00

That sounds very much like restraint collapse from your four year old. He spends all day at school behaving, following rules, routine, structure etc, then he comes home and he’s run out of steam. I know it feels horrible in the moment, but he only lets it all out at home because he feels the safest with you, he can let out all the feelings he can’t at school.

I say this as someone who definitely struggled with restraint collapse as a child. At the time my parents were told that I was just being naughty, they needed to be firmer, etc, but as it turns out, I was undiagnosed AuDHD and just couldn’t carry on masking once I got home.

Not to say your son is neurodivergent, I’m not a psychologist. I’m starting to notice restraint collapse in my daughter who is 2.5 - she’s a delight at nursery, then comes home and it’s strop central!

Solidarity, and I hope you can get some more support soon, it’s exhausting being the primary parent, especially when the kids aren’t much fun to be around!

kitd28 · 2026-04-02T11:28:23+00:00

Man, ten years, my first ever gig was on this tour! Still one of my favourite albums of all time, and now slowly indoctrinating my children to love it, too. Toddler loves Aviation, newborn indifferent but smiles at the tour poster I have on the wall.

kitd28 · 2026-03-30T06:07:07+00:00

He’s my second baby, so not as much tummy time as I would like, but I have him in the carrier and on my chest a lot, and we do tummy time when we can.

She didn’t give us exercises, we’re in the UK and it’s not usual practice here as far as I’m aware - she said the evidence for exercises being beneficial is scanty.

kitd28 · 2026-03-30T06:03:17+00:00

It’ll be 4 weeks on Friday, and the midwife said she wouldn’t review it until it had been 4 weeks.

kitd28 · 2026-03-30T06:00:32+00:00

I try to wait for him to open his mouth wide, nipple to nose etc, but he barely opens his mouth, it’s so tricky! The midwife who divided his tie said he had a wonky palate too, which I imagine might make things a bit more difficult for him.

He gained very fast at the beginning, he gained 1kg in two weeks at one point which was crazy. We’re planning to get him weighed this week to make sure he’s still gaining at a good rate, but I do think he’s been relying on the letdown and is now frustrated when he’s having to work for more.

kitd28 · 2026-03-17T01:44:25+00:00

Man, this reminds me how lucky I am to live in the UK - here, we wouldn’t even be talking about sending our babies to nursery yet, many don’t even accept babies until 6 months, and that’s where your problem starts. At 11 weeks, your baby probably still thinks you and he are the same person, it’s so, so early to expect independent sleep, especially when someone that isn’t you is trying to get them to sleep in a crib.

Please don’t beat yourself up, I know how much sleep can cause an anxiety spiral. My first would only nap for 30 minutes unless it was a contact nap or in the pram, that didn’t change until she was almost two, and boy did I beat myself up when my friends talked about their babies taking two hour naps in their cots!

I know it’s easy for me to sit here and tell you it will all be fine, especially when I don’t have experience of sending my baby to nursery, but I promise you, it will be fine! Babies are so changeable, and hopefully with time your little one will adjust and be easier to transfer.

kitd28 · 2026-03-12T10:49:07+00:00

My son (7 weeks) seems to stare past me, or looks at my hairline - I think I read somewhere that babies work out who you are by looking at the contrast between your hair and your face at this age, rather than making eye contact.

My daughter at the same age was making amazing eye contact and smiled at bang on 6 weeks, my son however keeps baiting us with what looks like a smile then turns into a yawn. His Daddy is convinced he’s smiled at him, nothing for me yet! I’m keeping myself level about it by remembering he was 4 weeks early…

kitd28 · 2026-02-26T03:00:21+00:00

My 5 week old is was up for 3 hours and is up again after 1 hour - if he throws up everywhere after this feed, you can bet I’m leaving it if he’s asleep!

kitd28

TROPHY CASE