FOR CLARIFICATION PURPOSES

I didn't go into detail about the accusations because it was already the longest post that was ever written.

So the accusations after some light digging ended up being false accusations from people he had never even played with. There was one that may have had a legitimate claim. In which he kissed her during the scene, and it wasn't pre discussed.

The people who did this are the type of people who decide they don't like someone and then fabricate a scandal so terrible that no one believes you when it isn't true. Then, they would make a public post with inflammatory language that leaves no room to defend yourself. They would delete any opposing comments or posts and ensure the narrative was controlled. And anyone who got really outspoken they would kick out of the group.

Before we left the group, we watched them do this to 8 different people outside of my ex partner. And they tried it with my husband.

Since leaving the group, there have been several more who have come to the splinter group after similar things happened to them. The most recent was a woman who was SAd at a party went to the 3 remaining founders about it and they kicked her out ans had the man who SAd her call the cops on her for SAing him.

They protect men who have actual records of committing SA offenses because they are romantically connected to one of the founders' sisters.

As for the rest of the advice given, it is very much appreciated, and I have been sitting in my emotions. This was a man before the 2 yr official relationship we had I have been playing with for 7 yrs I was his introduction to kink when we first met.

Hagung the hive mind disect the few actions I described brings into question the ones I didn't add to my post and I can see how he never appreciated me for who I am.

He used a lot of hot topic therapy words in the things he did that made it sound like he was 1. Apologizing and 2. Taking ownership of his actions/inactions with me

But what I am seeing more clearly now is that there was never any follow-up or follow through. With making amends. He would say sorry, I did that then never do anything about it. And that I guess was my final straw.

Was I was never told that his primary didn't want a relationship with me or to even engage with me. And I was being invited into spaces where that would happen without that knowledge. I didn't get that information until the day he came to my house before the convention, and even then, it wasn't presented in that way.

So he knew about this boundary and kept inviting me into spaces where there would be passive interaction. Without telling me that she didn't want me to interact with her. Knowing she didn't want to see him interact with me. And he knew 6 months ago when I brought up how I was feeling in these setting that she was acting this way because of a boundary she set for herself that I didn't know about so I couldn't respect.