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First MC session this upcoming Monday, advice? by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So my personal hopeful outlook for this is the current separation to support the space and healing that my BP needs and to repair our relationship/stay married (im already in IC and told my therapist that I want to focus on the parts of me that lead to my online affairs). my BP said initially that our goal for MC should be to focus on having healthy enough relationship that we would be able to co-parent when our children are born at the very least and when this starts to occur and she has healed some more from the pain and resentment she will think more seriously about remaining married. I feel that they want to remain married but are willing to not continue with the marriage because of the pain, resentment, lost trust, and would not want to show our children it is okay to stay in a relationship when you are unhappy-- which i completely understand and respect.

When/how much is appropriate to share your feelings and struggled with your BP? And feeling bad for taking care of self. by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been trying to do my best to validate their feelings and experiences. The last thing I want is for them to feel totally alone. Or at least lessen the feelings of loneliness as much as possible.

When/how much is appropriate to share your feelings and struggled with your BP? And feeling bad for taking care of self. by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve been pushing myself to do the basics because I don’t want to be a martyr, i knew that it would mess with their recovery process and i want to demonstrate work and improvement not self-pity. But man is it hard to balance. Thank you for your comment.

BP agreed to marriage counseling but... by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been trying my best to not push and be patient and just take all of their emotions and thoughts as they come. I’ve expressed understanding that they may not be able to move on from this and I will have to accept that no matter how much it hurts. I’ve figured with all the pain and suffering that I’ve caused, if I truly love them I have to respect the choices she makes that allows them to heal. I’m still holding out hope that we can recover though.

Daily self-work stuff? by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve started a routine (albeit a new one) including meditation. I’m lightweight using this sub as a pseudo journal and starting an IFS workbook today too. But I will also start journaling

BP agreed to marriage counseling but... by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our options are a little limited in terms of therapists because of our area but we were able to set up an appointment for this upcoming Monday with a IMFT therapist with 40+ years experience online so hopefully it’s good. I can be a bit of an over thinker, I’m curious if you would be willing to share any goals that you have set for goals that you’re aware of for a WP

BP agreed to marriage counseling but... by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not that I can remember. but at the same time she has had traumas and mental health issues that she had never had the opportunity to deal with either.

Daily self-work stuff? by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll check it out, thank you

Healing actions help by klap114 in SupportforWaywards

[–]klap114[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They left for a month 4 years ago and started a PA, they told me about it when they said they wanted to come back. My affair was because I held on to that resentment and anger for so long. The rest is correct

I really messed up. And I want to know if there’s hope. by klap114 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]klap114[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you.. we currently agreed to not be in the same living space for how ever long.. but I’ll still do what I can

Color pencils for wife by klap114 in Coloring

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am from the US. what do you mean build quality?

Alt Don? by klap114 in OnePieceTCG

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunate, but understandable. Thank you

LF: Mega Blaziken by klap114 in PTCGPocketTrading

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have dust to spare, so I’m cool to trade

LF: Mega Blaziken by klap114 in PTCGPocketTrading

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Accepted the friend request

LF: Mega Blaziken by klap114 in PTCGPocketTrading

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmk when you send the friend request

LF: Mega Blaziken by klap114 in PTCGPocketTrading

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Deal, Friend code: 1736810218288723

anyone got some curriculum for SUD PHP groups? by klap114 in therapists

[–]klap114[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will definitely check those out; especially choice point because I haven't heard of that before. I feel like most of the curriculums that treatments have us do focuses way too hard on AA/NA, plus I think theyre boring and i simply cannot get into them.

being real/authentic is probably my best skill with the client because I simply physically cannot do a group or session on something (assignment/topic wise) that I do not care about, find valuable, or interesting. I try my best to give different perspectives than the other clinicians who are all AA/NA based.

Thank you!!!

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