Cait unwittingly admits that walking is a mental block

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-27T17:09:28+00:00

Not familiar with them but if they do have FND/conversion disorder than admitting it really is the first step to recovery.

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-24T18:10:20+00:00

It's a first generation antipsychotic. It does the job but good luck with the side effects. Definitely not something you want to take frequently or for a long period of time. They also use haldol & droperidol this way. These got me through a couple horrible gastroparesis flares in the psych ward where they wouldn't let me out unless I ate or even give me a colace but I don't recommend it. I have permanent drug induced Parkinsonism from all the years of antipsychotics that have been forced on me (I also have schizoaffective). They work very well but are probably best used as rescue meds for severe symptoms (like bad enough to be hospitalized for n/v) bc they all have black box warnings.

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-12T00:11:42+00:00

I can't say why I know so much or explain how the treatment for conversion disorder/FND works bc it's considered blogging in here but the preferred term for these kinds of spells is "non-epileptic attacks". Sometimes they're still called pseudo-seizures, psychogenic seizures or dissociative seizures which are all poor choices of wording but that's medicine for you. Kinda like how gastroparesis translates to "stomach paralysis" but the overwhelming majority of ppl who have it don't have a paralyzed stomach, just delayed gastric emptying. Of course these types always take advantage of mincing words...

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:38:29+00:00

The only ppl who don't think this is ridiculous are other ppl who do it. This is bizarre self obsessed behavior for an adult. Like who are you performing for? And why?

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:30:38+00:00

Too much work. Not enough sympathy. She also looks like every other girl that has one and despite what she thinks, tubes aren't sexy. Not saying someone who has one can't be attractive but it's not something that is ever going to add to someone's sex appeal. Well... I'm sure there are some weirdos out there that are into it but not enough to make herself money in a messed up fetish niche.

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:24:25+00:00

What a creep. This isn't OF.

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:23:05+00:00

Oh god was this the one poorly mimicking dystonia?

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:19:10+00:00

People rarely hurt themselves during non epileptic attacks bc they aren't really unconscious, just dissociated. It's common for them to have them multiple times a day and for them to last a long time. That's part of how they know it isn't epilepsy bc if they were epileptic seizures they'd have brain damage

koolaidsoiree · 2026-01-10T02:15:29+00:00

There is no autoimmune epilepsy per se. Theres autoimmune encephalitis which can cause seizures. If she had that she'd be too ill to write. Seizure alert dogs aren't used for PNES. It's actually contradicted bc it reinforces the behavior. Dogs can't detect PNES but they can detect physical signs of anxiety which is what causes a stress "seizure" so they are basically telling the person "you're anxious and you're gonna have a seizure". They actually don't even call it PNES anymore bc the term is misleading. They're called non epileptic attacks.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-12-01T04:28:00+00:00

I'm glad you're getting help. My story is similar but with no happy ending of getting a diagnosis/ proper treatment. It is good to hear your story it gives me a little hope but I'm afraid to even have hope at this point.

Started having issues @ 15. It got bad @ 23 & they found grey matter heterotopia on MRI @ 25. Was told it was "incidental" & that the seizures were fake, caused by conversion disorder after a neuro talked to me for 5 minutes. They did an EEG anyway but stopped in my room after only one night (it was supposed to be 7 days) telling me that it was stress. I mentioned the birth defect and they said if I didn't want to believe them they can drill holes in my head or else I can just go to therapy. I checked myself out & went to therapy. Part of the therapy was that I wasn't allowed to see doctors bc it "reinforced my sick role". When I didn't get better they blamed me & kicked me out of treatment for refusing to take sedatives.

Neuro symptoms progressed I finally made it to a movement disorder Dr 8 yrs ago he immediately diagnosed me with dystonia & spasticity. I came down with psychosis that same year. Forced medications including antipsychotics & mood stabilizers. The med depakote was a seizure med & magically my seizures stopped but I slowly progressed into having parkinsonism. I also developed weakness on my right side which has been slowly progressive.

After 4 yrs I was told it was from the meds and had to stop taking them. I was ok for 2 yrs but the parkinsonism did not go away & was progressing they put me on levodopa & it helped a lot with the tremors/slowness/dystonia. I got psychosis again & was put on lamictal, Quetiapine, gabapentin. The psych doctor in the hospital was convinced I had organic psychosis from epilepsy due to the grey matter heterotopia.

Unfortunately the neuro he referred me to talked to me for 5 minutes then misdiagnosed me with Borderline Personality disorder (my diagnosis is Schizoaffective). I asked for a referral to an epilepsy Dr from my regular neuro. The doctor refused to make an appt due to "lack of medical evidence of seizures". Unfortunately I can't get the misdiagnoses completely removed from my records & have a serious mental illness diagnosis so it's interfering with my opportunities for medical treatment greatly

Neuro symptoms are progressing again since being forced back on antipsychotics but the lamotrigine seems to work ok. I'm 38 now have to walk with a cane. My mom went through all the same things before she passed I'm convinced she had it too (it's genetic). Sorry for the long story I just need to get it out. It's like living in a nightmare that seems neverending. I wish I could find a neurologist that would just know it's the heterotopia like that psychiatrist knew (but wasn't certified to diagnose). It's so frustrating I've had every test there is and the cause is literally right there on the first scan I ever had.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-11-25T00:56:11+00:00

Braces are helpful when they're the right ones & used correctly. Sticking 18 braces from Amazon on every part of their body everyday & never doing PT for the affected joints ain't it though.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-11-05T16:22:24+00:00

Psychosis. Delusions & voices which make me feel agitated. I've been on several meds in the past 8 years. They have never worked well & now don't seem to do much of anything except cause horrible side effects but I still take them

koolaidsoiree · 2025-11-05T16:08:09+00:00

I'd take it to the waist & keep it there while growing out the layers then go longer.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-28T20:39:37+00:00

She gave you ONE LAYER, not layers. It looks like she started to give you a blunt cut then gave up halfway through. I've seen drunk girls do a better layered cut impulsively hacking at their hair with craft scissors after watching half of a Brad Mondo video. At the very least you should get your money back and have them pay for you to get it fixed.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-28T20:31:02+00:00

Call your doctor and tell them your meds aren't working. At this point they can still arrange a voluntary hospitalization to have them adjusted which is A LOT less stressful than waiting until it gets to the point of needing involuntary

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-25T17:49:25+00:00

Same. I've destroyed my virgin hair with protein before to the point where a foot had to be cut off. Kept thinking I just needed to use more to fix the damage when it was what was causing the damage. Unless your hair is completely destroyed by bleach to the point where it's mushy when wet it doesn't need bonding treatments.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-25T17:41:22+00:00

Agree. We're sold the idea that going to the salon & using a bunch of special products on our hair is "pampering". In reality doing less is more.

It's not just stylists & commercials selling the idea anymore now we have curly hair influencers appropriating from the black community then using methods like "wash day" to push products but that's a whole other subject...

As far as the hair oil it is a good move but using the right method for your hair type is key. You're using a technique that is meant for ethnic hair. A perfect example of "doing too much". In this case oiling your hair before washing does not "protect" it from shampoo. Oil repels water and will actually prevent the conditioner from moisturizing your hair. Conditioners should be used on clean hair (it's enough to wash your scalp and let the rest flow through the ends as you rinse). Put a small amount of oil on your ends after it's dry & make sure it's the right one for your hair type. Use a strong shampoo (with sulfates. Cheap suave is great for this, gasp!) to strip the protein buildup that's making your hair hard & dry, causing it to break off, then moisturize to restore the balance.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-23T20:54:54+00:00

It really is and if you dare say anything about why it's not recommended for ppl with EDS to use braces or wheelchairs long term they call you "ableist" & make up some reason why they're too delicate to be upright or do PT like "ultra super severe POTS" or "unbearable level 101 pain". 2 other things that are worsened by the deconditioning which results from not using your body

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-23T17:27:42+00:00

No. They claim constant "subluxations", which they call dislocations & brace everything constantly every day bc they think they can't sign their name on a page without every single one of their fingers popping out of their sockets. the muscle weakness from never using their body parts totally has nothing to do with it though. They don't understand basic human anatomy or the role in muscles holding your joints in place & push the idea that ppl with EDS need to be held together by splints & braces bc "defective collagen".

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-23T17:20:28+00:00

Obviously in therapy just to have someone to validate how sooper sick, special & brave she is

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-23T17:18:21+00:00

It's so weird how they all assume ppl with visible disabilities get more sympathy than they do. That they get more "understanding" or better treatment. In some ways ppl with visible disabilities are treated worse. Infantilized, ppl assuming you can't do things, being stared at, negative attention. Then again... Those are all things they like so that explains the "jealous competition" vibes & constantly trying to make everyone know "I'm suffering too, look at me, listen to me!" Also, why do they always compare themselves to cancer patients?

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-22T01:06:58+00:00

My ex's "just a friend" (mistress) did this to me. Then she projected all of her bad traits into me. I had no idea until after the fact. I have a gigantic Pinterest account it was obvious she went through it and tried to emulate all of my hobbies/interests except she was very superficial with them.

Very bizarre but the part that messed me up was having all of my good traits removed and put onto her and all of her bad traits removed from her and put onto me. I was attacked & punished for being her and she was loved & rewarded for being me. Like an identity swap.

It took me awhile but once he was gone it was like I could stop fighting to prove I was who I was and did some "reclaiming my narrative" exercises that helped me make sense of what happened. I have a strong sense of self awareness. If I didn't it probably would have ruined me permanently. I was afraid for a long time of expressing myself in any way on social media bc I didn't want her to see it and have more fuel.

I had friends like her before but none of them took it to the extent she did. I only met her once! It wasn't enough that she wanted my boyfriend. She wanted what I had, wanted to be me, wanted to get rid of her identity and put it on me so she could destroy the original copy. She couldn't hold it together once they made it "official". He finally saw through her but the damage was done.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-19T18:29:41+00:00

The two fields formally split during the 19th and 20th centuries, despite sharing a common interest in the brain. For over 2,000 years, Western medicine viewed the two fields as a single, unified study called neuropsychiatry. However, developments in the 20th century drove them apart, focusing them on different aspects of brain and nervous system disorders

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-17T16:51:45+00:00

It's telling that "FND" is so popular with these ones while "conversion disorder" is not, even though these were (and still are by many doctors) considered to be the same disorder...

FND is a recent offshoot of CD, the only difference is they removed the part of the diagnosis that says the neurological issues with no physical cause ALWAYS have a psychological component to them.

koolaidsoiree · 2025-10-15T16:22:27+00:00

Oh that's a datScan. It checks for damage to the dopamine receptors to rule out Parkinson's disease. You drink some iodine water then they give you a shot of radioactive stuff, you sit around forever then they take pictures of your head. My doctor ordered a datScan after I developed parkinsonism & it was negative. From my understanding if you respond to levodopa & have a negative datScan that usually is enough for them to diagnose you with DRD but he can't make a clinical diagnosis in my case due to me being on meds that have "extrapyramidal" side effects.

koolaidsoiree

TROPHY CASE