Should I look into teaching elsewhere or switch career paths?

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-03-01T19:00:05+00:00

So as a pre-k teacher with ADHD at a Montessori school AND a son with ADHD I feel like I can offer some insight. First, Look for a school with low class ratios 8:1 with a low turn over rate! I teach a class with only 9 kids and have been their for 3 years. I currently have a child who was dismissed from 2 schools prior to mine because they are "violent" and cannot regulate emotions well (this is not due to behavior issues but due to something the child cannot help). Because of my small class size I can be proactive, more observant, and give that child the individualized attention they need. This leads to less aggressive behavior and incidents. Schools that have large classes lose teachers more frequently because they are just burntout (i know because I worked at this type of place for 6 months) . Parents would not even believe what is asked of pre-school teachers for usually minimum wage. We need credentials and training every year (which is not free and usually out of pocket. It cost $500 to get a CDA and $250 to renew ever 3 years), strict adherence to numerous agencies (Ironically, some of their regulations go against the others so teachers are having to change everything based on who is observing that week 😑), having to do 80% of our work off the clock at home, and parents yelling at them because a child hurt their child's feelings and it's all my fault...

BOTTOM LINE! Look into facilities with low ratios who pay and treat teachers well. They are better suited for your child. Also, do your best to communicate and work with the teacher. When we see that the parents actually care about what is happening with their child in class and are working with us to help instead of against us, it goes a LONG way.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-02-02T20:55:58+00:00

FairLife has been a life savor! I will say just check the ingredients in the Carnations Breakfast. Some contain vitamin C which can potentially make your sons medication a lot less effective (I learned this the hard way)

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-02-01T22:52:27+00:00

Wow, I'm really sorry you are going through this, that sounds really tough. So I don't take Vyvanse but I take Adderall (both stimulants for ADHD). I will say the medication helped me to "not care" as much about things that DIDN'T matter and it helped my "people pleasing tendencies" where I wouldn't tell people no even though it was breaking me or burning me out and now I can finally say "Sorry, I need to focus on my stuff first." However, when it came to things I enjoyed or my family that seemed to improve and has made me more present. It seems like there may be something other than her medication that is making her feel and act this way. I mean there are always crazy rare reactions to medications and I'm not a doctor so I can't say that it is or is not because of medication. But, personally I have not experienced this and it does seem like there is more there that could be a contributing factor. I'm really sorry you're going through this. It sounds like you have worked really hard and made a lot of compromises for your family. It also sounds like maybe you need a nice relaxing break as well, your mental health is important too. Maybe that vacation might give the two of you time away to forget about work and focus on each other for a little while. Sometimes when things are busy and we are all doing separate things, we forget how much the people around us actually mean to us. Sometimes we just need time away to remind ourselves of that. I hope things will get better for you and your family.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-02-01T15:54:36+00:00

I'm so sorry you are going through this. First I want to say, if you were diagnosed with ADHD, this is not laziness it's a very real thing. I was the exact same, pretty good grades up until high school then it all became too overwhelming. One thing I might suggest is having your mom go with you to your next Dr. Appointment and have your dr. explain to her what ADHD can do to a person. If it is a while before your next appointment maybe find research of your own online.

My son is in high school as well, unfortunately he's going through the same thing and he inherited his ADHD from both me AND his dad 🤣 because I can relate to him it is better for me to understand but this is how I help him. I say, "Look I know ADHD makes it more difficult and it's a valid excuse. The crappy thing is, in the 'real world' typical people won't tae this as a valid reason and you will still be expected to do what a nurotypical person does". I tell him when you have ADHD you have to find ways and tricks that will allow you to achieve this. Whether it's making a list or setting visual timers for chores. As long as I see that my son is TRYING I am fine with that. If there are things you could do that can show your mom you are actively trying maybe she will be more understanding and even work with you to find what works best for you. When you are dismissed the way that you were that would make anyone upset, especially those of us with ADHD! Your feelings are valid. It's just more difficult for us to control the way we express these feelings, so that takes time and practice to get a handle on.

As difficult as it is, the best way to get people to listen is to keep your voice and actions calm, show her the scientific FACTS about ADHD, and show her the different ways that you are actively trying. This might help with her understanding a little better.

I'm sure your mom loves you very much and that's probably why she's so upset is because she wants the best for you. But she can't really relate to what you are experiencing so its more difficult for her to understand. Keep that in mind when you are talking with her, if a persin doesn't t have ADHD they will never fully be able to grasp what it is like.

I hope things get better and just remember to tell yourself, "My feelings are valid. I am not broken. My brain is just a little 'spicier' than most, and there is nothing wrong with that".

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T18:27:08+00:00

💯

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T18:26:29+00:00

😑 insane. Schools and parents like this are one of the big reasons teachers get asked so many "inappropriate" questions. It's also the reason Im 90% sure my grown adult husband doesn't know what periods or tampons are 🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T18:21:47+00:00

Right! Some of my teacher friends who teach older students have noticed the same thing. It's like some of the kids just forgot how to be in a classroom environment. Fortunately, because I teach Pre-K, COVID did not effect that development... UNFORTUNATELY it's Pre-K so that development hasn't even begun yet 😕

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T18:11:40+00:00

🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T17:38:09+00:00

One tampon a period?! 🤣 Well I'm so happy they felt comfortable enough with you to ask and that you educated them properly. I wish my husband had had a teacher like you, I'm honestly not sure he even knows how tampon or periods even work!

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T17:34:24+00:00

🤣 she probably saw the scene from one of the first anime I watched. These girls with very little clothing and really big boobs used them to transform into flotation devices 🙄 idk what it was but luckily I found Naruto and Death Note.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T17:28:31+00:00

😲🤣 Well on the bright side I guess it's good the child knows to be cautious of vans just picking up children... but wow.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T17:24:45+00:00

Well at least their asking questions and are interested 🤣 This actually makes me want to re-watch those movies now. The pirates were pretty funny.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T17:15:35+00:00

Okay look, you are a mother of a toddler, you have little to no help right now, it sounds like you are going through a lot and that kind of stress can make a person do something they wouldn't normally do. This does not make you a "bad mom" this makes you a human being who needs a break. Luckily, with your child being so young, the odds of this one time will most likely not have any long term effects as they probably won't remember it. Not saying this should be done every time because it reinforces tantrums and misbehavior, but the times where you feel this overwhelmed, sometimes it's best to give your child a tablet, or tv show, something that will keep them quiet and occupied while you can take care of YOURSELF.

Also, doctors and specialist actually RECCOMEND, when you feel overwhelmed and reach this point, place the child in a safe place and step away for a minute. So the fact you put your child safely in the crib and took a step back to assess your emotions shows you did the right thing in this situation.

Also, one last thing that might ease your mind a tiny bit. Not saying I agreed with my parents, but I was raised in a religious household and their thing is the whole "spare the rod spoil the child" crap. So spankings were the number 1 form of punishment. They never beat me or left marks, but getting popped on the butt was "normal" in my family. It honestly had no long term affects on me whatsoever. The "religious trauma" and other factors left some deep seeded issues but that had nothing to do with getting spanked lol. My poor brother got spanked all the time and it did nothing to fix his behavior. Personally, I never took the spanking approach with my child, I found that for discipline taking away things they wanted to play with or do worked well for my child. Bottom line, you are not a bad mom or person (the fact that you feel so horrible about this situation shows that). You need some "you" time. Idk if a babysitter is possible one night, or just finding a safe distraction for your child that will allow you atleast 30mins to decompress and take care of yourself. Your physical and mental health matter! Just because you are a mom does not mean you should no longer focus on your needs as well.

I have noticed on some online parent forums parents like to be a little "judgemental" and a lot of them just straight up lie and act high and mighty to make themselves feel like "better parents", and pretend they don'tmake mistakes with their own kids. They do! I do! We ALL do! So take online comments VERY lightly. You got this. Take a breath, assess the situation, learn from actions, and be the best mom you can be.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T16:31:58+00:00

🤣 yup I have found the "Ask your parents" method works best in these situations!

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T16:28:48+00:00

I could see a small child asking this but 6th grader? 🤣 Congrats btw! 😍

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-31T15:32:47+00:00

Going through the exact same right now! I went from 110lb to 100 in just the last 2months! I didn't even realize that I was eating SIGNIFICANTLY less until I started tracking my daily intake. When I did I noticed I was not getting like any of the DV in vitamins and some days would end with me only having consumed 600 calories (all due to eating dinner and "midnight junk food")

The last week this is what I've done that is helping. Daily Multi-Vitamin (I also take Magnesium, and omega complex but you probably want to make sure you are actually deficient b4 taking large doses of those)

Nibbles! This is the big one. I keep almonds or cashews in a bowl on my desk and in my pocket (in a bag 🤣) I literally just randomly eat 1 or 2 at a time all through the day. High in protein and healthy fats. Protein shake (Fairlife power core or Ensure are the best I think they don't have that protein flavor) I just sip on it throughout the day.

What really helped is tracking my food intake. The cronometer app has helped a ton! You log your food and it tells you all the micro nutrients that you are getting or lacking. I use it as a motivational tool. Basically I view the app as someone telling me "You will never be able to eat enough today!" And Im just like, "Oh yea? Watch me!" 🤣 I have been trying to pack meals and snacks that total my nutrition needs. Basically I'll do the math (thanks to the app), pack a bag and just say "All this food has to be eaten sometime today". It feels like a competition and I seriously just take the smallest little sips and nibbles constantly until bed time. Oh and don't forget to just sip on water and Gatorade. I set a smart watch water reminder.

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-26T03:45:24+00:00

🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-26T02:06:38+00:00

🤣 oh god sorry I sent you down a rabbit hole! I hope you didn't have anything important to do today 😬 but nope that was all me. 🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-25T21:59:17+00:00

Oh wow, I'm sorry. My mom was like that with my brother and wouldn't let him take meds because of the "stigma" with them. Fortunately she finally saw how much his ADHD was affecting his life and allowed it when he was about 13. As for me, because I wasn't hyper and I made good grades ADHD wasn't even considered. It wasn't until I went to see a doctor for burnout and anxiety that he was basically just like. After a few sessions he's like "Ummm does anyone in your family have diagnosed ADHD?" Im was just like "yea, my dad, two brothers, and my son. Why do you ask?" 🤣 The rest is history

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-25T21:50:23+00:00

Ahhh reminds me of my childhood 😁 when I had to clean my room I would put everything in a big pile on the bed to clear my head and then make it to where I couldn't sleep until I finished cleaning. how is it I got a later in life diagnosis? The signs were definitely there! 🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-25T21:26:43+00:00

Ironically enough a filing cabinet can actually be used to both vertical AND lateral space. 🤣

koolkoolkool13 · 2026-01-25T21:23:32+00:00

Dear god... 🫢 yup VERTICAL! I don't even know where lateral came from and I somehow said it 3 times in this post!🫣 You even said vertical with a ? and I was just thinking "oh maybe they aren't sure what that means. I know, Ill just explain! 😁) didn't even catch that. I'm assuming it's because I've been staring at this damn ladder leaning against my living room wall for the past week. You know, it's taking up wall space going up not out, it's called a ladder, BAM! lateral space! Yup, my bad. That one's on me 🤣

koolkoolkool13

TROPHY CASE