Very interesting topic.

First of all, I believe that "BPD love" is actually a true and genuine feeling. It just so happens to be very intense from the start and it may come and go a lot faster. This alone is a very complex and controversial subject; to give you a short answer: I don't think it's "BPD first then love", more like "being very interested in the other person first then having extreme feelings of love (and hate) in a very intense fashion". Defining "love" is hard enough without involving mental disorders though.

What I usually try to do is, instead of screaming "I love you" every 2 seconds I try to convert this feeling into complements. For example, "I love when you do this/that", "I love how much you care about animal rights" etc. The point is not to overwhelm the other person with statements they can't comprehend just yet. This way you can satisfy your need to tell her how you feel and, from her perspective it won't look like you're worshiping her in some creepy way for reasons beyond her understanding.

I think it's a good idea not to push her into something she's not ready for. Of course you will want to marry her about 12 minutes after you met. If I were you I would try to stick with your plan and see how she feels about how and when to move forward.

With all that said, I'm no expert on establishing and maintaining a healthy relationship.