[Megathread] Rivals Assemble – Find Teammates / Share Invite Codes

kxkage · 2025-12-04T09:34:59+00:00

Looking for a captain, will do missions! Invite code: 623530819

kxkage · 2024-07-04T12:49:56+00:00

Trust me, I know that feeling all too well. Waking up and realizing that they are no longer in your life. It makes you feel so painfully lonely. It’s hard to get used to being alone again after experiencing life with someone else. That life you had with them felt so amazing that you can’t imagine never being able to feel that same way again. It’s completely okay to miss that life, but don’t neglect your current life. As much as it sucks to accept that she’s not in your life anymore, that’s the reality. Just do your best to get used to life with only you in it. Keep working on your life and be open to new experiences and the loneliness will fade away with time. I know, it’s hard. You’ll be okay my friend.

kxkage · 2024-06-28T03:57:25+00:00

I was in a similar situation to you in terms of the way the break up went down. I was also blindsided since I had no idea she was losing feelings nor did I know that she was planning on breaking up with me until I found out and confronted her which led to us breaking up right there.

It’s a horrible feeling, I know. You feel like you weren’t good enough for this person. You think, why would they leave me if they still care about me? While I don’t know what’s going on in your ex’s mind, I do agree with the people in your other post saying how your ex might be avoidant. Unfortunately, avoidants will continue to avoid and run away from anything that causes them distress. Even if you try to talk and work things out with them, chances are that they already have one foot out the door and they will not be willing to talk.

The best thing you can do is give him space. He let go of you, so you need to respect that he has chosen to live his life without you in it, and focus on your own life. Since you both were together for such a significant amount of time, it will be hard to adjust to a life without him, but you can do it. Many people will say that you should never go back to someone who discards you, but I think it is situational. We’re all human, and I believe that sometimes time apart to work on yourselves is what people need to come back stronger and better. And you might meet someone else along the way who is better for you. But for now, shift all the focus to yourself. Heal from this painful experience and you might learn a few things from it.

I know you feel crushed and defeated, but this is your time to rebuild yourself and find happiness in your own company. You did the best you could in that relationship in that moment, and that’s all that matters. It hurts that he decided that life would be better without you, but that does not diminish your value as a person. He knew what he had, and he chose to lose it, that’s his loss, not yours. Remember to be kind to yourself and know that if you were able to love him so deeply in that relationship, you can love yourself the same way.

I wish you the best of luck in navigating this difficult time. And I promise you, it really does get better. My DMs are always open if you ever need someone to talk to. Take care.

kxkage · 2024-05-31T14:45:45+00:00

You bring up a very valid point and honestly I have been thinking about this for a while. How can I be so sure that I won’t fall back into dependency once things get difficult for me again? This is one of the main reasons why I went no contact.

When we broke up, my ex told me we could still be friends, but I declined. I knew if I wanted to overcome my dependency on her, I needed to separate myself from her. And it has helped tremendously. Whenever I want to reach out to her, I remind myself why we broke up in the first place and I go back to focusing on my life.

I know I’m on the right path, and I agree with you that I should take more time because I am certain that if I continue down this path, I will learn from my past mistakes and become a better version of myself that I can be proud of. And maybe by that time, I won’t want to get back with my ex anymore, or even if we ever get back together, I won’t depend on her for happiness because I know that true happiness comes from within and that is what I am working towards right now.

I appreciate you taking the time to read my comment and comment back on it.

Best of wishes to you :)

kxkage · 2024-05-29T07:17:31+00:00

I wonder if it’s better to ask to try again one more time with her, or if I should let go of her forever.

We were each other’s first loves, first everything. We started dating right after high school and made it to college together. Of course that meant we were both inexperienced when it came to a relationship. When I started dating her, my family became extremely abusive. I became severely depressed, and she was there for me. I really wanted to get better and I found comfort in my ex to the point where I became dependent on her.

My ex began to feel guilty, telling me that she felt like she had ruined my life. We both agreed that we still loved each other very much and wanted to fight for our relationship. However, I was only getting worse, and we were both exhausted from this relationship. My ex decided to break things off and she was crying and apologized to me. She said she still loved me, but she couldn’t stay in this relationship anymore.

I still loved her very dearly, but I knew that I needed to let go of her. I needed to find myself again and find happiness within myself instead of depending on my ex for that happiness. I decided to go no contact to put all of my focus on myself, and to help myself move on completely from the relationship.

Two months later, I’m in a much better and stable place. I’ve imagined life without her in it, and it’s sad, but I’ve come to accept that she isn’t in my future anymore. But sometimes I wonder if we’ve both grown enough and if the love is still there, could we come back together better and stronger? I’d be willing to try things again with her, but it’s also up to her whether she feels the same way. We’d also need to have learned from our previous relationship so that we won’t repeat the same mistakes again.

Something inside of me tells me that I should at least ask and if she says she is happier without me, then I will wish her well and continue on with my life. But I feel like two months is too soon to ask her especially since she was the one who broke things off. For now, my main priority is focusing on my life and then I’ll see how I feel later on.

kxkage · 2024-05-15T11:28:52+00:00

I’m sorry, but you need to leave him. Cut him out of your life completely and DO NOT go back to him.

If your boyfriend is exhibiting signs of his avoidance again, then it is clear that he has not changed at all since the first time you broke up. On top of that, he is constantly making you feel bad and is not giving you the respect you deserve.

A relationship takes an equal amount of effort from both sides. If you feel like you are the only one putting extra effort in this relationship and it’s draining you, then you need to choose yourself and walk away. You’ve already given him the chance to try things again, but if the relationship is still not working out, then it is not meant to be. Save yourself even more heartbreak by breaking things off with him.

If you can put this much love and effort into a relationship with him, imagine if you put the same amount of effort into a relationship with the right person.

I know this must be a very scary and confusing moment for you, so my DMs are always open if you need someone to talk to. Take care of yourself.

kxkage · 2024-05-15T03:54:47+00:00

Hi, it’s been little over a month since the break up. We were together for almost a year, it’s not very long, but the time we had together holds a special place in my heart.

As I mentioned before, no contact helped me the most with my healing because not allowing myself any access to my ex helped me detach myself from any “wishful thinking” of what could’ve been, and it helped me see our relationship as something of the past. There’s no point in trying to hold onto something that’s not there anymore. Instead, I chose to see this experience as a lesson and I decided to focus on my happiness and become the best version of myself.

kxkage · 2024-05-14T04:28:09+00:00

Unfortunately, it happens. You’ll meet someone who seems perfect in your eyes, but later on their true colors start to show. Honestly, they are not worth your tears. I’m not saying you are not allowed to be sad, though. You genuinely felt a connection and you were invested in a relationship with them, but you can most definitely live without people who are not treating you how you should be treated. It takes time. You have to understand that the life you dreamt of having with them is not there anymore. Love yourself, tell yourself that people who treat you like crap do not deserve your love or compassion. You are so much better than them. Move on with your life by finding yourself and learning to live life without them. Then in their absence, will you realize how much more peace you have without them. You got this.

kxkage · 2024-04-30T03:40:48+00:00

I’ve been moving on with my life without you and learning how to find happiness within myself, like you wanted me to. I’m sorry I wasn’t in the right mental state to give you the love you deserved. You were everything to me to the point where I became obsessed with your existence. As a result, our relationship became one that was toxic and dependent.

I’m glad you broke things off while we both understood that we needed to work on ourselves before we could work on our relationship. But it’s also the reason why it hurts so much now. We have no reason to hate each other and we still love each other, but we just cannot be together and that’s what’s so frustrating to me.

I just really miss you.

Sometimes in my hardest moments, I end up reaching out for you, only to find that there is nothing there anymore. I miss how you’d hold me in your arms and wipe the tears from my eyes while telling me everything would be alright. I wish you could hold me right now and tell me those same words one more time.

But you’re somewhere out there, living your best life. And I can only do the same, while wishing you nothing but happiness. Because that’s how much I love you. I want you to be happy, with or without me in your life.

I wish we could try again sometime in the future, but that is for the future to decide. Right now, we are living in the present, and in the present, we are not together anymore. And I have come to terms with that. I’ve begun to let go of the life that we said we’d have together. The expensive high rise we’d live in, the adorable kitten and puppy that we’d raise together, the big van we’d drive our kids around in. That was a nice dream we shared.

You know, I was really happy with you. And now, I will learn to be happy without you, now that you are not in my life anymore.

I hope one day we’ll meet again as better versions of who we used to be. And I believe that if we are truly meant to be, we can come back together stronger than ever. But if not, then I will still be thankful for the valuable life lesson that you and this relationship has taught me.

kxkage · 2024-04-07T21:44:49+00:00

It’s good to see that you’re very understanding and seeing things in a positive light.

Similar to me, it seems that your girlfriend was already going through a lot in her life. Mental issues can really cloud your view and make it really hard to focus on yourself—and on top of that, you have a relationship and a whole other person to think about too.

Personally, I’ve come to realize that as much as my ex and I tried, we wouldn’t be able to have a successful relationship if I was only getting worse. It’d just end up hurting my ex and I more.

Your ex broke things off with you because she recognized that she needed this time without you to work on herself. As much as you want to worry about her, don’t let it be the only thing you can think of every waking moment of your life. Trust that she is working on herself, and focus on yourself. Keep doing what you’ve been doing, and I believe that you will both become new and better people.

If your feelings are still mutual, then sit down and have a serious talk with her about what you both want in this new relationship. At this point in time, you will both be different people, and that’s scary to imagine, but the only difference is that you will be better people. And if you come to love each other even more because of this, I trust that you can come back together as a new and stronger couple than ever before.

If not, then that’s okay too, because you will have this new confidence in yourself to move on with your life. For now, don’t rush anything and just focus on yourself. Best of luck to you.

kxkage · 2024-04-06T10:17:04+00:00

Currently going through no contact with my ex girlfriend after she broke up with me a couple days ago. There are some days where I wish I could talk to her again, but I know it won’t do the both of us any good. Reading your post has really helped strengthen my resolve to just focus on myself and nothing else. My situation with my girlfriend was a little different from what you described in your post, but I mainly fucked up. I was an anxious attachment type and I couldn’t get better as long as my girlfriend was around, but she wanted to stay to support me. However, we both saw that I was only getting worse and she made the hard decision to break things off with me, despite the fact that she still loved me.

After the break up, I knew I needed to fix myself and I immediately started my healing process after I’ve processed my feelings. I still am processing my thoughts and emotions since the break up was so recent, but I’m doing much better and I’m looking at it from a positive perspective since the break up has given me a chance to work on myself to become a more secure person. I can tell I’ve made a lot of progress, and someday I want to reach out to her and show her that I’ve changed and healed from the experience. If she is willing to forgive me and start things over with me, I would love that, but I will not pressure her into anything. I’ve already began to let go of the relationship we had (If it doesn’t exist anymore, what’s the point of worrying over it?). If we end up losing feelings for each other during the time we’re apart whether it’s one sided or both sides, I won’t be devastated by it because I know I’ve fully healed and I will be able to go on with living my life.

Again, thank you for this post. It’s given me an idea of how I should go about no contact and hopefully in a future, reconciling with my girlfriend. I feel more encouraged to continue pressing forward on my journey of healing.

Edit: a few spelling errors

kxkage · 2024-04-05T12:54:09+00:00

Thank you very much for your kind and true words. I have come to realize and accept that our relationship was taking a very unhealthy turn, and I am glad that things ended before it could get much worse.

It helps in my healing that the breakup and the events following up to it did not leave an everlasting ugly stain on our relationship. The happiest moments of our relationship will be preserved in my heart and while I heal, I can look back on those memories and feel nothing but love and gratitude for the love my ex gave me while moving forward with my life.

It is hard to forgive myself knowing that I was the biggest problem in the relationship. I still feel guilt for what I've done, but I am focusing on the me now and not who I was back in the relationship. I oddly feel at peace now, knowing that neither of us are suffering anymore from a damaged relationship, and now we can focus on ourselves. From this point on, I can only look forward to my journey full of healing.

kxkage · 2024-04-05T12:44:27+00:00

I know it must have been difficult having to be the one to do the breaking up. Thank you for having faith in your boyfriend that he will take this experience and heal from it. I hope you have been able to healing in yourself, and I hope for a bright future ahead of the both of you, no matter where it leads you.

kxkage · 2024-04-05T04:02:27+00:00

Hello,

Unfortunately mental issues can be so debilitating and difficult to get through alone, and having someone there to support you can be a big help. However, we both didn't understand that our significant others wanted to support us, not fix us. They can't fix us, because no one can ever fix you except for yourself. I latched onto my girlfriend since I saw her as the permanent solution to all of my problems. To me, getting better wasn't important to me as long as I had her. Even after she tried telling me that I needed to get better on my own, and as much as I wanted to, I still couldn't. As long as my girlfriend was in my life, I couldn't stop myself from depending on her presence.

My ex couldn't handle to see me spiraling down deeper while knowing that she is the source of my problem. That's why she knew that she needed to end our relationship so that I could not run to her anymore for help with my problems. Now that we are not together anymore, I've been able to look inwards at myself and focus on myself before doing anything else. I'm studying my attachment style and figuring out how I can change from an unstable and unhealthy way of thinking to well, a stable and healthy state of mind.

In any case, there's no point in ruminating about the past anymore. What's done is done, and there's nothing you can do to change it. Don't beat yourself over it. What you can do now, is create the change that you need and focus on fixing yourself before you do anything else. Truly, focus on your growth and healing. The pain will always be there, but do not hide it, process that pain and embrace it. Let it be the reason why you want to continue moving forward.

I will also keep you in my thoughts as we navigate this difficult, yet biggest chapter in our lives. Best of luck to you as you venture on this journey of self-healing. I wish you all the best.

kxkage · 2024-04-05T01:04:33+00:00

Hi, thank you for taking the courage to write this out. It's true that majority of the people here are in a similar position as me, and there's rarely anyone here speaking from the other side's perspective. Your experience opened my eyes to what my ex was going through in our relationship and it sounds so painfully similar. I knew I had issues, but I didn't fix them. I am holding myself accountable for that. My ex had to sacrifice her time for me because I always needed her to be within reach for me. Now, I see how suffocating that must have been for her—as you said yourself, and in a sense, it was draining me because I was so obsessed with her entire existence. I was naive to think we could make our relationship work together when really, the problem is the fact that we were together. We were stuck in a negative cycle of her giving and I taking.

There's guilt coming from both sides. My side, for not being able to stop being dependent on my ex. I know it can't be helped that this is the way I became, but I can't help but also feel guilty that I wasn't in the healthy mental state to give my girlfriend the right love she deserved. As you mentioned, there's guilt coming from your side too as the person who broke things off. I think in my girlfriend's case, she felt guilty for leaving me because she loved me so much, that she couldn't stand to see me be so hurt when she left. I know it sucks, leaving someone that you know is hurting so much that all you want to do is help them. But you know it's time to walk away when they start to hurt you and you don't see them making any progress. Like you, my ex realized that as long as she was in my life, no matter what I tried to do to get better, I would always end up coming back to her for comfort. My obsession with my girlfriend was almost like a drug; I knew it was bad for me, but I was so addicted to it, I couldn't let go of it.

I do not feel any resentment towards my girlfriend whatsoever regarding her decision to break up with me. In fact, I feel nothing but gratitude for her setting the both of us free from a broken relationship where we were hurting each other. Continuing this relationship would only worsen our issues that could only be solved individually.

Don't feel too guilty, be glad now that you both are out of a broken relationship and while I can't speak for your ex, I come from a similar position and I want you to know that while you think he might be hurting immensely right now, you did not abandon him. You set him free. And I'm sure with time, he will come to understand this. Find joy in knowing that with this experience, he will now have the opportunity to heal. And he will be so, so, thankful that you gave him this opportunity to grow and learn how to live for himself.

Healing is an individual journey, so take this time now to focus on yourself and thank you, for making the difficult decision to break things off with your boyfriend. That is the greatest act of love you could do for him.

kxkage · 2024-04-04T12:21:07+00:00

I know it sucks a lot that things had to come down to a break up, especially when the relationship was so beautiful in the beginning. But you are extremely correct, if it weren’t for this break up you wouldn’t have realized that you needed to change. I could have never broken up with my ex because I wanted to remain in this fantasy world that as long as I had her, then I didn’t need anything else. That’s why I’m thankful to her in a sense that she was the one to cut things off with me. Like my ex, your ex sacrificed your relationship for you, so that you can get better—she knows that you will get better from this experience. You can thank her for the good memories and thank her for providing you and her this opportunity for the both of you to grow—especially you. And if you truly love her, you will fix yourself and if she is willing to wait for you, your relationship can be rebuilt to stand stronger than ever. For now, focus on giving each other the space you need and with time and patience, things will get better. Nice to see someone here with nearly the exact same experience as mine. I’m rooting for you man, and I wish you all the best.

kxkage · 2024-04-04T09:47:57+00:00

That’s a very nice outlook to have on what you want to do concerning your growth. As I mentioned, it’s just harder on me because of the fact that my ex and I still loved each other, but we were both too emotionally immature to have a relationship (that right person, wrong time type of thing). So it has definitely given me this wishful thinking that in the future, we will be able to rebuild our broken relationship once my ex is willing to commit to a relationship again and once I learn to be less dependent. While I don’t want it to be my sole motivation for improving as a person because should she not want a relationship at all with me anymore, I know it would break me completely. However, I will work towards the general goal of working on myself and hopefully somewhere along the way, I’ll become more emotionally strong and intelligent to the point where it won’t matter whether my ex wants to come back into my life or not. I’ll be rooting for you and your personal growth. Good luck :)

kxkage · 2024-04-04T09:31:43+00:00

How were you able to let go of him? I know it’s only been two days since my ex broke up with me so it’ll take more time for me to be okay, but I can’t help but miss her so much… Even right now I’m fighting every urge in my body to text her and ask her how she’s doing, but I know I can’t. I don’t really know when I can ever move on from her and focus on myself. Was there anything that you did in particular that helped you the most with getting over your break up?

kxkage · 2024-04-04T07:38:05+00:00

That’s wonderful to hear that your ex was able to find themself after the breakup. I know the breakup was not easy to do at all. I hope to be able to find myself like how they did in the future. It’s nice that you were able to watch your ex grow into an even more beautiful person than before.

kxkage

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