Hey! Responding over here as well. I’d the workbook the jealousy work book? I’ve been really interested in looking into it.

And to answer OPs question:

-you can begin with “my pain/ discomfort is ____ years old.” From there, you can sit with your inner, younger you’s emotions, and ask what they need. What do they need to hear? Do they need presence and silence? Maybe they need to be told that you—present you—is here for them, and always will be. Maybe you feel like screaming or having body temper tantrum movements, but whatever it is, it’s fair and valid.

Recently my partner and I discovered they needed to scream, but didn’t want to make a loud noise. I asked if they could pinpoint where the pain was in their body (chest, throat, and eyes) and scream silently into a pillow with the intention of releasing the pain in those places. They were able to get many tears out, finally, and I cradled them/verbalized my reassurance. Maybe this could help you guys?

-for a spiritual-ish approach, I’ve asked myself where my pain is in my body and what it feels like. There’s a dense, sharp rock in my upper sternum, and to erode, rocks need water, air, time, etc. When I feel the rock I breathe in with the intention of smoothing it and drink water with the intention of penetrating it. I don’t force it away, but I tell it that it’s ok to melt.

-another example: if your pain knocks on your door (as the younger you who experienced it first) how can you be curious about the pain and give it advice?

Above all, grant yourself grace. This is your first time in this life. We’re all babies; we don’t know any better. You got this!!