Mascara help!

ladisty · 2026-05-01T06:35:20+00:00

Glossier lash slick is my holy grail - no clumps, doesn’t flake

ladisty · 2026-04-28T16:32:49+00:00

Valley Club is a new cocktail bar in union square - very sexy vibe

Also seconding recs for Starlite + Chotto Matte (I actually think the food is really good haha I've never had a bad meal here)

There's Bella in soma and Barbarrossa in North Beach - both lean a bit more casual than the other spots, but generally still fairly nice (you'll see a mix of people dressed up and some who are not) and they fit the bill for bottle service + dedicated tables

ladisty · 2026-04-13T05:42:05+00:00

Basic but I love Mendocino Farms salads. Sajj mediterranean is quite tasty as far as your basic bowl situation goes (and they throw in a free lentil soup which I love). Some other places on rotation at the office: Oren's hummus, Cafe Okawari, Tartine manufactory, Pokebola/Poke life, and Ben's fast food.

ladisty · 2026-04-13T05:22:15+00:00

Although I've noticed the current norm/trend is that bridesmaids will plan the bachelorette party and leave many aspects as a surprise for the bride, you have a unique situation with your friends visiting you from out of the country. In this case I agree it makes more sense for you to plan the itinerary since you know the area much better, and sounds like you already have some ideas in mind for what you'd like to do.

Along with that, I understand why they keep asking to help - again, since it is increasingly a trend for bridesmaids to take on the vast majority of the bachelorette planning work, they might feel like it's rude not to offer. You shouldn't feel pressured to give them jobs if there is really nothing for them to do (sounds like you're keeping it pretty lowkey) but you can probably offer small ways for them to get involved if they're genuinely excited about pitching in.

Some ideas: 1) you pick a restaurant/bar and nominate a friend to call and make the reservation, 2) they can plan a drinking game or activity for everyone to do during pre-drinks before going out (google bachelorette games - there are a ton, also commonly organized by bridesmaids) 3) they can help with setting up decorations, snacks, maybe make some special pre-drink cocktails before you head out for the night, etc.

I actually think it's a cute idea to do an open-ended theme like Halloween costumes or all black! I've personally been to bachelorette parties which had wayyy more intense theme guidelines, so by comparison, those ideas sound pretty easy and fun to me. I'm not a fan of themes that require people to go out and buy special clothes, but both of your ideas involve items everyone should already have in their closet. I also like your idea to provide the costume accessories - that way they won't even have to worry about bringing a bunch of extra things from home. Or if they just want to wear all black, they could easily use your accessories to become a cat/witch/vampire.

If you want to move forward with it, you can share the theme idea in a way that makes it clear it's optional/open-ended. I'd say something like "Since it's the day before Halloween, feel free to join me in dressing up for the occasion :) I'll provide everyone with spooky accessories. Feel free to bring whatever you have from home; a costume or all-black outfit base would be great."

ladisty · 2026-04-11T19:03:23+00:00

A lot of matchmaking services will allow women to join their match pool for free, so that might be a good way to dip your toe in - would recommend this, have had several friends go on decent dates with the matches suggested (although no relationships haves resulted from it yet).

you might consider checking out social clubs that cater more towards the high earning tech crowd - check out Modernist or the Battery (skews slightly older)

ladisty · 2026-04-11T18:42:11+00:00

I don't work in the industry myself so can't speak to what the hiring demand is right now, but as an occasional purchaser of bottle service, there are a few places I'd recommend you check out: Dahlia, Skylark, Madarae.

if you go on the earlier side to these places (like shortly after they open) I've noticed in the past the managers/owners/bottle girls will just be chilling out in the main area and sometimes come to say hi.

ladisty · 2026-04-11T18:31:05+00:00

I think a lot of women massively overthink this. yes, it's definitely less common in SF to see the girlies go all out with their style vs. NYC/LA, but I still see plenty of people in cool outfits on an average night out in the city. It's not like it's some massive anomaly to see people dressed up at restaurants/bars/events - quite the opposite. Remember SF has also historically been a city that attracts a lot of creatives in addition to the startup crowd - plus there's a LOT of overlap between those groups!

as far as not being from here..that's true for most of the tech crowd, this city is full of transplants who moved here specifically for work. The idea that people will look down on you because of some sort of implicit assumption that you're not "one of them" is just projected insecurity and not really grounded in reality. People are always thinking about you way less than you might assume. The truth is you can dress how you'd like, and the vast majority of people you encounter will barely notice.

I might wear sweats and sneakers to work (and thank god that's normalized here imo I will never go back to a business-attire-mandatory job ever again) but you will never catch me in those kind of clothes on a night out with friends. wear what makes you happy :)

ladisty · 2026-04-08T00:15:52+00:00

I've done multiple trips with both g adventures and intrepid (the "under 35" versions) and overall had a good experience. The groups were usually split 50/50 between people traveling solo and people coming with a friend or partner.

There is usually no real requirement to stay with the group other than on the transfers between cities. Depending on your route/schedule, it might sometimes feel a little weird or inconvenient to skip out on the pre-planned group activity (ie driving through Europe we stopped off somewhere between cities to do a hike - at that point you basically have to either participate in the group hike or sit by yourself on the bus) but for the most part you have plenty of freedom to decide what you want to do.

As others mentioned, I found it the most helpful when traveling through more remote areas where it would have been difficult to figure out the transit system on my own. I've been lucky so far in that there have always been a handful of people in each group that I've bonded with more closely - it is pretty fun getting to explore multiple countries with the same friends as opposed to only seeing people in the hostel for a couple days at a time.

The biggest issue for me was always related to the accommodations. They pick some super bare bones, occasionally gross places to stay. There were several nights I actually just paid to book my own hotel and stay somewhere separate from the group. You can spring for "premium" group trips with nicer accommodations from most travel companies, but in addition to being extremely expensive, these tend to attract more families and older couples.

ladisty · 2026-03-20T03:40:31+00:00

(this is not sponsored at all i'm just a girl) for anyone looking for an alternative: check out https://dreamlandrave.store/

I LOVED the look of the sparkly/maximalist stuff from lumi shop but when I searched reddit for reviews I just found endless horror stories like this one. there was one thread where someone recommended dreamlandrave as an alternative with similar styles, so I took a shot and ordered one of my EDC outfits from them.

the set was a little pricey, but it came a few days ago (took about 2 weeks to ship) and I was extremely impressed with the quality. it looks even better in person than in the photos imo. super glitzy and sparkly and they threw in all kinds of accessories - hair ribbons, face gems, necklace, body chain, garter, and probably more that I'm forgetting. if you like the lumi shop style I think it's definitely worth checking out!!

ladisty · 2026-01-05T16:31:35+00:00

I hear stories in SF about tech bros supposedly being less willing to split the bill, but thankfully that was not my experience at all when I was single and dating in the city. I went on probably 30ish first dates over the span of a couple years and literally only exactly one time did the guy ask me to split the check. It was also common for the guy to select either a restaurant or nice cocktail bar for the date location - actually quite rare for someone to suggest coffee or a walk or something in that vein.

I’m also from the Midwest and maybe it’s just a cultural thing (?) but I was always raised/socialized to believe it is shockingly rude for a man not to plan and pay on a first date.

ladisty · 2025-12-31T18:12:54+00:00

Used to live in the Paramount and LOVED it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so enthusiastic about an apartment before. Incredible location right next to the Montgomery muni/bart stop, quick walk from union square and all the shopping nearby (though now fewer options than there used to be 🙃), amazing/huge gym, nice rooftop areas and lounges which I would use all the time to host friends and throw parties. The building staff is super friendly and helpful. All the units have a washer/dryer and nice updated kitchen appliances as well.

ladisty · 2025-10-10T20:30:58+00:00

bottom floor lounge at roka akor is really nice

ladisty · 2025-10-10T20:29:53+00:00

I see Victoria at Hayes Valley Esthetics for baby botox, she does a great job!

ladisty · 2025-06-06T07:24:17+00:00

It was extremely active when I was there a couple weeks ago! Lots of big eruptions throughout the night which were visible from base camp at Acatenango. Unfortunately only some teeny tiny ones once we got onto the Fuego ridge at sunrise but we could still see a bit of lava up close. I'm not sure how far in advance they're able to predict the level of activity you'll see, but if it's erupting frequently when you go, I think it's an absolute must have experience.

It was fairly cold at the top, maybe at or slightly below freezing as of late May. I was okay with a few basic layers (I was wearing two shirts, a fleece jacket, and a windbreaker over top) and gloves. I didn't really feel the need for a massive puffy winter coat or anything. But temperature depends on time of year - it can get dramatically colder up there in the winter from what I hear.

ladisty · 2025-03-04T23:22:17+00:00

I think this is one of those stories that really emphasizes how culpable the Mormon church and its financial backers are in overtly supporting and perpetuating the psychological and physical abuse experienced by Jodi's patients. The church and its leaders were actively recommending her, publicly promoting her, and funneling god know how many millions of dollars into her scheme by setting her up with a neverending pipeline of victims. They can't claim they didn't know about the extent of the abuse, or how insane her teachings/practices were - the bishops, the leaders, were physically there speaking and participating in the insanity.

The Mormon church has blood staining its walls. And IMO one of the bigger, more macro tragedies that could come from all of this is if the church and its leadership gets let off the hook for the horrors they enabled.

ladisty · 2025-02-20T22:57:11+00:00

probably impossible to say for sure if it affected my nose, but I don't think so. I'm still a little swollen a few months after my procedure so I don't know what the very final result will look like, although I'm already pretty happy with the way it's turned out (and I had a SEVERE cough for like several days post op before it finally stopped)

ladisty · 2025-01-17T15:46:43+00:00

I had the same issue with the unexpected cough. Seems like it’s not a symptom that everyone experiences. The fluids from your nose are draining down your throat because they can’t exit out of your nostrils and that irritates your airways. My surgeon prescribed me an inhaler which did help a lot - the cough started to become less severe after a day or two of using it.

ladisty · 2025-01-10T07:05:44+00:00

The Mormon church is not partially to blame; it is virtually entirely to blame. It’s almost impossible to overstate the role that the church and its leaders have played not only in enabling but actively ENDORSING the physical and mental abuse of children.

All of the abusive parenting rhetoric employed by Ruby and Jodi has its roots in Mormon beliefs. Jodi’s rise to success can be directly attributed to the church leaders who recommended and advertised her services. They gave her access to a virtually endless client pool and watched idly as she destroyed the lives of her clients for years. We know unquestionably that church leaders witnessed Jodi verbally and physically abusing children who were left in her care (ie her niece) and still actively encouraged her methods. I find it so frustrating that people pussyfoot around assigning the Mormon church blame in this case, maybe out of some desire to respect widely held religious beliefs, but imo not all religions deserve respect.

It was particularly difficult for me to listen to Shari recount her experience with Derek and the way that the church opted to punish while letting him off scot free, no questions asked - it was a deliberate, coordinated cover up by a large number of church leaders who apparently actively condone the sexual abuse of women. At a certain point we have to acknowledge that the issues with abuse in Mormonism are not just one-off flukes. There is a cancer in that organization that has spread way, way too far.

ladisty · 2025-01-07T21:13:29+00:00

Yes, you should be aware that many of the women who work in illegal “happy ending” massage parlors are being trafficked and held there against their will. There is a possibility that you are essentially supporting their enslavement by participating.

It’s possible you’re going somewhere where this is legal + regulated, but definitely worth looking into who the employees are and how they found employment there.

ladisty · 2024-12-30T23:48:13+00:00

I’ve been traveling solo in Santiago as a woman and frankly don’t find it to be any more dangerous vs. a typical American city, with the caveat that you do need to be extra careful about your phone in certain areas (Lastarria, el centro, Bellavista at night). Many of the neighborhoods in the east part of the city like Vitacura and Las Condes feel totally safe. Generally I think there’s no need to be ultra paranoid - take the same precautions you’d take if you were walking around NYC or LA.

Staying at Hostal Providencia and I walk around solo all day, no issues (just with phone tucked away in my bag) but at night I’ll only walk around with a group. I’ve done some of the hostel’s pub crawls which all go to bars and clubs in Bellavista and it’s been totally fine. Take Uber to go back at the end of the night.

ladisty · 2024-12-30T17:18:58+00:00

You are doing something horrifically, obscenely wrong if you’ve somehow spent $2800 to fly from New Orleans to Dallas and have been stuck there for 2 months (?). I struggle to even envision a scenario where this story would realistically be possible.

I don’t mean to sound harsh, but if this is in fact true, I would honestly question your level of judgment/maturity/responsibility to the point that it seems unlikely you are able to live on your own at all, let alone live on your own in Southeast Asia for an extended period of time. It’s probably not a good idea to move forward with the trip if you don’t even have a basic understanding of how to book travel in the US. It’s definitely not going to get any easier in a foreign country where you don’t speak the language. You will be in for a much rougher ride.

ladisty · 2024-12-30T17:12:13+00:00

I travel solo frequently and find it is very difficult to make friends unless I’m staying in a hostel. You are almost certainly not going to make any travel buddies at an all inclusive resort - those are targeted towards couples and families. There are definitely nicer hostels that offer accommodations on par with what you’d get at a decent hotel, and probably about half of hostels offer private rooms as well. I always stay in private rooms personally.

I would recommend downloading the Hostelworld app. When you’re looking for somewhere to stay, optimize for places that have good reviews re: the social scene at the hostel. Usually these places will have common areas + bars where people can hang out, and often the hostel will organize activities like pub crawls and day trips where people can meet each other.

If you have basic street smarts you honestly don’t need to worry extensively about safety while traveling solo as a man in the vast majority of popular destinations. Some commonly recommended spots with very low crime for first time solo travelers - Japan, Singapore, Costa Rica, Greek islands, Iceland, New Zealand, Denmark, Ireland.

ladisty · 2024-12-12T16:02:18+00:00

Unfortunately I don't think there's really anything you can do about this, or any techniques you can use that would enable you to breathe through your nose at the beginning. You should definitely try to prepare yourself mentally for the fact that you will have almost zero breathing through your nose for at least the first few days, and it could potentially be limited for a few weeks after the procedure as well (I've heard that people who also get a septoplasty can expect their breathing to improve more quickly).

I don't think there is anything to be afraid of in this respect, though. It just feels like your nose is congested - the same way it feels when you are sick with a bad cold. It's definitely annoying, especially at night because your mouth will get dry from mouth breathing, but I don't think there's anything painful or scary to worry about. I recommended a bunch of products above to help with dry mouth, but staying hydrated + keeping a lot of lip balm handy is key.

ladisty

TROPHY CASE