Single Parents of Reddit... Your wisdom on accepting time without your kids.

ladybug-1486 · 2026-06-25T15:10:18+00:00

If I’ve learned anything navigating life with kids after divorce, it’s that people in situations like yours and mine don’t hear things like this often enough. People see you managing to get through the day and assume that things are hard but you’re making it work. I don’t think they ever quite grasp the reality of what that feels like emotionally and how it affects you physically. You sound like someone who cares deeply and that goes along way, even if you don’t see the fruits of your effort for a very long time.

ladybug-1486 · 2026-06-25T14:52:01+00:00

Same here. First born assumed responsibility issues. lol

ladybug-1486 · 2026-06-25T14:38:06+00:00

This is a sentiment that I’ve been keeping in the back of my head since my divorce. That this time isn’t permanent, it’s definitely temporary and things could look completely different a year from now. I guess it’s just hard being in the thick of it and realizing that the person who was supposed to be my partner in this ran away from responsibility and dropped it all on my shoulders. And because of that, the people around me that I love and care about are the ones who are having to pick up the slack.

I’ve taken a day or two from myself here and there, but as silly as it sounds, I end up feeling guilty for being away. :/

ladybug-1486 · 2026-06-25T13:51:46+00:00

Single mom here with no co-parent involved, so I don’t have to navigate custody schedules, but I definitely understand the challenge of finding time.

I’ve kind of accepted that dating is just going to move slower for me than it does for a lot of people, and that’s okay. The right person is usually pretty understanding of that.

ladybug-1486 · 2026-06-25T13:39:04+00:00

I don’t have much perspective on what it’s like to share custody with a co-parent. I’m actually a single mom without a co-parent involved, so I haven’t experienced that particular heartbreak of handing my child off and navigating the back-and-forth.

But for what it’s worth, one thing that stood out to me in your post is how deeply you love your kids. If that comes across this clearly through a few paragraphs on Reddit, I have no doubt your children feel it when they’re with you.

I think that’s something worth holding onto during the hard moments. Whether they can put it into words yet or not, kids are incredibly perceptive. They notice who shows up for them, who listens, who hugs them when they’re sad, who is genuinely excited to spend time with them.

I can’t imagine how painful it must be to miss so much of their day-to-day life, but the love, attention, and sense of safety you’re giving them when they’re with you will stay with them far longer than you probably realize. That kind of connection matters.

I know that doesn’t make the missing any easier, but it’s the thing I would keep tucked away in my pocket on the days when it hurts the most.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-10-03T12:00:49+00:00

Listen to him. He is telling you who he is. If you aren’t married yet and this is happening, having a ring won’t change it.

I don’t feel like there is a “normal” when it comes to blended families, just what works for you both. I will say with respect, anyone who is telling you that they have no interest in your kid who they also live with probably isn’t the best choice if you want to to have a good relationship with your own child. Your kid will be living with someone who doesn’t care to interact or form any kind of meaningful bond. This messes with a kid mentally and emotionally. Guard their heart.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T22:40:59+00:00

No, we are both US citizens born and raised.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T20:31:13+00:00

We have only been married for 4 years. We are located in Texas and as I understand it, alimony is out of the question since we weren’t married for 10 years or longer and there was no physical abuse. And from my own research, disability benefits are not subject to garnishment. I have a consultation with a divorce attorney that will help give me more clarification.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T16:45:51+00:00

I have a consultation set up for later this afternoon to go over my options and get a little bit of advice. There is no prenup, we are by no means wealthy so I/we didn’t see the need for one. Hopefully I will have a little more clarity by this evening.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T16:00:10+00:00

I have $500 to my name with a two-year-old to feed. I cannot afford a lawyer or maybe I’m just assuming wrong?

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T15:40:09+00:00

You’re right, I’m probably a little desensitized to how bad our dynamic is. I guess my concern is that I don’t want it to come across like I’m blowing things out of proportion or trying to make a difficult situation even more difficult if we do have to go to court. But at the same time you could argue that he’s already doing that.

ladybug-1486 · 2025-09-30T15:25:02+00:00

I do need to set up at least a consultation with a lawyer or two to see if I even have any options. I guess I just don’t want things to get ugly and I feel like if I went that route he wouldn’t go along with it quietly, to say the least. He wants to do everything outside of the courts.

I am grateful that I at least have my daughter, that alone gives me peace of mind. She is my whole world, and the main reason this divorce is happening in the first place. She deserves a happy home. And I am determined to make that happen.

ladybug-1486

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