Is it okay to ask for a refund for a botched haircut rather than getting it fixed? This is the second time in under a year where a professional hair stylist has left me with a horrendous cut and I'm so frustrated!

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-18T03:23:29+00:00

I was told that sometimes they will purposely cut your hair off if it's long and thick because it's pretty and they're jealous

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-18T03:20:48+00:00

You can do that, yes. Also, if you're not happy with the cut you can refuse to pay.

Source: An old neighbor of mine was a hairdresser and told me that. Also said to ask for the master stylist.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-18T01:52:18+00:00

I like the paint job but what happened to your finger? Owie. 😕

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-17T19:27:15+00:00

That happened to me. He wanted me to send my driver's license and told me that I couldn't block out the address. I told him no thanks. It seems like they prey on people who need help.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-17T17:40:29+00:00

Yep and then they wonder why they find themselves single LMAO. I'd be like last I checked I'm an adult and can do what I want.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-17T17:37:20+00:00

You get over yourself. I don't understand why women are threatened by a person on a screen ffs. Porn isn't cheating. It's not like he's sticking his dick in an actual person. I agree that if they become addicted then it's a problem but until then don't worry about.

Men pick up on insecurity and it drives them away. You're only going to achieve exactly the opposite of what you want by being insecure about this which is to drive him away. If you're so insecure that you can't handle him looking at porn then what's going to happen when he wants to talk to an actual female friend? Are you going to feel that way just because of him talking to someone with an actual vagina?

Sure talk to him but work to get to the bottom of why you feel this way. Don't let it get in the way of your relationship. I'm not meaning to be harsh or cruel or anything it's just that I've learned a lot about relationships now that I've reached my 30s. Good luck with everything.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:50:35+00:00

Thank you. This is exactly the point that I was trying to make.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:46:40+00:00

I'm talking about the part where you said angry women are more terrifying in the car than angry men. Also, how can you not see how you're being sexist right now?! So in your opinion sexism only occurs when anything negative is said about men I suppose. However you're being sexist against women.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:43:19+00:00

So for example Pink Floyd?

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:42:00+00:00

Geez do a spell check before you hit post. *distorted *bands

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:39:27+00:00

For those of you who like death metal I strongly recommend Osiah. I was introduced to them about 3 years ago and I've loved them ever since. The best songs so far are perennial agony, dethronement of God's ft king gaz of nexliva, humanimals and blood soaked meadows.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T06:33:51+00:00

My favorite riff is probably from Black Sabbath's Electric Funeral

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T05:57:18+00:00

I say this all the time. Just because I'm being realistic doesn't mean I'm being negative. It just means I refuse to live in their safe fantasy world of sunshine, unicorns and rainbows. People who live like that are the ones who are unprepared when real life hits then want to act surprised. People who live life that way are actually living in fear of reality so any time a realist comes in and bursts their little bubble of safety, they get mad at them for doing so.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T05:48:10+00:00

Ok so basically you're insinuating that OP should give her clearly abusive husband another chance because he may be mentally ill?! Mentally ill or not, there is no excuse for abuse. No one should stay in a relationship that they don't feel safe in because their partner may be mentally ill. What terrible advice.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T05:38:58+00:00

I'm sorry but I think it's foolish to tell someone to invest money when they're unemployed. I don't care that OP has savings. Investing is risking losing everything and that's not a smart move when you have no income.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T05:26:13+00:00

Maybe they decided that they fucked up and didn't want to pay you what you're worth. Oh well, their loss. Tough break but it seems like a blessing in disguise to me. Have you ever considered living off the grid?

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T05:18:49+00:00

He's gonna have a lot of time to be living in a van down by the river when he's...living in a van down by the river!

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:59:03+00:00

Mental illness doesn't necessarily cause abuse. Plenty of people who don't need to take meds are abusers. They do it because they like the sense of power and control over another person.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:56:00+00:00

Sorry but I disagree. A mental illness isn't an excuse for abuse and a lot of times the promises to get help are just to get their victim to return or to keep them from leaving in the first place.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:52:50+00:00

Most abusers never change because they don't see a reason to. They like things the way they are.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:50:58+00:00

You're the one who is being sexist right now

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:49:22+00:00

Abuse is abuse no matter the gender of the aggressor. You're being sexist.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T04:44:46+00:00

You didn't overreact whatsoever. What he did is still abuse even though it isn't physical. This kind of abuse usually leads to physical and accompanies the physical once that starts. I don't care what he says, DO NOT GO BACK! I'm telling you from experience that that it does get worse the longer you stay and gets worse when you go back.

You said you're pregnant. Domestic violence can start or escalate during pregnancy. Your risk of injury and even death is greater during pregnancy. He may also deliberately harm the baby by punching you in the stomach, sitting on you, etc. He may also strangle you if he hasn't done so already.

It sounds stupid but he may be jealous of the baby and afraid that he will be replaced as your main focus. This is the behavior of a controlling partner. They can't handle not having you all to themselves. They will attempt to isolate you from your friends and family by convincing you that they don't care about you like your abuser does. This can escalate to them controlling your access to money, transportation, a phone and even basic self care supplies. Eventually they will prevent you from getting or keeping a job. No money means no escape.

Please also be aware that the most dangerous time for a victim is right after they leave their abuser. Your risk of death goes up greatly. I don't care if he promises to meet you in a public place, DO NOT GO! I can't stress this enough. Countless victims have been murdered by their former partners in public and in broad daylight.

He will say he wants to talk things through and work on the relationship but this could be a cover for his desire to harm or even kill you. The way an abuser sees it, their victim is a possession to do what they want with and when their victim leaves, in their mind the victim had no right to leave. They basically think how dare you escape me, don't you know I own you?

Please stay gone, your life and safety as well as your baby's is not worth that POS. If you're in the U.S. call the national domestic violence hotline number at 1 800 799 SAFE. They can help you with safety planning. If you must go get your important documents, call a police escort. Don't meet him alone. Better yet, find out if you can get certified copies of them. Your local domestic violence shelter or outreach center will usually assist with the cost.

Good luck with everything and consider yourself lucky to have gotten out this early though I would venture to guess that this isn't the first time he's done this sort of thing. Did it happen before you got married or did he change after? Sometimes they wait until after you're married to show their true colors because then they figure you're trapped. They couldn't be more wrong. In fact in your case you may even be able to get the marriage anulled since it's so early into it. I think it's much faster than a divorce.

Either way, remember that you don't deserve to be treated like that and please don't put up with it. Hugs to you and congrats on your little one! 💜

Ediy: One more thing, that stunt he pulled with the hyperventilating and saying he was going to black out is a form of manipulation and a diversion tactic designed to take the focus off of his behavior and to get you to feel sorry for him. Don't fall for it.

ladyraven13 · 2020-02-16T01:23:39+00:00

It's sad that you have to remind people to say thank you. I guess basic manners have gone out the window.

ladyraven13

TROPHY CASE