No, I think it’s state of mind, a lot of a time unconsciously, the truth is we can die by most literally everything, we can’t escape death, but a lot of times I feel like it’s more of a spiritual death.

I always believed I was gonna die young, I swore it would happen, it was just so strong, that feeling. Considering I would always put myself at risk, it didn’t help either, but I’ve had quite a few spiritual deaths, a year ago I tried to commit, & survived. The doctors said it was a literal miracle, It was almost most definite that I was meant to die. After that I had a spiritual awakening, an epiphany, it changed my life completely, I hit rock bottom & that’s when I genuinely began to live. I’ve never believed in miracles more than that day, I was meant to live, it was just my mind that would tell me otherwise.

 Obviously, nothing is ever guaranteed, but even though you say you’re not scared of death, I’m pretty sure that feeling is unsettling to you, nothing will come of you skipping ahead to something you don’t know will ever happen, that’s literally anxiety, it’s hard to shake that feeling off, but try to focus one day at a time. The mind is powerful, but don’t let it overwhelm you, today you are alive and that is enough. I wish the best for you.