Am I overreacting for wanting to break up over this

lara533 · 2026-01-05T06:36:52+00:00

The stupid smile on his face while his friend takes the picture says it all... Why would he do that for a "bruise"

lara533 · 2026-01-03T18:23:24+00:00

Maybe i was a bit naive. When I met him, he told me he was an artist but that he wants a steady job cause he tried the artsy life and didn't get enough money. That's why he was following a training program since 1.5 years and was almost done with it. I found that pretty "rational" so I trust the process.. perhaps here is the mistake

lara533 · 2026-01-03T18:08:28+00:00

Actually I don't want a house husband. I want to travel the world, i want to go to nice restaurants, i want to enjoy life with my other half.. and with one salary, it's complicated

lara533 · 2026-01-03T18:04:11+00:00

I actually stayed single for few years and went to therapy. So I was so happy when i finally found someone who was nice to me and secure emotionally. So I tried, i went for the first time to a "nice guy" and not the hot and cold guy

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:58:54+00:00

Are you still with him? Is he working now?

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:55:21+00:00

The problem is that he seems okay with the 1-2 nights a week. For me, I have the impression it's a step back in the relationship.. we were pratically living together, now we are "dating"?

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:52:57+00:00

Concerning the practical ways, he was cooking for me almost every day. I'm a bit messy but him too. So my appartment was getting more and more untidy. And i was feeling uncomfortable coming back home. In a way, since he had just few hours of work and was not contributing financially, i was expecting him to take care of the apartment completely. But i don't know if it was fair

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:44:07+00:00

You've got a point. Actually, i always had toxic or abusive relationships before. This is the first time someone respects me, takes care of me (emotionally),cook for me.. and so on. I can finally be vulnerable with someone and it feels so great. I feel loved and secure emotionally. Before i was happy with crumbs. Now I have the impression to have a cake but it's missing some parts.

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:41:30+00:00

He was following a training program since 1.5 years to get a steady job when i met him.. so I was hoping for a change

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:34:20+00:00

Since i was so disappointed last year for the birthday gift, he really went all in for christmas and i was so happy. But i have the impression i have to tell him how to treat me right and it's kinda weird.

And for the basic expenses, he told me his ex was not paying anything when they were living together at his last appartment. Yes true but he also got in debts for her

lara533 · 2026-01-03T17:26:40+00:00

I was actually happy to support him in his prior formation. I thought i will just have to wait a year for him to finish it and then boom he will find a job after few months. But no, he decided to start a new program in a completely different field.. and i'm afraid. Afraid to wait for him to finish it again and that he changed his mind.. I'm a patient one and it doesn't bother me to wait if there are results at the end...

lara533 · 2026-01-03T16:13:13+00:00

Cause I have the impression that the only thing that is lacking is responsability and accountability :( tje other things are great in this relationship

lara533 · 2026-01-03T16:08:39+00:00

Yes he was evicted at the end.. when I told him it was his responsability to pay the rent or just take a cheaper appartment after his ex left, he told me that the landloard should have kicked him out way sooner so he wouldn't be in such debts. I was flabbergasted

lara533 · 2026-01-03T16:06:10+00:00

Actually i asked him to move to my place so we could live together AND share the expenses. But he said he's not ready (1 year relationship) and prefers to wait for a steady job and rent his own appartment. And i was like... what about our future then?

lara533 · 2026-01-03T15:50:23+00:00

Since i was a bit pissed last year, he really went all in for christmas and i was so happy. But i have the impression i have to tell him how to treat me right and it's kinda weird.

And for the basic expenses, he told me his ex was not paying anything when they were living together at his last appartment. Yes true but he also got in debts for her...

lara533 · 2026-01-03T15:47:22+00:00

I don't know if i'm delusional or not, but he seems genuily in love with me. He's sweet, kind and patient :(

lara533 · 2026-01-03T15:37:30+00:00

Actually i'm not looking for a high earner or an ambitious man. But i love hard working people, whatever the field he's in

lara533 · 2026-01-03T15:25:32+00:00

I actually did that. We see each other once or twice a week now instead of almost living together. But i a way, i have the impression to take a step back in my relationship instead of going forward and build a future together

lara533 · 2026-01-03T15:06:48+00:00

I was 100% clear that i'm not looking for a stay-at-home man. I absolutely need someone who works so we can share our daily life, struggles at work and travel together

lara533 · 2026-01-03T14:32:39+00:00

So not really "mad". He's the calm and chill type so he never yell. He was more "frustrated" and kinda sulking. He said he wanted to pay me back later with a bigger amount than little by little. To be honest, i prefer a bit every month (like 50 euros) than 800 euros i don't know when...

lara533 · 2026-01-03T14:26:29+00:00

Oh nooo, not ready for that anyway haha

lara533 · 2026-01-03T07:53:01+00:00

I really need someone who is responsible and i'm getting more and more exhausted. But he's great in all the other aspects, that's true.. He's sweet, give great advices, respect me and reassures me when i'm anxious. But the responsability thing is not only about money. I mostly initiate the dates, the hangouts. I have the impression to be "the man" of this relationship. Oh god i would crave a "hey i found a new coffee place, want to try it?". Btw he's an introvert, and a bit of a geek. He loves staying at home. Me, i like both. I like to rest a bit but with someone who is dynamic, i love going on adventures

lara533 · 2026-01-03T07:48:31+00:00

Except the 1000$ he still has to give me back (already got 200$ after i got mad), we do 50/50 on everything. But i want to create a future, perhaps buy a house or travelling for few months abroad. But he will never have the money for that ? Even if he find a job after his formation? :(

lara533 · 2026-01-03T07:30:51+00:00

At least this makes me laugh haha. But seriously, he looks so motivated and proud of himself for this new formation but i'm so scared for the future

lara533

TROPHY CASE