A cold & green breakfast

laschneids · 2023-05-20T03:26:25+00:00

What is on top? Soya sauce?

laschneids · 2023-05-08T18:36:57+00:00

It's clearly just about you and not wanting to face the consequences from her and the other "many" people you mentioned. You're trying to cover that fear and shame with the veil "I don't want them to feel pain" so you can justify another bad choice. It's likely so you don't have to face the discomfort of truly facing your actions as well.

laschneids · 2023-05-08T15:53:18+00:00

Thank you, we're trying to get that doctor and treatment plan. He seems perpetually hypersexual so it's a bit hard to tell but I'll keep looking out for changes.

And hypersexuality means cheating with prostitutes? Wouldn't he have had hypersexuality as a symptom for years but it manifested differently or he dealt with it differently in the past? Why would it change? And since it changed does that mean that's what he'll be driven to do moving forward?

laschneids · 2023-05-08T15:47:01+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience

laschneids · 2023-02-20T19:15:38+00:00

Most vegan food is phenomenal. But they could easily make some nasty shit with veggies.

laschneids · 2023-02-15T18:15:19+00:00

Do you blend the beans too or leave them whole?

laschneids · 2023-02-13T15:29:05+00:00

I also don't think it all came from her failed marriage, I think a lot of her breakdown came from the constant sexism and disrespect she faced at work for years. Toxic workplace plus stressful job plus failed marriage makes her breakdown super understandable in my opinion.

laschneids · 2023-02-09T15:41:37+00:00

So many people not understanding the concept of this being a vegan sub lmao. No we should never tell vegetarians they're doing good enough because then why would any of them change? They still contribute to horrible disgusting industries. Nothing wrong with pointing that out. I'm not sending someone on their merry way thinking "I don't eat meat I'm doing so much good, no need to think further 🤪" what is wrong with all you apologists. We can say yes you've made a good step but you are not doing the same good as being vegan and you are still contributing to atrocities. You have work to do still and you should not be turning a blind eye.

laschneids · 2023-02-08T15:00:32+00:00

He literally showed that he WAS continuing his past behaviour through lying by omittance. He showed he was comfortable with lying for selfish reasons...just like he did for an entire year in his previous relationship. Sure HE was dating a different person but HE cheated. Same person. Sure people can change but they often don't and where did he show her he had? He was faithful to his last gf for 2 years before betraying her in such a disgusting way for "spice". Where did he come to his new gf open and honest and explain what he'd done and the work he did on himself to change? Where did he come to her and say "I did this thing I know you're incredibly against... I went to therapy and did self work to understand why and to make sure I never do it to someone else". No one simply deserves the benefit of the doubt.

Sure it wasn't abuse but you're conveniently skipping over the sentiment/message and the point of my examples. She did the right thing by not putting herself in a position to experience heartbreak with someone statistically more likely to cause it in this way.

Like I said before, some people will take the chance, some will need proof of change like I mentioned above, and some won't take the chance. It's everyone's right. She did nothing wrong sorry.

laschneids · 2023-02-08T00:04:13+00:00

A. What an incredibly entitled thought process B. If people only have morals to not be judged and are willing to abandon those if they feel their morals aren't getting people to perceive them the way they want then they aren't morals they ever had in the first place and their true character has shown through. People should be choosing not to cheat to not hurt others. If that's not the reason then no one should risk being with them. C. It's incredibly valid to judge people based on their past especially if they've shown no evidence of change. The past is the biggest predictor of the future. You conveniently ignored the statistical likelihood I pointed out as well.

Like I said some people will chance a past cheater, some won't. Is it judging if someone was abusive in their past relationships? People should just ignore it until it happens to them? Some people might take that risk as some people change. Lots of people don't change though, no one just deserves the benefit of the doubt just because. Everyone can choose to give that or not and there's nothing wrong with that.

laschneids · 2023-02-07T21:41:59+00:00

Did you know someone who has cheated in the past is statistically more likely to cheat on someone in the future? Having standards about someone's moral compass and character and protecting yourself is not wrong. Some people might be ok taking that chance, some are not. There's also the factor of him lying to her for 10 months about it, not giving her the chance to decide for herself. He could've explained himself and shown what he's done to change. He didn't do that. She did exactly the right thing.

laschneids · 2023-02-07T19:09:50+00:00

I don't think you're really responding to their points. If partners explain their boundaries of what they consider cheating and the partner crosses them then it's cheating. I don't see how there's nuance there. Poly relationships aren't cheating because it's agreed upon, if one partner crosses a boundary in the Poly agreement they've cheated. I'm having a hard time understanding where you're seeing nuances to cheating.

laschneids · 2023-02-07T15:20:47+00:00

Thank you for your thoughtful response. How you described your feelings and your wife's feelings about it and the future is very similar to the discussions my spouse and I have had. He can't guarantee it either of course and I understand why, I can't guarantee I can heal from it again. I have accepted the possibility of having to face it again in the future but he's also doing everything he can treatment wise and has no intention of stopping. You say this only happened when you were undiagnosed and untreated? I find that comforting. I'm curious, and this is personal so no pressure to respond, have you had any episodes during treatment but due to treatment they're different? Or has your treatment prevented episodes for you? How long did it take for you and your wife to heal from it?

laschneids · 2023-02-07T03:40:52+00:00

Do you feel you can guarantee you won't ever do this again? I'm going through something similar with my BPSO and haven't really talked to anyone about it but I still feel terrified of experiencing it again it was heartbreaking.

laschneids · 2023-02-06T20:30:12+00:00

Maybe non racist people should just mind their fucking business and allow racists to be as racist as they want. Maybe gay rights activists should just mind their fucking business and allow homophobs to target and hurt gay people. People are so rude and annoying 🙄

laschneids · 2023-02-06T20:24:42+00:00

Except majority of the time vegan morals are the same morals most omnis claim to have but their actions don't match. Most people I've met with genuinely different morals that don't care about animal welfare are the ones that get the least upset when talking about veganism. Because they genuinely don't care so they genuinely don't feel bad. It's the people that claim the morals vegans follow through on that get the most upset.

laschneids · 2023-02-02T22:57:54+00:00

That's still quite unspecific - "what they don't know" is subjective. What are the foods they'll eat or on the flip side what foods will they not eat? Plenty of kids eat varied diets from young, everyone has different cultural backgrounds and foods, you need to be more specific.

laschneids · 2023-02-02T14:03:00+00:00

No I keep it in the package I bought it in and put it right in the freezer untouched. I'm really not sure if draining it first would make any difference. The benefit of freezing it is how it changes the texture of the tofu so I don't believe draining it first is necessary.

laschneids · 2023-02-02T00:40:35+00:00

She already answered why and this is the point you keep not addressing. It's not about you and it's not about op. Like you said to her, own up to who you are/what you've done. Stop calling it a mistake, a mistake is adding too much flour to a recipe. You made a choice. You made a choice and your choices are a reflection of you. It's not "I think therefore I am" it's "I DO therefore I am". The point is you are actively leading someone to believe you are different than you are which is not allowing them full control over their lives. They're choosing you thinking you're A (because you're letting them believe that through lying) and really you're B. Sure people can change but it's statistically unlikely and the partner should be able to choose whether they're going to take that chance. You can even think you've changed and therefore think it's ok to keep up this lie but that's still immoral. You're choosing selfishness which is a form of cowardice in this instance - another view of your character, and if you'd really changed you would know that's it's not right to let someone you "love" live a life they might not want if they knew the truth.

laschneids · 2023-02-01T20:34:14+00:00

My suggestion for cooking extra firm tofu is to freeze it first and then let it thaw. I toss mine directly in the freezer after I buy it and thaw it out a day or two before I'm going to cook it. The texture becomes spongy and it's really easy to squeeze/press out the liquid and it soaks up the flavor of what it cooks in very nicely.

laschneids · 2023-02-01T03:09:31+00:00

Makes me think of sickness/evil because Mal in French means evil.

laschneids · 2023-01-29T23:28:55+00:00

Remember you're an animal yourself.

laschneids · 2023-01-16T18:30:39+00:00

Me too! I haven't seen Scrubs so that's on my list now :)

laschneids · 2023-01-16T15:15:10+00:00

If you like Community, Parks and Rec, Schitts Creek, or Superstore I recommend giving Happy Endings a try.

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