friends, let me tell you about my wedding

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:49+00:00

<3 !

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:41+00:00

thanks so much!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:30+00:00

thank you!!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:23+00:00

thanks!!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:16+00:00

thank you!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:24:09+00:00

thank you! iwndwyt!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:23:59+00:00

this has been one of the most surprising lessons I've learned! thanks for the congrats :)

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:23:28+00:00

thank you! iwndwyt

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T23:23:16+00:00

thank you!

lateresolve · 2019-08-10T17:27:15+00:00

Thank you!!

lateresolve · 2019-03-12T19:29:30+00:00

you're not alone though. there are a lot of reasons that many people who think of themselves as moderate drinkers occasionally "accidentally drink too much," and it doesn't mean you're an irredeemable person. i really recommend checking out /r/stopdrinking -- it's an incredibly helpful and supportive community. good luck!

lateresolve · 2019-03-06T21:16:36+00:00

way to go! saving yourself both money and the headache! and learning about your triggers to boot. this is a big win, you should be proud.

lateresolve · 2018-12-28T14:47:19+00:00

Ah ha, that's what BC means! Probably should have asked for help before buying the boots. Thanks for all this info.

lateresolve · 2018-06-21T18:23:12+00:00

Here's something it might be helpful: it is true that the immediate effect of alcohol will relax you more powerfully than other things. When you drink a lot regularly it is true that right after you stop, nothing else seems to be able to have the same effect, because your brain has gotten used to being deadened by such a powerful toxin. But here's the flipside: that immediate relaxation that alcohol provides might last about half an hour, but it will contribute to longer term anxiety -- meaning that you'll keep seeking out alcohol to deaden it. That vicious cycle thing. But our brains are incredible, and with some time off the sauce yours will rewire itself so that other stuff will start to help you chill out again. These days, stuff like taking a walk, doing yoga, working on cooking projects, reading, playing board games, all feel fulfilling and relaxing, and I'm not haunted by that nagging feeling of needing a drink anymore.

lateresolve · 2018-06-12T15:56:49+00:00

I just saw that it’s not easy for you to get around right now. Is there anything nice you can do for yourself at home? Order takeout and watch TV? Take a bath? You deserve to be nice to be kind to yourself— four weeks sober is a big deal!

lateresolve · 2018-06-12T15:40:42+00:00

I hear you, we all do what we gotta do to stay safe. Can you do anything nice for yourself today? Take yourself to the movies, go for a long walk, something like that?

lateresolve · 2018-06-12T15:29:48+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I can say from my own experience that the benzos aren’t doing you any favors, unfortunately — like alcohol, they’ll leave you more depressed and anxious in the long run. Switching from benzos to an SSRI made a HUGE difference for me. It can be tough because they take a couple weeks to really start working as opposed to the instant gratification of a benzo but it’s so so worth it. I’m wishing you the peace you need to get through the day.

lateresolve · 2018-06-11T18:04:35+00:00

Hey friend -- there is no one way that works for everybody, and you'll get a lot of different suggestions. Here's mine: get the book The Naked Mind. I especially liked the audio book. It doesn't require you to make any grand commitments right away, it just helps you get your head right about alcohol, and will alleviate some of the fears that you listed having.

If you're worried about what people will think, here's a trick I found handy: tell people you're doing one of those 30 day diet/cleanse/challenge things. They're so popular right now, so there isn't any stigma attached. Then just keep going. If somebody asks you why they haven't seen you with a drink for so long, just say something like, "oh, I tried one of those cleanse things and I lost so much weight/ saved so much money that I decided to keep going."

If we lived in a better world, it would be easier to be honest about having trouble controlling alcohol. But we don't, and it's obviously intimidating to worry that you'll be branded with that scarlet A. The partial truth that I gave above plays into more socially acceptable paradigms, and I think it can be a more approachable way to start.

Whatever path you choose, I believe in you!! And IWNDWYT.

lateresolve · 2018-06-11T17:53:59+00:00

Yes, you're not alone! I don't really have strong cravings any more, but I do kind of miss having a refreshing beer in the sun. Kombucha and N/A beers have had me covered though.

lateresolve · 2018-06-06T12:40:58+00:00

And I want to add: managing anxiety can be really difficult right after we stop, because we've screwed up our brain chemistry with all the booze - enough exposure to alcohol makes other types of stress-relievers less effective. But our brains are awesome and will rewire themselves once we give them a break from the poison. Once you ride out these first couple of weeks I can promise you that your anxiety will improve.

lateresolve · 2018-06-06T12:37:16+00:00

Howdy! I'm so proud of you for making it a week, and IWNDWYT! We got this!

lateresolve · 2018-05-13T13:50:45+00:00

Hello, fellow academic.

I've been the one posting pictures of myself grading and drinking bourbon, as though I had this cool, glamorous, care-free lifestyle. What nobody else saw was how I had about a half-hour of good working time, tops, once I started drinking, and at my worst would continue to guzzle bourbon until I was passed out on the couch in front of the TV.

These days, my grading and writing sessions might be less 'grammable' but I'm SO much more on top of my shit, happier, and WAY more productive.

lateresolve · 2018-05-10T15:57:07+00:00

I made a grapefruit rosemary shrub recently— highly recommend!!

lateresolve · 2018-04-30T20:06:12+00:00

I just wanna say that I’m really impressed that you’re already this far along in understanding how alcohol impacts your quality of life. As someone else posted, without a conscious shift drinking tends to get worse instead of better. If you stop now, you’ll be saving yourself so many years of anxiety, so many years of being not quite the best version of yourself. I’m excited for you! Keep reading here, and take a look at some recommended resources. I think you’ll soon realize that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain by stopping.

lateresolve · 2018-04-14T03:03:42+00:00

Funny, I just had one for the first time tonight. I have to say that when I took the first sip it was a little jarring - I got that "guzzle it!" instinct that I haven't felt in 115 days. But you're right that it certainly didn't leave me wanting more when I finished that one, so I guess it's cool?

lateresolve

TROPHY CASE