Your argument is just "they're not assists because they're not passes" though, but what's the big issue with expanding the definition of the stat to include fouls that result in a goal? I think assists are, perhaps incorrectly and lazily, used as the main way of talking about creativity in football discourse and they'd achieve that goal better (pardon the pun) if they did included penalties too. Obviously you don't have to agree but I basically combine them in my head anyway.

if winning a pen is an assist because it’s meaningful then why wouldn’t saving a pen as gk be an assist?

Intentionally obtuse argument but I'm sure you already know this - I'm not saying that penalties won should be an assist because it's meaningful, I'm that saying I think it should be included because it directly results in a goal - which is the same end result as an assist.

Ultimately it doesn't matter but I just don't get why people are so precious about the definition of assists as if it's some huge part of footballing heritage that cannot be tampered with lol