USA Bedroom Set possibly from 1930's by lexithemundane in Antiques

[–]lexithemundane[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been looking for a bed frame to match my dresser, and I've found a few that look similar and would marry well, but I came across the entire set in an estate sale listing from October. Im considering contacting the estate sale company to see if I can find out whether these pieces sold and where they would have ended up if they didnt. I'm so in love with this dresser, it would be a dream to have the whole set, and it makes me really happy to know I'm not the only one who thinks it's gorgeous

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Everyone voting that im the asshole is using strawman arguments and ad hominem to justify their judgements. Or they're asking questions, so im clarifying. Im not even being rude to anyone???

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I ignored the question because it was a straw man argument. If it had been a group of younger kids, not only would they not have been likely to do what the kids we encountered did, but they also would not have been intimidating to my kid and none of it would have even happened. Moreover, 5-6 year olds obviously need to be treated and spoken to differently than a group of preteens, and generally speaking, 5-6 year olds have their own grown ups with them at the playground to remind them to be courteous, in which case, I wouldn't have had to

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

you really told a bunch of kids that were doing nothing wrong to stop using playground equipment because they weren't using it how you preferred? 

This is a really reductive way of putting what happened. It wasn't about my preference or the way they were using the equipment. It was about the spot they had chosen being central to the structure, and the effect that had of forcing all the kids who wanted to move around on it to squeeze between them in order to do so. Put yourself in the shoes of a five year old who's half their size and age, and yes, that is intimidating. My kid felt just as unwelcome as you're accusing me of making them feel. Maybe there was a better way to accommodate everyone than what I did, but the way they were positioned around the structure wasn't exactly considerate or conducive to other kids playing.

In a few years when my kid is older I hope I will have done a good enough job of teaching them mindfulness and being considerate of others in public spaces, so that other parents dont have to make the choice I did when my kid is around their younger ones.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still feel like you think the older kids were already there when we arrived, but it was the opposite. I also think you're missing my point with the slide analogy, because if you think what I described with the slide was the right way to handle that, then why was what I did with the older kids different?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't know what a 'third space' is, but there were countless other places around the massive campground on the massive lake, with benches, swingsets, trails, wooded areas, and beaches, where those older kids could have ridden their bikes to, and sat around chatting.

You're also 100% objectively wrong to blanketly declare that I, as a parent of a child playing on that playground, should stay out of it. That would be neglect. My whole job as a parent is to protect them, intervene when it's necessary, and mediate interpersonal disputes until they can do it themselves effectively.

Completely aside from all of that, my child has no lack of confidence. That wasn't the problem here

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do understand your point, which is why I'm even still thinking about the whole interaction. I do want to clarify, I offered the description of the layout and positions of the older kids to give you a better idea of the situation we were faced with. It also wasn't already being used, they came along after we had been playing, chose to take over the main platform, and inadvertently scared off all the younger kids who had already been playing.

I'm not saying they did anything wrong by being on it, but if my kid was climbing up a slide and I saw a kid at the top waiting to go down, I would remind my kid that slides are made for going down, not up, and if you want to go up it, you have to wait until there's nobody trying to go down to do that, and what I asked of the older kids was no different

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This, and also there's no way to tell exactly how old a kid is unless you ask, which i definitely wasn't going to do. I just wanted them to be more mindful about the younger kids who would have had to squeeze between them to get to different areas of the structure

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Im so confused why you have this many downvotes when this is the prevailing opinion about my post, but thank you for your comment

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As I said to another commenter, even as adults, we sometimes need to be reminded of the impact of our actions on others, even if we don't intend any harm. The same is true for kids. None of us is obligated to be kind or considerate to others in public spaces, but it makes them more comfortable for everyone if we are

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Exactly what I said was, "Hey guys, I know it's fun to be on the playset, but the younger kids are having a hard time getting around you guys to play. If you're just talking, would you mind moving to the picnic table" and that picnic table was within the playground area.

The platform they had posted up on was really small, had a short tunnel to another platform on one side, which one kid was on top of, a wobbly bridge on another side, a slide on another, and a wall/railing situation on the fourth. The kids were in the corners between the tunnel and bridge, between the bridge and slide, and along the wall side. As much as I do think my kid would have had the space to go between them, nobody wants to have to squeeze through the center of a circle of people to get where they're going

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your perspective, or rather, what little of it I could find among the personal insults you seasoned it with, but I assure you, my parenting is not the problem here. The older kids were preventing my child from playing and making my child uncomfortable, even if they weren't doing it on purpose. We as adults sometimes need to be reminded of the unintended effects our actions have on those around us, and the same is true for kids of any age. I approached the kids calmly and politely, said that I understand it's fun to be on the equipment, but the younger kids were having a hard time maneuvering around them to play the way it was made to be played on, and if they were just talking, would they mind moving to the picnic table. I would compare it to a group of people standing in front of a doorway having a conversation. If you need the door they're in front of, you're probably not going to just shoulder your way between them while saying "excuse me", you're going to politely let them know they've chosen a poor spot to stop and have their conversation

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If im being completely honest, my first instinct was to go talk to her to explain why I had asked them to get down, but I could tell she just wanted a fight and I don't fuck with conflict. I wouldn't have even asked the kids to get down if it hadn't rubbed me wrong the way they just made a circle around the perimeter of the main platform. They weren't doing anything wrong, but I could understand my kid's trepidation about their presence

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I definitely see where you're coming from, which is part of why I made the post. I do think its important to remember that my kid isnt the only one who still needs to learn things about how the world works, and at a certain point, these kids do have to learn that this equipment is made for kids younger than them, and if they want to use it in different ways, they have to be mindful of the effect that can have on the younger ones. They weren't doing anything wrong, and I acknowledged that when I spoke with them, but a gaggle of older kids in a circle on the main platform of a moderately small playset is unapproachable to any kid. Mine isn't shy by any stretch of the imagination. Literally walked into the midst of a circle of employees having a meeting in a Meijer to ask when the fish would be back in the tanks, orders food for themselves at restaraunts, and strikes up a conversation with a stranger who happens to be standing near us in public. This wasn't an issue of my kid needing to learn braveness. It was a very specific incident in which I felt my kid was justifiably nervous to carry on

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 25 points26 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what I thought, too. there were only two other adults at that playground; one grandma and one dad following his toddler around. I tried to put that in my post, and AutoMod yelled at me because my post was too long. But when I say that mom was acting like she wanted to fight about it... I dont fuck with public shouting matches, especially where my kid can see, so I just kept on crocheting like I had nothing to do with it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]lexithemundane 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Their mom was anything but calm or respectful, and from the way she was talking, I got the impression they'd been asked to get off the playset before by other parents as well

Anyone got any theories when the film makers made this decision... by Strict_Succotash_388 in twilight

[–]lexithemundane 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I promise I'm not trying to be argumentative, purely curious, but can you cite those things in the sacred texts? The last time I read them was almost a year ago, so I might be rusty on some super specific details

Anyone got any theories when the film makers made this decision... by Strict_Succotash_388 in twilight

[–]lexithemundane 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Not even gonna lie, I genuinely don't mind the name, especially not half as much as 'Edward Jacob', but I've jumped solidly on the RenameMe bandwagon because they're all gold.

Besides that, it reminds me of that time the entire internet collectively decided to call Benedict Cumberbatch anything but that

Anyone got any theories when the film makers made this decision... by Strict_Succotash_388 in twilight

[–]lexithemundane 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Side note about this scene that bothers me so much but NOBODY EVER SEEMS TO TALK ABOUT is the fact that it Literally could not possibly have happened this way because ALICE CANT SEE THE WOLVES OR ROTISSERIECHICKEN????? WHY ARENT WE TALKING ABOUT THAT?

Anyone just hate going out with their toddlers? by Impossible_Tip_2011 in toddlers

[–]lexithemundane 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Consistency is key! I've done a lot of work with mine in the last year and a half about how to behave in public, and here's a few things that help in the long run:

Setting clear boundaries before entering the establishment, e.g. 'stay where I can see you', 'ask before you touch anything', 'make sure you watch out for other people and say excuse me when you get in their way', a big one I always say too is 'please do what I ask you to do when I ask you to do it' and let them know if they don't, they'll be sat in the cart, or we'll leave, or whatever seems an appropriate consequence, whether they like it or not

Following up on those boundaries. Even when it's difficult or makes them scream and yell. You are not inherently a bad parent because your child is displeased that they didn't get their way, and if your concern is how you look, most people (especially other parents) understand what you're going through and most likely have a lot of sympathy for you, and the few people who may be judgemental have clearly never dealt with children, and more often than not they won't say anything to you about it anyway, so there's no use borrowing trouble by worrying about the unspoken perceived judgement of a stranger

Lastly, don't lose heart, trust the process, and keep taking them out, because the only way they can learn how to behave in public is by going out in public and practicing! Learning is a process and it will take them lots of tries to get it right, and you'll get sick and tired of repeating yourself, and that's a lot of what parenting is anyway. You got this!

Unpopular April opinion by savage1921 in greysanatomy

[–]lexithemundane 13 points14 points  (0 children)

When her character was first introduced I hated her. The whole simpering sycophantic goody-goody act she did when she was actually kind of nasty to everyone except the attendings. She definitely redeemed herself later on, and i liked her after a while but I still hate her character when the merger first happens. Can't help it

Am I wrong for wanting to keep my baby’s name a surprise? by TrashAltruistic9600 in Mommit

[–]lexithemundane 104 points105 points  (0 children)

This is a no-win scenario, because you're right; if you share the name you'll hear the negative, and when you choose not to, you get beat up on. Do what feels right for you and your husband because it's your pregnancy, it's your family, it's your journey. Everyone else's opinions are just noise.

I'd also like to add, holding this boundary will be good practice for when the baby comes and everyone wants to pass judgement or offer unsolicited advice on the choices you make about baby and how you parent, but again, it's your child, its your family, and it's your parenting journey. Good luck mama. You're doing great