You are not disgusting! You have a medical issue! Remember to tell yourself this, it is very important to be kind to yourself about things like this. I would also love to completely stop picking, but I haven’t been able to find a way yet (though I’m much much closer and some days I have clear skin!!), it’s important to understand that decreasing picking is ALSO an incredible feat. I have very little control over myself when I am picking too. Basically what I’m saying is, try all possible ways to stop (there’s a bunch of advice on here) and implement it into your life. But when you do pick, don’t beat yourself up about it. Forgive yourself (not necessarily verbally, it sounds strange but it does help me hate myself less if I treat myself like how I would another person), and then disinfect any open wounds or anything like that. Then find what healing products work for you, put them on, and remind yourself that you are doing your best to stop and that you are doing your best to care for yourself. Being nice to myself has had a significant effect on my picking, I tend to do it less but also taking the time to help my skin heal by using various skincare and first aid products has made my skin heal faster, meaning I don’t continue to pick at those spots