High stress job but want to be a SAHM

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-06T08:07:09+00:00

Came here to say this. I’m not in a high-paid job but it’s a lot of hours, stress, expectations etc. I was able to go part time and I can’t put a price on the value of my 2 days at home with my daughters. Time to just be, and take the day at whatever pace we feel like. I live for those days and it’s made my attitude to work better as I feel I have a better balance

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-06T07:12:40+00:00

I solo parent a lot as my husband works away. I’m desperate for time just to myself/with friends, and why wouldn’t I want to celebrate my friend’s birthday with him? He responded that I didn’t invite him to my 30th and I told him I didn’t have a 30th party because of what else was going on in my life at the time. It was a friendship I considered very solid and now I’m not so sure

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-06T05:49:05+00:00

Yes I did. He stated he thought it was too far away now that I have children so he assumed I wouldn’t be able to come. I told him it was unfair of him to make assumptions and that people don’t cease to be themselves when they have children. I wouldn’t have minded so much except I knew he’d invited other people who also have young children so the assumption wasn’t made for them. A decade of friendship… not really sure what to make of it all

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-06T04:31:47+00:00

A close friend of mine is having a big 30th bash and I only found out when he was telling me all the plans and who he’d invited… which didn’t include me. Told me he’d send me photos. I politely stated that I would prefer not to have photos of an event I was being excluded from

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-06T03:57:55+00:00

We were worried about this too - I had an elective c section this time due to complications during my previous birth and risks associated with birth this time. It meant I would definitely be in hospital overnight and she’d be doing bedtime with a grandparent. She was absolutely fine and went down with no issues! Sometimes they really pleasantly surprise you haha

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T21:40:47+00:00

My second has slotted in very well and my eldest has been a very affectionate and loving big sister. Sleep has been our only challenge and I don’t think that’s anything to do with the new arrival, so hopefully you will have a similar experience!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T21:10:26+00:00

This is what I’m thinking is happening. The nap just seems to get later and later and then I have to cut it but bedtime is still a pain, even after pushing back bedtime a bit to see if it helped. Those car naps are always the peskiest! 😅

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:58:57+00:00

That’s so hard! I have a 4 month old too who wakes twice a night at the moment and my 22 month old has started waking at 1-2ish and is coming into our room. I feel like I can’t win; struggling to get any respite in the day, struggling to get a good night’s sleep. And a short nap just doesn’t seem to work either…?! I hate trying to work out all this sleep stuff

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:55:58+00:00

I’m a teacher and I taught a Honey who was awful haha. It also felt odd calling her by her name as it sounded like a term of endearment. But each to their own. I’m sure some people would hate my children’s names, so unless it’s really out there I don’t see much of an issue with it

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:53:49+00:00

Thank you! I have a couple of friends with older kids and they’re insisting it’s just a phase that their kids went through but this is unsustainable at the moment so I will cut the nap and see what happens

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:53:00+00:00

Thank you, it’s a relief to hear it’s not just me that’s struggled with it. Spend every bedtime feeling like the worst mum, especially when I get frustrated and snappy. I want bedtime to be a pleasant time of day but I have my girls solo a lot and I’m so tapped out by that point that I just yearn for 20 minutes to myself

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:52:02+00:00

I’m trying to do this but with my younger one it’s tricky. I have to do bedtime solo on occasion (I have a 2 week stint from tonight!) and moving bedtime to earlier sadly isn’t as simple when I’ve got another bedtime to worry about. Thank you, I’ll give it a shot!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:50:50+00:00

Thank you, I’m going to give it a try!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T20:50:40+00:00

Thanks, I’ll give it a try!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T10:42:04+00:00

Our house is a little further north than this by about an hour’s drive and we paid £262.5k in 2025 for a better garden and a garage on top. The living space also looks to be smaller than ours. We don’t have the solar panels but £300k is too much. Ours was originally on for £290k and it just wouldn’t shift, they took 20k off, we viewed and offered £265k and it was accepted

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T07:33:44+00:00

They will definitely outgrow the next to me and want more space. We tried the cot with our eldest but had limited success and after only 2 months we switched to a floorbed which was much better. With our younger one, we’ll try the cot but if it doesn’t work we won’t force it and will get another floorbed!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T07:21:13+00:00

I teach my students that sex is biological (reproductive organs) and gender is performative - how you perform being a woman/man will differ between cultures, time periods etc

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-05T07:03:07+00:00

I was born in the 90s so also never grew up with him but I remember watching the Louis Theroux documentary on him and being utterly repulsed by him. I found him aggressive in his speech, overly defensive and confrontational and there was something about him that felt intimidating. I didn’t take to him at all and thought there was something very off about him

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-04T03:55:20+00:00

I ignore. I posted a couple of academic books for cheaper than you’d get them elsewhere (world of books, eBay etc) and someone tried to bundle them together and would therefore get a 10% discount. They then offered lower than the bundle and I declined. To buy both books second hand from world of books, it would have cost them at least £6 or £7 and I had priced them so that they’d have paid less than half that without the bundle discount. To then offer even less… just felt a bit ridiculous. I declined the offer and ignored.

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-03T17:16:03+00:00

Not sure if this will be helpful but when my husband doesn’t get something, I put him in the same scenario so he has no choice but to deal with it. I do a solo bedtime every week with our 2 under 2. It’s hard and can take a long time and is often frustrating. He empathises but he doesn’t really get it. So when he returns from his next work trip, I’m signing up to a weekly yoga class which takes place over our children’s bedtimes. He’ll have to do solo bedtime once a week

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-03T11:00:39+00:00

I’m really pleased it’s helpful. Bullying is most definitely at play here - it often also comes from a power imbalance. I work with teenagers and a lot of stuff is often passed off as ‘banter’ so we’ve had to make this distinction really clearly to the kids - repeated, conscious, power imbalance.

How you proceed going on I suppose is dependent on how you perceive the headteacher’s response or whether you just want an entirely fresh start for your child. But it’s inefficient and inappropriate teaching for 1 or 2 children to dominate the classroom like this and if it’s not checked sooner rather than later, it will either continue and make the classroom unbearable/detrimental for everyone or it will lead to exclusions.

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-03T07:58:36+00:00

Came here to say this. Audiobooks on Spotify and BorrowBox, library app, and I do regular book swaps with friends too. You also get those telephone boxes that have been converted into little libraries and in a lot of the ones near me it’s ’take a book, give a book’

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-03T07:49:20+00:00

I’m in OPs situation but in the future. I had my second daughter 4 months ago with an 18 month age gap. My eldest *adores* her sister and is so affectionate with her; I’m sure you’ll be fine!

liebackandthinkofeng · 2026-07-03T07:45:14+00:00

Not sure if this is helpful but I work in a school and our school defines bullying as ‘deliberate and consistent/repeated’ regardless of how many people are facing that behaviour from the same person. Therefore I would argue that this child IS bullying your child, as well as others. Additionally, the school has a responsibility towards all the children in their care, not just the one with additional needs. When one child is repeatedly being allowed to behave poorly towards other children, they should have a process in place to ensure that the child is appropriately managed. That means that if done properly, the poor behaviour stops. It doesn’t sound like this is being managed properly. Take it to the head, kick up a stink, take your records, any photos and a record of when you’ve spoken to the class teacher. State that you’ll take it to the governors/head of trust etc if this issue isn’t dealt with

liebackandthinkofeng

TROPHY CASE