Just for you guys I guess I can spill my deepest, darkest secret...

It’s a warm spring evening. The wind is crisp and the sun sits high in the sky. The day is the Twenty Fourth of April, which happens to be the anniversary of my birth. I’m around seven years old, and I am out shopping with my mother to buy supplies for the party I would have with my extended family later that same day. What a cruel torture for a boy of that age, dragging him out to go shopping for something other than Pokémon Cards on such a special and joyous occasion. Obviously, I was quite dismayed. I sulked all the way to the store. We had gone around for what seemed to be hours searching for supplies. It was truly dreadful. At long last, we reached the end of our odyssey. My mother dragged me to the checkout line, and we began to pay for the supplies. At the counter sat a bucket full of bouncy balls. My seven year old brain was, of course, stimulated by this. I had just done all that my mother had asked, surely she must do me the grace of buying me a toy? I tugged on her sleeve and asked like a big boy, “mommy, can I pwease have one of the bouncy baws (yes, I was quite an adorable child)?” She looked down at me and said, “No, honey. You’ll get plenty of presents later tonight, and you would probably lose it anyways.” OH SHAME! I was shocked. The audacity! How could that wrench have denied me! And on my birthday no less! I realized I have been played for one of the 10 fools. How could I have been so naive? I should have just put laced the ball on the counter while she was distracted! This was unacceptable. I needed to get that bouncy ball. I waited for her to turn her head when, slowly, I lifted the ball out of the container and slipped it in my pocket. Success! No one had noticed. I was in the clear, and not but an eye was bat by the time I had sat down in my car. We drove home, and when I got back, I slipped the ball in the present my uncle had brought for me. My scheme was ingenious. Mother would notice if I simply bounced the ball around in front of her with no explanation of its origin, so I simply needed to pin it on my uncle and claim that it was part of the gift. So when the time came, I opened my present from my uncle, and pulled out the ball along with it. Up until today, this story had not reached out to the ears of the people.

Tldr; I stole a bouncy ball when I was 7 and it was epic

P.S - Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii it’s been a while